AIBU with new neighbour?

[Sallymads]

Hello fellow gardeners, sorry for the long winded post!
We bought a house last year (haven’t moved in yet), mainly because of the large plot it came with and they’re hard to come by in this area. Previous owners were gardeners many, many moons ago so I thought I’d leave it till spring to see what plants/flowers may spring up if any. Sadly not many, however it’s massively overgrown with ivy and brambles, they’ve taken over everything even the beautiful willow and robin tree at the back. I’ve started cutting it back so our 3 kids can actually get out there and play (checked everywhere for nests first).

I started right at the back where there’s roughly 4 meters covered in vines. I’d cleared a fair bit when the neighbour to the back of us popped their head through it all and asked am I moving in, to which I replied hello yes, then they immediately said we don’t want any gaps, we don’t want to be able to see. I said I’m cutting it back so the kids can play and tried to make conversation about how overgrown it is and they repeated they don’t want any gaps and walked off. Roughly an hour later I was trimming again- about 3 meters away from the back of their garden and I could see them stood at the boundary watching me.😶
The issue I have is, all of the greenery, trees and shrubs etc is all from our land that have grown towards the source of light( towards the back). They can’t stop me cutting it back can they? My other issue is, my 5 year old is on the pathway for suspected asd and he WILL climb through the back onto their property, he’s no sense whatsoever. My main priority is a safe, secure garden. He absolutely loves the outdoors, so the plan is to fence it off anyway but I fear there’ll be a boundary dispute now. It seems they kept it all nice and trim their side to stop it taking over their garden, but they’re quite happy to have our side completely inaccessible. I should note my oh did knock on to introduce us and express the plans for our garden but they didn’t answer. I have stopped for now because I feel quite uncomfortable but would you carry on cutting it back? Thank you x

Cut it all out and put in a proper boundary at the point they trimmed it to, if there’s no other obvious boundary features. Can you work out where it is/should be?

No, they can’t stop you cutting anything back in your garden unless it’s a tree with a TPO on it, but that’s very unlikely, and you’re not cutting the trees anyway!

I’m sure they’d like a barrier; but in that case they need to sacrifice some of their garden for it! What CFs!

They have no right to stop you trimming anything in your garden unless it’s a tree with a TPO. If they don’t want gaps then they can plant on their own side to fill them. They’re trying to bully you, just smile and wave.

I'd carry on. They can't dictate what's planted in your garden. If they don't want any gaps they can do something themselves and don't be afraid to tell them that. Though you could always go for a nicer climber to fill the space. Personally I hate ivy, it's thuggish and an absolute beast to get rid of. The bindweed in our back garden is easier to deal with than the ivy in the front. I know there's at least one member on here who thinks I'm the devil for saying so but it really is awful.

Sod them. Smile and carry on. As long as you put in a good boundary to stop your DS getting through they have nothing to say about it at all!

Where and what is your actual boundary? Is there a fence?

As long as you're in your own garden, you can do what you want to it.

Sounds like the neighbours have been used to having a nice quiet garden and perhaps they don't want to see or hear your dc next door, but they're being VU.

They are being unreasonable on the clearing and can’t dictate what you do in your garden, it’s none of their business and if they want screening they can put it up. You would be unreasonable not to prevent your child from entering their property though so you need to sort some kind of fence as a matter of priority if you are removing the current barrier.

They cannot stop you cutting back anything within your boundary, it will all need cutting back anyway if you are putting a fence up. Is it your responsibility to fence it, check your deeds. The fencer may need access from their side so it's best to try and maintain a good relationship if you can. They are probably used to having it there as security and privacy.

Big fence at the back with no gaps should solve the issue surely?

Don't you know where your boundary is?

Try and get photos that clearly show where they have cut back to (and will be recognisable once you have cut back from your side). If they have done as you say and maintained their side they have indicated where they feel the boundary is. This may prove useful if they try to dispute the boundary later.

Gosh no they can't stop you from cutting back and clearing in your own garden! But I think we need a diagram. 😉

Yes we have all the boundary plans, it doesn’t say whose responsibility the fence is though, it runs post to post from either sides gardens on a slight diagonal. If it wasn’t erected on the boundary and in our garden it would mean having to sacrifice some trees inc the beautiful red robin :( and would look unsightly from their side if it was set back from the boundary. They’d lose sight of all the greenery in place of a fence, my suggestion would be to plant greenery on their own side, but that would mean them losing some space and I’m too chicken to say😄I want to keep all of the trees and shrubs but things are struggling to grow atm they’re being smothered by it all. I’ve attached a pic of a little section at the back so you can see what I’m trying to battle with!

Find out where your boundary is in case they've taken over some of your garden, strim up to it to your heart's content and then put a fence up. I imagine they've got used to a quiet garden with lots of greenery - almost like looking out onto a hedgerow - but you have every right to the garden you paid for. If they want greenery they can plant it on their side, they have no right to dictate what a neighbour does to their land (within reason of course).

This is the estate agents pic from last year but it’s since gotten out of control😮pathways have disappeared! Haha

They don't get to choose if there any gaps. They will have to plant or screen on their side as its your home and garden and you have it as you want . Yes I undestand how they feel as neighours have removed all the ivy from their garden and I miss all the nesting birds , and we have lost privacy, but I don't want to replicate overgrown ivy in my garden so I have to suck it up .

6ft fence. Mutter to yourself you don't want to see awful ndn's..

Your garden. Strim and replace the fence. If they want greenery they plant it themselves. You can strip your garden bare if you want!

A fence would be safer for security and to stop your child running through to their garden. If there are fence posts there then maybe there was a fence before, your deeds will show whose boundary they are on and the neighbours may know who has responsibility for that but you dont need to put up a fence legally.

What will be left in you do manage to get rid of the ivy and brambles, maybe they think you are cutting it all down. If you are left with shrubs are they dense and provide cover.

As others have said make sure you have boundary evidence etc but in terms of your gardening they don't have a leg to stand on.

And given their rudeness I wouldn't waste any time on planting to keep them happy either.

They're quite capable of planting their side if they want continuous greenery.

Just stick up a fence and do what you want.

Yes, they don't know you and may be worried that you're one of those types who cut down all the trees and pave / astroturf over the entire garden. 🙈
The neighbour was rude and obviously you can do whatever you like, but for the sake of good neighbourly relations I'd try to have a chat and explain what your plans are re. cutting back overgrown bits and putting in a fence. They probably won't want your child wandering into their garden either.

Well quite. Where are the ‘no such thing as weeds’ crew on this thread 😁 OP that looks like a cracking plot!

If they don’t want gaps I would suggest that then was their responsibility to cover them from their side

Where are the ‘no such thing as weeds’ crew on this thread No need for the jibe. You’ve missed the point. There are no plants which have to be removed regardless. That’s not the same as saying you have to keep every plant growing in your garden.

They have no say in what you do with your garden. I can't believe anybody would have the nerve to tell somebody else what they must do with their garden.

Not a jibe, just an observation. I would have thought it was the perfect opportunity for them to say the wildlife needs it to be left as they’ve adapted to it now. My eco morals may not be perfect, but at least they’re consistent. Apologies for the derail, OP.