I fried it up in a delicious omelette with some other "herbs" ... then, feeling very smug, was going through my wildflower book and read "On no account should you eat any umbellifer without being 100% certain what it is. Mistakes can be fatal.”
Below this was a clear illustration of leaf types, showing wild celery alongside hemlock (its “potential confusion species”). The wild celery is pinnately divided (i.e. a slender central stem with stalks on either side with a single lobed leaflet on each stalk). Hemlock has two or three per stalk.
Imagine my surprise when I went back into the kitchen and laid the remaining leaves out on the counter 😬
There is no antidote - you just have to get to a hospital ASAP for airway management, ventilation, seizure control, and dialysis if needed. Even small amounts can be fatal. Every part of the plant is toxic. Cooking makes no difference.
It was kind of hard to explain at A&E reception, so we just sat there for hours waiting for the poison to start shutting down my neuromuscular system (progressive paralysis, respiratory failure, death...). As the clock ticked on, we just had to assume that no news was good news, but it was a relief when the doctor finally checked me over and sent me home.
Apart from violent gastric upset, dizziness, blurred vision (for a while) and a headache, I got away with it. I've never been so scared in my life (although a close encounter with a pit viper in the Peruvian jungle came close!).
Sharing here as a warning to others, although I doubt anyone else as stupid as me 🤡