What should be done and when?! And overwhelm!

[MummySharkDoodoododoo]

Right so long story short, 3 years ago we moved from a city terraced home, to our dream home in the countryside with 1.5 acres of land. Sounds amazing right?

3 years in, we are feeling so overwhelmed with it all. Don't get to enjoy the gardens because it takes so much to maintain even basic levels of gardening.

I think some of the issue could be that we don't really know what we should be doing at what time of year. Of course we could Google each individual plant, but we have so many. I'm wondering if there's an easy way to know what time of year we should be doing what?

Ie what time of year should we be cutting back hedges and trees? Grass we keep on top of. We use a ride on for most of it and a normal mower for the smaller garden at the back (as the ride on doesn't fit through the gate!) that's the easy bit. But there's so many shrubs, bushes, roses, etc most of which we don't even know how they SHOULD look let alone how to keep them that way!

We have a large flock of chickens and ducks too but they are great and we keep on top of their maintenance.

We have wondered about goats, because I love them but also wonder if they would kept keep everything a bit trimmed. But we would need to get to a point with the bushes that we can secure the boundaries properly first anyway.

Stinging nettles are the absolute bain of my life. I feel like we just don't stop pulling them out and they reappear quicker than we can pull them. The kids hardly use their outdoor play areas now because of the nettles. Which is so sad as we moved to give them a better, more outdoor active lifestyle. They have swings, trampolines etc all just sat unused and filthy because we haven't been keeping on top of it all.

Anyway, any advice?! 🙈 I know there's no easy fix. We knew it would be hard work. We had an allotment before so knew how tricky it can be to keep on top of things. But now aren't even getting the time to grow any fruit and veg due to the sheer amount of maintenance gardening!

Sorry for long post. Should have asked for help a long time ago really. We are carers and have a disabled child needing a lot of our time, on top of working. So it's all just taken a back step at times.

When i started gardening 35 years ago i watched gardners world avidly for years. Each week they go through what you should be doing at that time of year as well as planning ahead.

I think some of the issue could be that we don't really know what we should be doing at what time of year. Of course we could Google each individual plant, but we have so many. I'm wondering if there's an easy way to know what time of year we should be doing what?
Part of the problem is that you are maintaining somebody else's garden. Re-design it to suit your needs.

I like Bunny Guinness's approach to gardening because she is so practical. She's posh and monied but she's practical She has a large garden but she insists only takes her two days a week - one day of her and one of her handyman / undergardener. Labour-intensive jobs are either eliminated, subbed out or automated. The last one can be initially expensive but can save money in the long run.

What's the worst thing that can happen if you prune at the wrong time? You may lose flowers next season but it's not really the end of the world. Sometimes just 'being tidy' is the better outcome. Gain knowledge by speaking to neighbours, joining the gardening club, watching Gardeners' World. And keep a journal/diary that you can refer to next year.

Stinging nettles are the absolute bane of my life. I feel like we just don't stop pulling them out and they reappear quicker than we can pull them.
Mow them. Then mow again. And again ...
Eventually, you will win.

Goats will eat everything bare and there'll be nothing left. Sheep should still leave something.

Let go of the "should" it's trapping you

If you do nothing because of fear of getting it wrong or just that you don't know what to do, it will continue to get out of hand until it's entirety overgrown and unusable.

Have a go at doing whatever you want to do when you have time. Autumn is a great time to prune bushes and trees. If you do something wrong, a plant might grow slower than it otherwise would have, or might not flower the next year, the odd plant might even die. But how is that worse than an unuseable garden?

Done is better than perfect and the joy of gardening is having a go and learning on the job.

Probably the first thing to sort though would be the kids play area. Get a gas weed burner and burn the nettles! It'll be fun and done in an hour. Maybe install a weed proof membrane under their equipment and cover with bark?

Right, here goes!

Roses. They should be pruned in early February - by Valentine's Day. That makes it easy to remember. Check the RHS website for details on how to prune roses.

Flowering shrubs. If they flower in spring, they are flowering on the wood that grew the previous year. You prune them immediately after flowering. If they flower later the year, then you prune them in early spring because they flower on the current year's growth.

Hedges can be pruned now, but if they have a lot of berries it is better to wait until the birds have feasted on them. The other time to prune them would be early spring, but if you do that, you will get no flowers or berries that year. Evergreen hedges can be pruned in the autumn or spring.

Trees don't need pruning at all unless they are sick, have dead branches or because they are in the way. You will need to look up each species to find the best time of year to work on them.

DO NOT prune hedges, trees or really big shrubs in the nesting season - it is illegal to disturb nesting birds.

If some shrubs have got massive, then check out 'renovation pruning' and how to do it. Again you will need to know the species.

Keep mowing nettles and other pernicious weeds. Constantly - every couple of days if necessary, and they will eventually give up.

I'll come back later - off out to gardening club tonight. 🙂

The RHS has a month-by-month calendar.
RHS

once youve identified what is in your garden, I would devise a personal gardening calendar and group all the jobs by month. Many gardening books and gardeners world tv series and website all do the same. This way you know what you need to get through each month.

it may also be useful to split your garden into sections and concentrate on one section each year if its really big. Start with the section closest to the house and what you can see through windows.

Use chat gtp. Take a snap of the area ask what needs to be done to create a low maintenance garden.

In my experience most things will survive whatever you chop off. Just hack away until you like the look. Then over the next year keep an eye on what did well.

You have plenty of room to rewild a section if that seems like something you’d like to do. I’ve done this with an area at the top of my very steep garden. Try to ensure that it includes a tree and/or shrubs, fence it off (post and rail or stock fencing) and do absolutely nothing with it! If you don’t like untidy then pick a bit that you can’t see from your house.
After a couple of years native plants will start to take over and you will be providing a valuable habitat for creatures you may never see but that are an essential part of the ecosystem.
NB this is not a pretty wildflower meadow- they are hard work.