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Genealogy

Ancestry.com nobody replies to messages, why??

6 replies

ragged · 28/03/2011 04:10

Almost nobody, anyway. I pm to say "I'm interested in somebody in your tree, can we chat?!" and they rarely reply.

One guy nicely replied, I ended up scanning in some documents for him -- he hasn't even acknowledged receipt.

Are email addys defunct for many tree-holders, is there a culture of ignoring people ....why don't people reply?

OP posts:
redexpat · 24/04/2012 14:28

I usually give a bit more info on my side. Hi - I'm researching x person who I think was my ... And then I ask a direct question. I tend to do research in intensive boughts, so I might reply a bit later.

Kazuo · 02/05/2012 22:13

I agree with Expat. Be very specific. Avoid coming across as an amateur family historian. Bear in mind people may take a long time to respond though they fully intend to!

longjane · 04/05/2012 14:31

also remember to check when they were last on line some people put a tree and then forget about it.
some people work in a library so log on every so offen.
others take a break when real life get too much
and remember they might not related to anyone in the tree you are interested in.

the best thing to do i find is say i am interested in xxx in your tree (name the tree if they have more that one up) and then say why? ( he is my grandfather etc)
the big thing is family history is patience.
new records come on line all the time and new people get interested put up trees.
I have reply to message board on ancestry that were posted years ago and i still have got replys and help and info

lemonaid · 04/05/2012 14:42

A lot of people have uploaded stuff and haven't really been doing anything active for a while, and may also miss message notifications. When I last logged in I had 3 or 4 unread messages going back over the last couple of months (I did reply to them all and apologise for delay, though).

I agree, though, that giving a bit of background information and asking a direct question is often best. That way you don't come across as "Hello, I have been researching my family for five minutes since I saw a repeat of Who Do You Think You Are and I want you to hand over all your research that took you years. I won't really understand or appreciate the sources you've cited or that unsourced suggestions don't carry equal weight with solidly substantiated events, and I'll indiscriminately merge your data in with low-quality stuff that I've got from anyone else who will answer me."

sparkle12mar08 · 11/05/2012 08:15

I agree with others here. You need to provide detail and essentially demonstrate your own credentials. You need to sound articulate, and genuinely interested in the people/relative concerned, and not like a name collector. It also helps if you can specifically offer them some information too, but is not essential. I say something like "I'm researching X who I believe to be my blah blah blah, and I'm related through my maternal father's line/my grandfather's brother etc. I'm interested in them because xyz, and would love to share my research with you, do you have any further information on abc in relation to them?"

AgathaTrunchbull · 05/01/2013 20:32

Good advice above.

I've had loads of messages from people who're interested in/offering info about people I'm only very, very distantly related to. Comes of having far too many people on the tree, of course and being addicted to adding more! Had a similar experience as you with a distant cousin in Australia. This chap clearly only had limited access to the site and asked for information on his ancestors in the UK, which I dutifully typed up (all 16 pages of it!!) in narrative form. Haven't heard from him since I emailed it all over. Angry

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