Year 12 - 2024/25 - Support, Discussion and Looking After Each Other

[BlackBean2023]

A survival thread for Y12 parents (24/25) now that GCSEs are over and our young people move onto KS5

Subject choices going well so far, wk2 and getting into the swing of things academically. Is anyone else's child finding it hard to occupy themselves during lunch/free periods? DS has not stayed in school for any free periods yet. He either comes home or leaves to go for a walk with a friend (they already know each other). Am slightly worried that he will struggle to make new friends if he doesn't stay on the premises... He had high hopes for making a new crowd of friends but it isn't happening yet...
When i suggest him staying he flies off the handle, he's obviously a bit stressed and anxious...

@optimisticvibes Mine isn’t allowed off-campus in Y12 (that’s a Y13 privilege) but I think they encourage them to be in the library in free periods and then socialise at lunchtime. I’m sure your DS will find his way, and even if he is outwardly scoffing at your wise advice it will have registered somewhere. Deep down!

It's interesting how schools and colleges treat free periods. My DD's school 6th form requires them to be in 8:30-2pm. They can only leave the school premises in the 5th (or 6th) period - only if those are free periods.

In DS's school 6th formers get lunch last (after Senior School), so they all spend lunchtime lethargic and hangry. Or maybe just DS.

DD spends her free periods with her friends and they often go into town. She’s still bored shitless though! First piece of homework today and she did it in her free period so that’s something I guess. She can leave any time she wants which is good I think, she came home at 1015 today and made me some cookies 😜

Just popping in to sympathise with those whose DCs are unsure about topics. A daily topic of discussion for us here - DS is unsure whether to do English lit or RS. We asked him to try Lit out seeing he got a strong 9 in GCSE, and he enjoys it. It's a small class with the best English teacher in the school, he's giving it a go. However he is very keen on RS too as philosophy is a top degree option, and he cant see himself dropping it. He's got Maths and Psychology otherwise so he can branch out to either philosophy or Psychology, or something combining both, at uni. Dilemma!

I think it's a good exercise though for them to weigh the pros and cons, speak to their teachers and start making their own decisions. I'm trying to step back this year and let him step up (had to be very involved last year with ADHD diagnosis, access arrangements with the school, and general revision support). However no sign of homework at home so far - says he does it all in free periods and every spare hour is spent in the gym! Hope he has the right judgment, otherwise I guess he will find out soon enough...

Really helpful to get an insight into everyone's experience on here. Great support!

We've also got ongoing subject dilemmas! Here DS is considering swapping DT for economics to go alongside maths/FM and physics. Either one looks sensible to me, but I think economics might be better because if he drops FM he is left with 3 solid a levels without the 50% coursework of DT which is going to be total drain of his time in year 13. I've been told he will make a decision tomorrow! We shall see.

He has to be in from 8:30 to 15:30 every day with a half day on Friday and Friday morning is all free periods. So apparently he has been saving up his homework so he has something to do tomorrow!

Well dd was much happier today, she had a good maths lesson and felt she understood better than some others and was able to help the really clever girl next to her. It’s quite the rollercoaster! She answered questions in class in economics, which takes a bit of courage for her, she’s fairly introverted, and she asked her tutor about changing her timetable. So we’re going to see what next week brings but I’ve a much happier child today than yesterday.

At dd college lunches are staggered and cafe is always open, one of her friends has made a spreadsheet of timetables so they can all work out who’s around at the same time! I think they mostly stay on site, but as predicted there is a shortage of work spaces in the library, they’re thinking about finding a cheap cafe in town with wifi for free periods. Enrichment starts next week so hopefully pressure on library will start to ease a bit then.

we've had our first friendship wobble.

dd started a new college with no friends, fresh start after bullying and friendship issues. But she had a really close friend out of school last year, who goes to same college. In August they had a massive falling out, and now don't speak.

Today dd was sitting talking to someone to get to know them and this ex-friend came up and joined the chat. dd went silent, and then it was time to go to next lesson. She said ex-friend and potential new friend were exchanging social media stuff and dd feels bereft.

I know why it is hitting so hard, this is what her bully did, every time she made a new friend the bully would get to know them and turn them against dd. It was so bad that school had to make her (the bully) sign a behaviour pact about not doing it.

So trying to reassure dd, early days, lots of time ot make friends, just get to know people, don't bare your soul on first meeting.
lots of tears tonight. Which I think is actually because everything is new and it is stressfull, and she is trying to be positive and pro-active and on top of everything. I thought sixth form might be a bit easier.... (for me !)

Oh dear @steppemum - it’s not easy is it? We’re finding it a bit like the transition to Y7 - complete with all the newness and social angst - but with extra potentially life-changing decisions on top!

@steppemum thats really hard, I think you’ve given her good advice though. It’s such a big transition, my dd has had some teary moments lately as well.

@wonderstuff and @steppemum I totally feel for you, at this age we are open to knowing all about our DDs feelings and worries but unable to do very much practically. I had a few days when every time a message from DD popped up on screen my heart sunk, not wanting to read the contents.

