Why do my kids hate my allotment!

[Mutabilis]

Just had another really disappointing allotment visit where the kids moaned, complained, fought with each other and begged to go home until I gave up after 30mins and we came home again. They are 8 and 3, how do I get them interested or at least occupied enough that I can actually garden?! Everything is so overgrown and I can't tackle it as they won't let me get on with it. They bring toys and scooters with them, they've got their own gardening tools that they won't use (they only want to use mine and risk impaling themselves or each other on a hoe), they're both scared of worms and bugs so I can't engage them on a bug hunt. I even bring cake but they eat it and then say "can we go home now." They do like fruit picking but it never lasts long enough. Has anyone got any tried and tested ideas that work with their kids? I'd love them to enjoy gardening too, but I'm happy to settle for them just playing so I can dig and weed.

I had the same problem and tbh firm boundaries were the answer. Once they'd had a few session of winging and complaining to no effect they stopped doing it and just sort of got on with things.
Sometimes kids have to go through the discomfort of boredom before their imaginations kick in and they think of something to do.
One thing that did help was making them a den. If your at the land clearing stage I'd prioritise clearing a space where they can hang out comfortably. Maybe give them some thing to sit on and make walls out of.

Tbh I think you'd be hard pushed to find other children of that age interested in gardening!

Give them a patch of their own?

Mine have always loved having their own bed, which increased in size over the years, to the extent that now they are older they do the whole plot on their own.

I don’t agree Disc, mine have always loved it.

my allotment is overgrown as well this year I'm not worrying too much popped there last week and cut some stuff down and put some ground sheets down.
Was meant to pop there this morning but never got there will try again tomorrow.

The corn and tomatoes I planted before lockdown are doing well even though I've only watered them a couple of times.

I also wanted the kids to enjoy gardening but it's not happening so I brought a trampoline, so when they want to play on it they know we have to go to the allotment to play so now they enjoy going to the allotment now.
are you allowed to put a trampoline on your plot? I noticed most people at our allotments with kids have a trampoline so have swings and slides.

What kind of toys do you take? I’d suggest toys you can play with using the dirt and plants. Mine love diving trenches for soldiers and using little figures to be explorers in the weeds jungle. Maybe an excavator or some ‘dinosaur’ bones to discover?

In an ideal world they would be thrilled to grow their own flowers but it's never going to happen. Its akin to taking them to work with you.
I like the idea of a den. Or maybe a tent to play in?

I took a farm set and construction set which lived in the shed and just let them play with it on a bare patch.

Designate part of the allotment as their messy place
Get some plastic farm animals.
Let them build a farmyard with sticks and mud and bits of scrap wood they can find from around the site.
Let them make "soup" out of the stems and leftover leaves of random veg.
Let them get filthy and muddy and smelly.
DO NOT expect them to help.
If like my son they just want to dig a bloody great hole, let them.

If going to the allotment becomes their own messy time they will come to love it.
If they just want to sit and play on a phone as the clouds scud overhead
so be it

My mother made me pick stones out of the beds on her allotment and I've never forgiven her.
I never made my kids help
and now they both do willingly

Thanks, brilliant ideas. I guess I'm over optimistic hoping they'd enjoy gardening, since I was a little child I've always loved nature and gardening, I used to play on my own with snails for hours, and thought they would be the same, but I guess not. I'm definitely going to try the den idea, that could work, silly question but what do I build a den out of? There's not much up there other than weeds and bramble. There's nowhere to sit at the moment so that's a good idea, perhaps folding chairs. I don't have a shed or a car so a bit limited in leaving toys or carrying things up there but I will see if they want to bring farm animals. They do have diggers and trucks up there, and usually bring their dolls as that's what they play with most. They would love a trampoline but I'm not sure I could carry one there, perhaps there's something I could carry flat pack and build when I get there.

Mutabilis
Pop a sign on the gate of the site asking other allotment holders to check whether they have the makings of a den stashed on their plots

• an excellent way to meet others
• a nice way for others to realise that your kids are human
• saves carrying anything to and from the site
• you might be surprised

Leaving toys up there ..... bury them
Every visit then starts with a treasure hunt ......

Den: bamboo sticks strung together at the top, old sheet or tarpaulin thrown over, held down, if necessary with stones (preferably ones you have got your children to pick out of your allotment, thus killing two birds with one stone), eh voila, a Wigwam !

Can you create a mud kitchen area, and buy a cheap pop up tent they can sit in and play.

