Next step for a child with this profile…

Sofrustratedwithmyself · 2025-01-16T19:54:26+00:00

DS is in year 12. He’s academically average but performs terribly in exams - he isn’t even sure what happens but it’s like he draws a blank. Failed 2 GCSEs he should have passed and did ‘just ok’ in the 7 he did pass. However, he is extremely emotionally intelligent and has this way with people I just can’t describe. Really easy conversationist, engaging, lovely humour, great eye contact and just has ‘it’. Not just my opinion, but others say it regularly . He went for a job interview for a part time job today, and I vaguely know the person who interviewed him and she messaged me afterwards to say how amazing his communication skills are. We are working with him to think of next steps for him after sixth form but he just doesn’t know what he wants to do. So many jobs out there that we don’t even know exist (I had never heard of my job before I trained for it!). I wondered if anyone had some ideas they could throw out that might suit someone with his skills/academic challenges.

NuffSaidSam · 16/01/2025 19:56

What does he like/not like doing?

Something customer facing seems an obvious choice. He could make a fortune in sales by the sound of it.

Original poster

Sofrustratedwithmyself · 16/01/2025 21:04

Loves being around his friends - finds it harder to be by himself, although does need downtime.
Sport (mainly football and gym)
informal learning - would way rather learn obscure stuff by himself than learning in school. Only got a 5 at GCSE German but loves learning it himself out of school since finishing GcSEs and chatted to all the German/Austrian ski instructors in the bar when we were in Austria at Christmas.
Fantastic skier

practical work - hates being at a desk.

A levels are Busines, English lit and Sociology.

OP posts:

WaneyEdge · 16/01/2025 21:06

Ski instructor? I mean he’d probably have to move abroad but could be an option? As pp said sales/marketing sound like good fits.

Original poster

Sofrustratedwithmyself · 16/01/2025 21:12

I think he’d like to do a ski season, but not sure he’d do it as a career. We live in a great part of London, loads of access to different parts of the city but green spaces too. Understandably he loves it here and has so many friends in the area.

OP posts:

caringcarer · 16/01/2025 21:14

What about a BTEC in Sports. He'd probably make a fan coach.

Pebbles16 · 16/01/2025 21:15

I would keep him plodding on with A levels for the moment but - in the mean time - seriously look at BTECs such as customer service. Try to make a plan before the Easter holidays and "pivot" (hate that word but modern business parlance).
Plus, encourage lifelong learning such as languages and other skills.

Octavia64 · 16/01/2025 21:15

Sales.

You can make a lot of money that way.

LaPalmaLlama · 16/01/2025 21:15

Personal trainer?

RatRatPig · 16/01/2025 21:17

Personal trainer
Sales
Recruitment
Police officer

Original poster

Sofrustratedwithmyself · 16/01/2025 21:19

He’s currently doing some sports club work - he does enjoy it. Perhaps there is a career there!

police officer - hadn’t even considered that but could be a great option!

OP posts:

Pebbles16 · 16/01/2025 21:20

Sofrustratedwithmyself · 16/01/2025 21:12

I think he’d like to do a ski season, but not sure he’d do it as a career. We live in a great part of London, loads of access to different parts of the city but green spaces too. Understandably he loves it here and has so many friends in the area.

I know people who have done a ski season or two and it's been the making of them in terms of what they love and hate.
He may be young but he is showing obvious tendencies towards his preferences, go for them (if financially possible, and - if not - find a way of making it possible. My friend wanted to do summer sail and winter ski seasons, it was bloody hard work but she earned a lot of money and only gave it up because she wanted a family)

Original poster

Sofrustratedwithmyself · 16/01/2025 21:21

Pebbles16 · 16/01/2025 21:15

I would keep him plodding on with A levels for the moment but - in the mean time - seriously look at BTECs such as customer service. Try to make a plan before the Easter holidays and "pivot" (hate that word but modern business parlance).
Plus, encourage lifelong learning such as languages and other skills.

Unfortunately his sixth form only offers a couple of BTECs. He does actually enjoy his A level choices (his Business course is actually a BTEC) but I’m just worried about his exams performance. He said he really doesn’t want to go to Uni so there’s not huge pressure to get top A level results thankfully

OP posts:

Fluffyholeysocks · 16/01/2025 21:21

Events work? Particularly Sports Events?

