Year 13 2024 - General support thread part 2

[Rollergirl11]

All welcome as our young people head in to their last full term before the summer exams. Between UCAS applications, receiving offers/rejections, learning to drive and taking driving tests, revising for mocks and sitting them the pace hasn’t let up for our DC.

This thread has been a lovely supportive and immensely helpful place to talk as we guide our DC’s through this challenging time!

Old thread here https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/further_education/4851165-year-13-20232024-general-support-thread?page=40&reply=132323436

Well DD just got an offer from Birmingham for Geography!

UCAS only went in couple of weeks ago, just in time for the deadline - and while she applied for three Veterinary nursing places, she has decided she doesn't want to go to somewhere that is too isolated, so stuck down two Geography applications for her two other choices at the places she thought she would like to be at (Birmingham and Leeds - although she has visited neither, but they are not London, are biggish cities and she knows people who want to go there). I was a bit sceptical given that her personal statement is all about Veterinary nursing that they would even look at her. She is has been enjoying the Geography the most of all her subjects and she did manage an A both in her mock and at the end of Year 12. But it was really a very last minute decision to put these choices down, and I am not sure how committed to Geography she really is.

Going to be a bit of a dilemma I suspect. Favorite is Bristol veterinary nursing (although she has to get her supplementary form in pronto) which has the best of both worlds, ie the course she wants to do, with the university experience she wants (but is, I gather, very competitive), but the other two veterinary nursing options she has put down don't properly give her the university experience she has seen her DB having. On the other hand, she has had her heart set on veterinary nursing for so long, and I do worry that doing a degree just because you want the university experience and loading yourself up with loads of debt in the process is not so sensible. Geography offer is at her predicted grades, and pretty much in line with her mocks (Biology she told me she got a B - but she also said she managed to miss a full page spread on one of the exams - presumably turned the pages too quickly - which makes that result seem too good for missing a whole page, - her other subject she got an A* for two papers but doesn't know the results yet for the third).

She applied for a deferred place (ie on the UCAS form for 2025), so she will have time to think about it I guess. Anybody know if Birmingham has Offer holder days for subjects like Geography?

I suspect that deciding if she actually wants to be a veterinary nurse is a higher priority than checking out the accom at Birmingham.

It is a big decision and should based on something more sensible than assesssments of social life opportunities for three years. Where are the VN courses? I am imagine the students there have some fun too?

Equally, if she really has decided she doesn't want to be a V nurse anymore, she shouldn't feel tied to it just because she had wanted to for a while, possibly settling on it when young and less able to assess it.

The problem is this. Take the RVC course. There are 50 Veterinary nurse places on a rural campus 25 minutes commute from Potters Bar. Even the Veterinary medics don't go there until their third year (the first two years are in Camden), so her social group would be 50 Veterinary nurses and that is it. They have to travel into central London for most social events, and with the RVC anyway there is not as much as one of the big universities, but it is more the commuting to do anything. There is a regular shuttle bus to Potter's bar, and then the train, that is how you get anywhere.
Middlesex (London) is very close to where we live, and she really wants to leave home, and not be around everybody she knows. The other Middlesex veterinary nursing campuses - one is 30 minutes or so out of Leeds, and the other I think about a similar distance outside Cambridge. ie completely rural, and very little university life as it is an isolated campus just dedicated to rural things.
Nottingham Trent the course is also located on a rural campus around that kind of commute from Nottingham (although at least they also have a campus actually bang in the middle of Nottingham, so they put on a regular commuter bus into that campus), but she would have to choose between living on the rural campus (with the veterinary nurses and a few others doing animal related courses) or living in Nottingham proper and commuting. In addition, the Nottingham Trent course is only a foundation degree (although you can do an additional year top up after that to get a proper degree). For somebody whose predicted grades are AAB, it does feel a bit odd, but she has applied there anyway.
There are even more rural options (eg in the middle of nowhere in Scotland) that she didn't bother applying for. There are only something like 11 Veterinary nursing schools, and only Bristol has them (for the first two years) anywhere near lots of other students. The Bristol course has them for the first two years in Bristol proper, commuting one day a week to the rural campus by shuttle bus. The last two years the course is based on the rural campus, but apparently around 50% continue to live in Bristol and commute (we asked at an open day), and again, there are regular shuttle buses put on by the university because so many of their students are going back and forth. Hence Bristol being the stand out favorite, but very competitive.
So it is not just about prioritising accommodation, it is about the whole university experience for the entire time that she is there. If she is going to feel miserable and isolated the whole time, is she going to be able to stick out four years even if it is the subject that she really, really wants? That is a lot to ask. Maybe she is safer doing Geography even though she is not nearly as passionate about it.

That sounds like a tricky one @Naem and it’s very good it’s deferred for a year. I think she sounds like she needs more time to weigh it all up once exams are out of the way. Applying with grades in hand is much less stressful as well.

Another night, another Travelodge! And another roadworks heavy journey under our belts. Between University visits and DS's sports commitments I seem to be living in budget hotels at the moment.
Loughborough offer holders' day tomorrow. DS doesn't think he wants to go there as he really wants a city University but it's very well regarded for his course so I'm insisting he gives it serious consideration before he commits to anything.We'll see!

