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Genealogy

Help Ancestry DNA Results back and shocker

33 replies

Niblo · 21/12/2022 01:57

I done an ancestry dna to try and find my grandfather’s biological family as he was adopted but upon getting my results this match came up.

I share 1488 cm with this woman. I have no idea who she is but her dna matches me closer than family I have known all my life.

Does anybody have any experience with dna results that high and what possible relative it could be?.

OP posts:
happiertimes123 · 21/12/2022 02:02

According to this calculator dnapainter.com/tools/sharedcmv4 , it's grandparent, aunt, uncle, half sibling. Niece/nephew or grandchild. How old is the woman?

Niblo · 21/12/2022 02:11

I have no idea as there is no profile. She has 3 people in her tree that doesn’t fit any in my close family tree, two are living and one passed away. I think the relative is the daughter of the deceased listed and the girl managing the tree is her daughter. I have a profile name with the number 80 on the end so I assume her daughter was born in 1980.

I am my mothers only child, my father has 3 boys, 1 girl and then me. I can’t make her fit but clearly she does.

Definitely not a grandparent as I am the baby of the family and my grandparents if alive today would be way over 100.

Not my grandchild

Not a niece or nephew of my siblings I know at least anyways but maybe possible half from my fathers checkered past.

I have messaged but no response as she hasn’t been on her account for over a year, it’s driving me slightly mad

OP posts:
DuchessofSandwich · 21/12/2022 02:31

Maybe she was the product of a one night stand or short affair that your father or grandfather didn't know of? I hope she messages back.

Blueskythinking123 · 21/12/2022 07:16

I have a friend find a half sister via DNA ancestry. They were from a relationship their dad had prior to the one he had with their mum.

The mum knew nothing about the child (from memory o think the dad did). All I know is it caused a lot of upset.

CoffeeBoy · 21/12/2022 07:22

I had a friend this happened to and it turned out to be a half sister. Neither were aware they had a half sibling. My friends parents are both dead and this other woman her parents were both dead. But they worked out they shared a dad. So my friends half sister had grown up thinking her step dad was her dad. My friends dad must have had a one night stand, we don’t even know if he knew he had another kid,

Niblo · 21/12/2022 15:00

She hasn't been on her account for over a year so is not answering messages. That's quite frustrating as I would really like to know

OP posts:
tulips27 · 21/12/2022 15:03

Can you ask your father?

Niblo · 21/12/2022 15:05

I could ask but I don't have alot to go on, I don't even have a name as she is a living person on the tree there is no details

OP posts:
CoffeeBoy · 21/12/2022 15:05

Can you track her down on fb, etc?

Niblo · 21/12/2022 15:25

I have tried looking for the man that has passed to try and work it out, I've looked for newspaper articles of his death to see if anyone is mentioned but I can't find anything. I don't have a Facebook account but I will get my friend to search and see if any show up with the username of the person who runs the dna test

OP posts:
Georgeskitchen · 21/12/2022 15:51

If you click on the dna it should give you possibles of what the relationship is.

Niblo · 21/12/2022 19:01

Georgeskitchen · 21/12/2022 15:51

If you click on the dna it should give you possibles of what the relationship is.

The only possibility is a half sibling

OP posts:
fallfallfall · 22/12/2022 01:22

Unless your mother or father was a twin.

Gingerkittykat · 22/12/2022 01:38

Give an alternative way for her to contact you in an ancestry message, you can only reply to messages if you have a paid subscription which is unlikely if she has not been on the site for a year.

Ancestry normally emails me when there is a new DNA match.

Niblo · 22/12/2022 05:38

Gingerkittykat · 22/12/2022 01:38

Give an alternative way for her to contact you in an ancestry message, you can only reply to messages if you have a paid subscription which is unlikely if she has not been on the site for a year.

Ancestry normally emails me when there is a new DNA match.

Oh I did not realise this, I will send another message now. Thanks

OP posts:
NoNameNowAgain · 22/12/2022 05:55

You say ‘matches me closer than family I have known all my life.’. Can you see who your common matches are and therefore see which side of the family she’s on. That is whether she is also related to any cousins, aunts or uncles on there.
I can see it might drive you a bit bonkers trying to find out who she is.

tulips27 · 22/12/2022 07:54

Niblo · 21/12/2022 15:05

I could ask but I don't have alot to go on, I don't even have a name as she is a living person on the tree there is no details

I meant ask him who this person is, as it sounds like the most likely possibility is that this is a half-sibling on his side. Wouldn't he know about the existence of other children?

NavyKitchen · 22/12/2022 07:57

Send me a pm, there are other possibilities, not just half sister. There's also ways to identify which side of the family etc. I've done lots of AncestryDNA work with quite a few people (including my own). I'm happy to guide you through it. Screen shot everything though because sometimes, people delete their information after you contact them.

CharityShopChic · 22/12/2022 16:09

Agree that you need to tread carefully. This may be as big a shock to this person as it has been for you. I would advise sending a very neutral message to your match, something like "have just done a DNA match and you're my closest result, would love to work out how we fit together" rather than "OMG you're the half sister I never knew about". And yes, include an email so they can contact you.

Be prepared for them NOT to contact you. Not because there has been some big secret uncovered, but because people lose interest in genealogy for all sorts of reasons - the fact that you say she has a sum total of 3 people in her tree says to me she was never that interested in the first place. Lots of people take the Ancestry DNA test to find out their ethnicity, what % Irish/Viking they are (even though it's not that scientific) and then once they have their results never log into the site again.

There is lots you can do to work things out, such as sorting your matches into maternal and paternal to find out whether this rogue match is on your mum's side or dad's side, and then looking at shared matches. I'd advise accepting @NavyKitchen 's very kind offer of help, or looking on one of the many Facebook groups which help people work out what might be happening.

Anotherusernameanotheday · 30/12/2022 06:51

Dp has just had this. He was contacted by a match.
She was convinced that she was the daughter of a neighbour. Neighbour had the same surname as dp. She had a photo of the man in question and he was the spitting image of dps father. She was able to contact the man's only child who fortunately agreed to do a DNA test after some persuasion. Turned out they were half sisters and the woman was not an only child. The neighbour was actually dps uncle or his father's cousin !

PritiPatelsMaker · 30/12/2022 14:58

Hope you've had some response by now Flowers

grayhairdontcare · 30/12/2022 15:09

A cousin and her sister did one of these tests and it turns out that they are not sisters but cousins.
So this was a really stressful family few months

Einszwei · 30/12/2022 15:11

I would start organising all your DNA matches using the Leeds Method. This should allow you to have a better understanding of where this unexpected match fits into your tree.

LadyGaGasPokerFace · 30/12/2022 15:13

I have someone who is a 926cm match. So a 1st or second cousin that is 13% match. I know my cousins, the name doesn’t ring a bell and they’re in the USA. My parents are from C/E Europe.

PritiPatelsMaker · 30/12/2022 15:30

Have you done one @grayhairdontcare?

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