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Further education

You'll find discussions about A Levels and universities on our Further Education forum.

Changing college during y12

3 replies

AlanTheGoat · 05/01/2024 17:43

Hoping for some advice regarding my daughter who is 16 and in term 2 of year 12.

She is really unhappy at college, she went to a school without a 6th form and chose a small 6th form attached to a different school, so the majority of students all went to school together and she is struggling to make friends. She has a good group of friends outside of college and was popular throughout secondary school. It’s breaking my heart to see her so sad every day, she feels lonely and like an outsider all the time. She’s tried going to social events run by the college but she says she just sits alone.

She is upset with me for encouraging her to stick it out and asks me multiple times a week if she can move. I’ve explained that she will be under even more stress trying to catch up on three months worth of a levels or alternatively will have to re-sit the first year (I think this is more likely).

Does anyone have similar experience? I’d love some advice.

OP posts:
Bunnyannesummers · 07/01/2024 21:05

If she’s really unhappy she should leave. Desperately unhappy kids don’t tend to do very well in their exams.

At this point in the year there is a vanishingly small chance of moving, so she’ll need to restart y12 in September. Open days at sixth form and college should be happening this month, so get her to those, see where she’d be happy, what the social options are. Make it empowering for her, rather than any kind of failure.

DarkChocHolic · 07/01/2024 21:12

Sorry to hear this OP.
Y12 is a lot of stress even without all the friendship issues.
Have you spoken to current school about the problems she is having?
They may have some ideas.
It is a tricky time to move colleges without losing a year. Are there any other schools or colleges she could move that offer the same subjects?
You are right that there is no guarantee she will make friends in the new place.
If this was y7 or y8 I would say move without hesitation as it is a long time to be unhappy.

Have a chat with her, speak to current school and maybe visit a few other options for her to get a feel.
If she is willing to restart the year in September then it means she is serious.
Remind her that there are not many months left in the course.. before you realise, it will be time for mocks and predicted grades and uni applications etc.
What is she planning to do after 18?
Does she have goals? Maybe make a list of future goals, personal goals, fun goals etc and see if that takes her mind off.
How is she coping with the studies?
If she is managing fine then that's even less of a reason to move.

I know it's hard for you to watch her unhappy.
It's very hard to sit back and do nothing.
I hope you find a way out.
Look after yourself too.
Xx

Billyandharry · 20/05/2024 20:39

My daughter switched colleges half way thru a levels. So much happier at current college. Good luck. x

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