Hope Loughborough offer holder day went well yesterday @MrsAvocet.

It’s half term for us after tomorrow. DD has mocks directly after. She also has History coursework due in tomorrow so quite bad timing really. She hasn’t been able to do as much revision so far as she would have liked because of having to get her coursework in. History teacher said to them that their coursework is more important than their mocks as it’s going towards their actual grade.

DD hasn’t been well the last few days either and had to take 2 days off college. She still managed to get her work done from home but I think she’s starting to feel the pressure a little bit and she started crying last night out of nowhere.

@Rollergirl11 coursework and mocks sounds really tough without her being ill as well. Really hope things ease up for her and she feels better soon.

Fingers crossed I am not speaking too soon, but no homework seems to have been set for any of my son’s subjects for half-term possibly as the coursework deadline is first Monday after half-term for everything. It will be good to get the coursework finished and be able to start at least planning revision.

Hope everyone manages a bit of rest this half term. We are well and truly limping towards it.

Mocks are horrible aren’t they. They always seem to come at the wrong time and either spoil Christmas or Half Term. Half-term is such a short revision window too.
In the end, although Mocks are important and success in them builds confidence, at least they don’t determine predicted grades or count for anything, so I agree that an NEA should be priority. At least it sounds like the NEA deadline isn’t the start of mocks - that would be very badly planned.

We had an NEA deadline before Christmas and one after half term. Mocks were after a Christmas. I think there are some sort of mocks after Easter too but perhaps not the full lot at that stage. Every holiday is taken up with prepping for something, but there does seem to be an attempt to not have everything happening at once. That long summer is looking very appealing now.

I am going to book a Christmas show for when DS returns from wherever he ends up.

We also feel like we're limping towards half term but ours is the week after next! Actually DS has a short week next week and finishes on Wed but then straight after half term he has mocks. No lessons that week just going in for the exams. I think he feels like the summer exams are still a long way off but with Easter being so early this year I'm sure it will come around quicker than he expects.

Hope your DD feels much better soon @Rollergirl11 So glad my DS is not doing any subjects with coursework, he really struggled with the one subject which had coursework at GCSE. Exams suit him much better.

Hope everyone manages to have a rest in half term and if it's next week maybe eat some pancakes?!

Thanks @Rollergirl11
It sounds almost sacreligious saying it as Loughborough is so well reknowned for DS's intended course...but we weren't blown away. There was nothing wrong with it. The course sounds great, the facilities are excellent, the students we met were bright and engaged, the staff were friendly and helpful. Objectively, it should be everything he wants. But DS just didn't fall in love with it. I think it's mainly the campus lifestyle that doesn't appeal to him. It felt a bit insular to me too as I went to a city centre University. We both came away feeling similar - if it was his only option he'd be happy to go there but he wasn't filled with a burning desire to go like he was after visiting Strathclyde.
I feel a bit guilty in a strange way. More or less everyone we know - school teachers, sports coaches, my DH's colleagues (he's an engineer) - has assumed Loughborough would be DS's first choice. I mean what sports obsessed aspiring engineer wouldn't choose there? And chatting to the other parents yesterday everyone else seemed to be sure it was their DC's first choice by a long way and were raving about how much they loved it. Some are holding offers on more than one course because they want to go there so badly. Whereas I was more "yes, it's quite nice isn't it..." than "wow, I would sell my soul for a place here". I feel a bit bad because I know that even getting an offer and having the chance to go is something many of DS's friends, particularly the sporty ones, would kill for, yet here he is about to say "thanks but no thanks". And there is kudos to having a Loughborough degree in the industry he wants to work in, it's undeniable. But equally, I don't want him to accept the offer just because everyone thinks he should. And Strathclyde is also a good choice with a strong reputation and excellent industry links.
Nice problem to have I know...I shouldn't moan...but it's still a worry!
Half term next week too, with lots of sport for DS. I think that having some time out will be good for him. Get well wishes to all who are under the weather

@MrsAvocet I absolutely hear you. It’s so important that DS makes that choice for himself - he knows what he’ll be happy with. My DS would have been bored halfway through Y2 with anything other than a big city to explore: I think I knew this more than him before he applied. Similarly we have visited so many unis with DD and she’s been meh about them all, except one, when her face lit up. Offer holder day imminent and then hopefully firm choice made. Still waiting on one offer that may end up being her insurance.

What is the extreme of limping to half term? That’s DD. She’s metaphorically on crutches, panting and wheezing! Two more days. She is being so rude to me it’s starting to make me think she might finally be ready to leave home!

Half term for us next week too...although school shut at 2pm today due to snow & there's a question mark about opening tomorrow - either way for DS it is all about finishing his History NEA.

@Rollergirl11 it's so tough seeing our DCs like this, DS was in a similar position in the run up to & during his mocks, with illness & the NEA deadlines coinciding. I think it's right that the NEA is the priority but they are being pulled in so many different directions.