You can't make them enjoy it if they don't. There are things that might keep an 8yo busy for long enough for you to do gardening, but not a 3yo, I shouldn't think!

My parents had allotments, dm was obsessed with them, we had to tag along & God, it could be boring sometimes!
I do have some fond memories of it though, picking tomatoes & being allowed to read old comics in the greenhouse. This was in the 70s though, I'm not sure dc today would be satisfied with that.
When I do a bit of gardening now the smell takes of the soil takes me right back to those long days on the allotment, all my siblings agree we would NEVER have one...sorry!

Next year you could make a wigwam out of bamboo canes and grow beans up them - two birds with one stone!

My parents were mad keen gardeners, and when we lived in a big town, they had an allotment, and dsis and I had to go up there with them. I can’t speak for my sister, but I did not enjoy it one bit. I didn’t share my parents love of gardening - never have and never will.

I think you need to try some of the suggestions on here (my parents never considered anything that might make me enjoy the allotment more - tbh, I don’t think they knew or cared that I didn’t like it) - making it fun for them is the best way to get them engaged with it - but if they never get to enjoy it, you need to strike a deal with them - they can take books or toys with them to the allotment, and for every 30 minutes of whinge-free gardening you get, they get a star, and can build up stars to earn a treat.

Parenting by bribery (no corruption though) worked for me!

Got a sand pit on ours.

Hadn't thought of a bamboo den/wigwam that's a good idea. I like the idea of asking if anyone has any den building materials spare too, I could try that. I appreciate the people saying they didn't enjoy being dragged to allotments when they were children, this is why I don't make them 'work' but I feel like it could be a great place to play. I'd love a mud kitchen, I wonder if I could do it with pots and pans but without the actual kitchen bit. I do try bribery, I always take sweets/cake, but I use it up just getting them there so they have it as soon as they get there for walking there (it's about 15mins walk from our house so not far). I like the star idea, perhaps earning stars towards cake would be better. I'd love to do a sandpit too, but couldn't get the sand there, it's so heavy. Giving them their own patch to dig a hole in is a great idea too, don't know why I hadn't thought of that. Thanks for so many ideas everyone. Does anyone have kids who are actually enthusiastic about gardening at all? What do they enjoy about it?

My 4yo loves watering things. She also likes growing things from seed - stuff with a fairly instant gratification like sunflowers, cress or lettuce rather than anything which takes a long time! Once you're a bit further along, both my DDs (7 and 4) enjoy picking things for dinner - we go to their grandparents and they spend their time in the garden digging up potatoes and carrots, scrubbing them outside and generally just much more involved in food production than they would be usually.

mine have happy memories of eating carrots straight from the ground
and biting tomatoes that were still on the plant
and scrumping raw french beans
and digging holes
and burying stuff

You could make a fairy garden so they can do some small world play while you’re busy or some diggers and make a dirt patch to play in collecting stones. Pens for drawing on stones and making stone people.
The more time they spend up there just playing rather than helping then hopefully in time they’ll be drawn to what you’re doing and want to help, at which point maybe give them a section of their own.

I understand your frustration though, we have a lovely big garden and the kids aren’t interested in the gardening side of it at all.

A sandpit was well loved and played in until mine were about 10.
Not that they ever built sandcastles but had lots of little plastic people - knights, pirates, cowboys etc.
We had a naff plastic one but crucially it had a lid which keeps it cleaner. Use block paving sand and get it delivered there.
A pop up tent is very light.
A shed would be a game changer if you could manage that.

I wouldn't take toys up with you each visit - make it so that whatever they do on the allotment is something they can do only on the allotment. So whatever they need to do it stays on the allotment (or at the very least, isn't available to them at home)

One of my childhood pleasures was making tracks for toy cars in a heap of gravel my parent's had never got round to spreading - far better than a sandpit because you could make tunnels that didn't collapse.

Neither o f my sons were in the slightest bit interested in gardening as children, despite my best efforts. But 25 years later one has created his own japanese style garden and 90% of his conversations with me are "how do I look after this plant?"

Thanks, I think I can really get started in making it a lovely child friendly place. A fairy garden could work well, I will try that. Leaving toys there that are 'allotment only' is a good idea too, then there's a reason to go there for them. They loved playing with a pile of stones at home last summer so would enjoy that too im sure, if I can get them there. Burying toys to dig up again is a great idea too, they love a treasure hunt. They do enjoy watering, that is probably the one activity they will do, so perhaps I'll add a water table.