Original poster

Sofrustratedwithmyself · 16/01/2025 21:22

Pebbles16 · 16/01/2025 21:20

I know people who have done a ski season or two and it's been the making of them in terms of what they love and hate.
He may be young but he is showing obvious tendencies towards his preferences, go for them (if financially possible, and - if not - find a way of making it possible. My friend wanted to do summer sail and winter ski seasons, it was bloody hard work but she earned a lot of money and only gave it up because she wanted a family)

Show quote history

We would definitely encourage him to do a season or 2 if he wants.

OP posts:

Original poster

Sofrustratedwithmyself · 16/01/2025 21:23

LaPalmaLlama · 16/01/2025 21:15

Personal trainer?

possibly. Where we live (London) it feels like everyone is a personal trainer!!

OP posts:

SpiritOfEcstasy · 16/01/2025 21:23

He sounds like an amazing psychotherapist/psychologist in the making. Given he’s studied sociology could he look for something working with youth perhaps?

Bimblesalong · 16/01/2025 21:29

He sounds marvellous. Have you spoken to the support team (senco) about how he blanks in exams? I wonder if he might have a processing or memory issue although doing ok with class work. This can lead to some children being overloaded in exams and blanking. Happens in class too.

Snorlaxo · 16/01/2025 21:34

He sounds like my son.

He applied to sixth form to do A-levels but ended up dropping out and starting a practical course at college (level 2 because his college don’t allow people to study level 3 without the level 2 )

Vocational subjects are regular assessment and tests which works much better from my son because it forced him to constantly work rather than gamble on a final exam. For the first time, he’s studying a subject that he voluntarily finds out more about in his free time (but needs GCSE maths, English and science which is has) and is one of the top of the class. He’s excited about the future, inspired and continually driven to find out more about different topics which is more than I hoped for from his college experience.

Original poster

Sofrustratedwithmyself · 16/01/2025 21:34

Bimblesalong · 16/01/2025 21:29

He sounds marvellous. Have you spoken to the support team (senco) about how he blanks in exams? I wonder if he might have a processing or memory issue although doing ok with class work. This can lead to some children being overloaded in exams and blanking. Happens in class too.

I have, but because he does ok they don’t seem concerned. My daughter is very dyslexic and is being assessed for autism so it is a possibility. He is a different kettle of fish to her though. He gets quite anxious and overthinks. But the positive side is he spends time analysing why he’s thinking in certain ways….hmmmmm maybe Spirit is right about being a potentially good psychologist!

and thank you for your comments. He is lovely. Just really want to support him

OP posts:

Original poster

Sofrustratedwithmyself · 16/01/2025 21:37

Fluffyholeysocks · 16/01/2025 21:21

Events work? Particularly Sports Events?

This is a good one. I think he’d like that. His executive function skills are currently really underdeveloped and he is young for his year . I’m sure they will develop eventually and maybe he would be good in planning.

OP posts:

AsmallabodeIsallweWant · 16/01/2025 21:39

Counselling

Bimblesalong · 16/01/2025 21:51

Thanks. With dyslexia in the family he may also have traits and may find working in timed conditions difficult. I see this a lot in my line of work.

Given the mismatch between daily work and exam performance it may be worth ensuring they know there is dyslexia in the family.

Some good ideas being mooted by posters and lovely to see your approach too (hope you don’t mind me saying this!).

Original poster

Sofrustratedwithmyself · 16/01/2025 21:53

Bimblesalong · 16/01/2025 21:51

Thanks. With dyslexia in the family he may also have traits and may find working in timed conditions difficult. I see this a lot in my line of work.

Given the mismatch between daily work and exam performance it may be worth ensuring they know there is dyslexia in the family.

Some good ideas being mooted by posters and lovely to see your approach too (hope you don’t mind me saying this!).

Edited

It’s nice to hear someone say it. I doubt myself as a parent even though I put so much effort in. Never know if we’re doing too much for them or not enough. Mothers’ guilt!

OP posts:

Original poster

Sofrustratedwithmyself · 16/01/2025 22:01

NuffSaidSam · 16/01/2025 19:56

What does he like/not like doing?

Something customer facing seems an obvious choice. He could make a fortune in sales by the sound of it.

I think he’d make a really good large retail store manager (like John Lewis for example) but not sure he’s keen 😆

OP posts:

NuffSaidSam · 16/01/2025 22:59

If he likes kids/young people he could be a great teacher/youth worker/sports coach.

I'd try not to worry too much about long term goals at this point. If he'd enjoy something like being a ski instructor, that's enough for now. It takes him from just after A-level results through to the spring and then maybe...holiday rep for a season? He doesn't need to know what he's going to do at 40 right away. Ime people who love their jobs are often the ones who took some time to try different things and discover it organically.