@MrsAvocet your update illustrates why it's so important to visit the universities, it's a bit like buying a house...your heart has got to be in it!

Wishing everyone approaching half term a calm break with some relaxation.

Half term for us too next week. DS is a peer mentor for sciences at school which means he tutors junior pupils who are struggling a bit. He has a mentee in year 7 that he sees once a week to tutor in Science and he was very proud to report that since September this child has improved by two grades! It's good for him to have that responsibility and for the younger pupils too to be taught by another pupil - DS can sometimes explain it in a more accessible way.

This half term seems to have flown by. Not much formal teaching left really. Scary.

@MrsAvocet yep I was surprised my DD walked away from Exeter open day with a firm 'no'. Not so surprised she didn't like Bristol either but it meant choices narrowed down quite a bit. She didn't fill her fifth slot til January 30th (LSE, definitely a wild card).
@Rollergirl11 I remember that history coursework deadline! I'm sure an all nighter was involved despite the teacher having them do first drafts a month earlier! And feeling poorly makes things twice as hard - it was during mocks last year that my DD's symptoms really came out leading to her MS diagnosis last April. Your DD will get through it (an offer from D would help)!
My DD will miss half term as she's on her work experience in Portugal (so tough I know!). They still have to get their coursework done and I think she might have rushed it a bit before she left. She's doing the social media for a women's art cooperative and the scheme that arranges the placements so says she's very busy but enjoying it. 15 of them made taco dinner last night - foretaste of uni living! Weather not great (rained there too) but warmer.

Absolutely agree that our DCs have to choose where to go, regardless of our thoughts as 'much more experienced ' (ahem) adults. I would never have thought of DS's choices for Art, not in a million years, but this is his focus and if he loves his choices (in particular his first choice) then it's the best place to aim for (grades and portfolio notwithstanding).

My son has only visited Cambridge and Oxford universities before application - but has been to both Durham and Exeter in the past. Offer days were always the plan as I thought they would be a bit less busy. Alas still no devision from Durham, but he went on an informal visit yesterday and really enjoyed it. Exeter offer day is booked for March including an overnight at the Premier Inn as the activities start before the first train from London gets in. Will probably book Leeds soon as it may end up as his insurance and i will try and persuade him to visir UCL. He is insistent that he attends these alone as we would only slow him down!

Good news on his history mock - it turns out he got an A star after all as the teacher had entered his mark as 17 rather than 27 out of 30 for one of the questions. It was quite a relief when he finally got this question back on Thursday as he thought he must have done really badly on it given the rest were pretty strong. They were only tested on last years units, first full run through of this years unit is in mid March. It will be his longest exam at 2.5 hours so hopefully the fear at this will help keep the complacency of getting great mock results with very little revision at bay.

Gah. Went to offer holder day yesterday and it was wonderful. DD was sure it was the one.

Then today she got a really lovely email from the other one that’s in contention.

Now she’s not sure again.

Its v hard - one is her gut feel of where she thinks she’d be happy. The other is a slightly better course with better options and is a bit higher up the league tables.

I think the gut feel will win out but it’s a real heart over head decision…..

And added into the mix DS has just received a list of where he can apply for a semester abroad next year. Again, there isn’t an easy “that’s the one!”

Gah. 🤯

So much going on for everyone! Hope some rest too. Limping along here, with ds now ill and it feels like he won't have much choice of offers- even the lowest is way above his his mock grades. It feels crushing after all these years of hard work. Hopefully he isn't as depressed as his parents!

@aramox1 - did he work hard for his mocks? My ds got ABC but his teachers still expect him to achieve his 3A predictions - he just needs to put the hard work in. We've been given analyses of his mocks performances so know areas of strength and weakness and are focussing on the latter.

What does your school/college say? They must think that he's capable of the higher grades. It's a very stressful time for sure.

Ahhh @aramox1 remember that mocks are just mocks and not the real thing! He still has plenty of time to get his head in the game and get his revision and technique on point. Have his teachers given constructive feedback? DD got AAB in her last set of mocks in November but teachers at her parents evening say she is still on track for 2xA* A and hopefully even get the 3rd A star. She has her next lot of mocks directly after half term but has only really been able to revise this week as she had History NEA deadline before half term. So these mock results might not be any better but my point is that she knows what she needs to do for the real thing and so is trying not to get hung up on mock grades.

@aramox1 a lot of students will be in this position - my DS messed up with timing & I'm pretty sure will be in a similar position when he gets his results next week (bizarrely school are doing a full on 'mock results day' with results on a board etc). But this is the point of the mocks, DS hadn't done a full exam since June 2023 & it will help them know how to focus their efforts in the next few weeks, whether that is content or technique. Hard not to worry I know but hold your nerve & trust the school & your DS to use the results in a constructive way...

Back to school for us this morning for 2nd half of DC’s penultimate term.

DD has mocks this week. 6 exams in 5 days so just one exam short of the real thing in the summer. Tomorrow is her worst day with 5.5 hours of exam. All writing so she’s going to get hand cramp that’s for sure.

But she has all of her offers in now and she is thankful to get her offer from Durham now rather than spend another few months with uncertainty.