I could have literally written your posts Wonderstuff, including the better day one! My DDs better days have carried on all week so far, I am silently praying we have turned a corner, but know better how quickly things change in a day 😂.

Steppemum, we had those tears (and a few rants at DH and I) too, I agree patience and time will undoubtedly improve things but it is hard to think that far forward in their position I suppose. I really hope your DD has a better day today and that the ex friend keeps away

Your poor daughters. I hope things settle for them soon and that they make some decent friends who aren't fair weather. It always seems harder for girls (sweeping generalisation of course).

DS hasn't made any friends yet either, but (another sweeping generalisation) boys just seem to join a sports team and have an instant set of acquaintances to grunt at in the cafeteria. DS has joined as a newbie to an existing cohort so is finding that quite difficult - everyone else has known each other for five years and he is a stranger.

It's early days for them all - they will find their people in the next couple of weeks I hope

Things seem to be going ok for DS here - they’ve been going over old content in his maths classes, but it sounds like they’ve jumped right in with the hard brain-expanding content in physics! And he’s really enjoying Economics. Not that much in the way of homework yet. But we’ve managed to move his driving theory test forward, it’s now a week away (he turned 17 this week), so he’s trying to learn all of that content quickly! First driving lesson on Sunday.

He had good news too, he’s been accepted onto a competitive in-office work experience week over October half term as an introduction to finance and accountancy, he had to pass a few online assessments to get it. Should give him a good idea of whether he’d like that kind of work - he flits between the idea of finance or engineering at the moment.

So sorry for those of your DCs going through the friendship issues. I was bullied aged 15 and had to change schools in a rush it was so bad. I recognise the bullying techniques described here. i lost all my friends one by one. But I then met lovely people who helped put me back together and I am sure this will happen to your DCs too, and 6th form is the place for this! New blood, young people growing into their own, and there will be some mature, kind and thoughtful kids in there. Hang in there!

Sorry to hear about the DDs having issues with friends! It's a nightmare had it for years with DD.
DS is enjoying college 6th form doing ALevel Accounts Geography Business Studies and core Maths they also do 3 hrs of enrichment he had chosen hockey but that has stopped as not enough kids so swapping to athletics. Was worried about the size but information evening last week was very good. He missed a hockey class as forgot his stuff and was signed up to chat with tutor nrxt day so they are def keeping in touch with kids.

We are also looking at getting him driving as soon as possible 3 hrs a day travelling and has to catch 2 buses.

@Tebheag that is a long commute for your DS! You probably know this already but with the driving it is really worth booking a practical driving test as soon as they pass their theory as it is quite a bunfight getting a test date. DD has one booked for Feb half term - if she’s not ready then (or is ready sooner) then her instructor will look at swapping her date with another pupil, but at least she is in the system.

DD ended the week well, with a spontaneous Friday evening outing with new 6th form friends. Phew.

Hi 👋 jumping across from the gcse board. After some advice if anyone can help. DD has started a level 2 health and social care course but second week in has asked if she can study something else alongside it such as travel and tourism as she really does not know what to do. I have said speak to college on Monday and see what they say but have stressed she is on a full time course so not too sure what will be able to be slotted in. Have said she could do this for a year then maybe another level 2 in travel and tourism the year after then decide where she would like to go? Or maybe apprenticeships would suit? Any ideas anyone? She said she wants to get the most out of college

To add she has a progress monitor contact Shayne with daughters permission I may contact her but either way daughter is off to student services on Monday to see what she can do. They do have a couple of days free time even though full time course so maybe enrichment stuff may be good. Will have a chat with her. And really trying to get her a part time Saturday job which would help kill some time. Problem being she likes the students on the course but is finding the course itself not very interesting.

Highly unlikely to be able to study 2 L2 BTEC diplomas. They, as you said, are full time courses. Timetables will clash too much.
With spare time a part time job / work experience could be good.
(I have set up a vocational courses thread if you would like to join in, my DD2 is on a level 2, and DD1 did L3 Travel&Tourism too.)

It may not be too late to switch courses. Some colleges are more flexible than others. Is she resitting maths and/or English too?

@Midnightstar76 Workload may increase when they start setting assignments too. I don't know how much 'in class,' time they will have for them v doing at home. (Some things have to be fobe in more controlled conditions).

Thanks @TeenToTwenties she passed English language with a 5 and got a 4 for English Literature. She does have to re-take her Maths. Thanks for the thread will hop on that. 🙂 I think she just needs to chat with someone at college and they can guide her. I have suggested that they do some good enrichment things like drama and sign language she could get involved with. I think though if she really wants to try and switch and give up health and social care then she should if it isn’t what she thought it would be.

@JessyCarr thank you he is booked for a week course in October half term for basics got a driving instructor lined up next not looked into theory yet. He is 17 start of November Would only be about 30mins if he drives to college. He was lucky to have two choices one was walkable but choose college as wanted to do ALevel Accounts.