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Further education

You'll find discussions about A Levels and universities on our Further Education forum.

Ds 18 lost and miserable after AS level results.

47 replies

BlastedPimples · 15/08/2023 08:31

Ds has already repeated year 12 because last year he got two Es and a U in his AS levels. He's 18 now.

This year he has got three Ds.

I mean there is improvement - I had hoped for a lot more improvement - but I really don't know if he should continue and neither does he. We aren't sure if the school will even take him on for his final year.

He's so depressed. So lost. Doesn't even really like doing two of the levels he's chosen.

Is there any advice you could give me as to what he could do in light of these grades? AS levels aren't really useful for anything, are they, other than an indication of progress halfway through the A level course?

OP posts:
YellowJoggers · 15/08/2023 08:46

Does he have maths and English GCSEs?

A Levels aren't the be all and end all and aren't for everyone, particularly if he is not enjoying them.

Has he looked into FE colleges or apprenticeships? Or going straight into the workplace?

It may not seem like it but he does have lots of options.

SushiSuave · 15/08/2023 08:51

I agree that you should look at college instead. Clearly a levels are a stretch too far for him and he should study something he enjoys in a way that allows him to gain the qualification. He needs to work out what it is he wants to do as a career and then make relevant choices.

Ohthatsabitshit · 15/08/2023 08:56

It’s awful for him but you and I know it’s not an indication of what his life will be. He needs to take a big breath and think what might interest him to do next year? Does he want to keep going? Would he prefer to work for a year or travel? Could he find another course that he would enjoy doing? Good things are coming.

Xrays · 15/08/2023 08:59

College and / or apprenticeship surely.

A levels are not the be all and end all. It really isn’t the end of the world, I would just reassure him and look at a completely different path.

Mumdiva99 · 15/08/2023 08:59

Take the stress off him. He doesnt need to decide his future now. He can finish school. Get a job for a year and decide what is best. Maybe some space to decide what he enjoys would be beneficial.

PinkPomegranite · 15/08/2023 08:59

I would advise wait until he gets his official results and then talk to his school about whether they advise he carries on but have a look before Thursday at any other options locally such as FE college and see if there are any courses he would prefer. He should be able to contact them next week onwards as other students enrol.

My DD started AS last year but decided not to continue onto A level as she found the exams too stressful, she's enrolled on a BTEC extended diploma in a similar subject area. Something like that might suit your DS better?

youhavenoidea123 · 15/08/2023 09:00

Could he speak to college about level 3 BTec or T Levels. Also look for an apprenticeship (even if he starts at level 2).

www.gov.uk/apply-apprenticeship

He would be better doing this than slogging A Levels and getting low grades.

IncompleteSenten · 15/08/2023 09:01

Does he need to do them?
Maybe his talents lie elsewhere.
A levels etc aren't the only path.

APintOfWine11 · 15/08/2023 09:02

I was the same as your DS at 18 and felt really low and disillusioned with education at the time. Went and volunteered at a homeless shelter, used it to gain experience, then joined the probation service as a PSO. In my day things were slightly different, but now there’s an internal progression route to complete a degree and qualify as a probation officer.

All achievable with just GCSE’s and incredibly rewarding. It gave me a good break from studying until I felt ready again.

What A levels was he doing? Any idea what he might like to do career wise long term?

Delphigirl · 15/08/2023 09:05

Find out what he actually enjoys - working with his hands - the outdoors - gaming - sports statistics - whatever and then think what job he could do in that field and how can he get there. For example if he is organised and numerate and street smart just not academic he could try and a job as an underwriters assistant and work his way into the insurance industry that way. Or get a school leavers job as a junior barristers clerk. Or train for a trade - electrician, plumber. Or do cyber security courses. Or look at landscape jobs and do a later mature degree in golf course management. All of these will enable him in the future to earn 80-100 or more. But he needs to do something he thinks he might enjoy and will play to his strengths.

YellowJoggers · 15/08/2023 09:08

Having a look at something like https://www.notgoingtouni.co.uk/opportunities or searching for 'school leavers' opportunities might give you both an idea of what's out there.

100% agree with PP saying to take the pressure off. There is lots of time and even lots of alternative routes into further education at a later date should he decide he wants to pursue that later.

Seen too many kids demoralized and beaten down by the standard route through the education system when it's really not for everyone.

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notquitesoyoung · 15/08/2023 09:12

What were his GCSE results and did he sit the exams/is there any other context other than general covid times? One bad set of AS results on it's own probably doesn't say much but 2 plus GCSE grades should give a more accurate picture as to whether A levels are the correct pathway. Would BTEC be a better route for him? I actively sought an alternative for DS to A levels knowing they just weren't right for his temperament and he came out with BTEC results which far exceeding anything he would have achieved at A level. Are you based in the UK and is DS at a private school given they are still doing AS's. Personally I was pleased to see the widespread scraping of AS for everyone's sake - they mean 3 consecutive proper exam years with all the pressure that brings for the student and family, it takes it's toll on everyone. Y12 internal exams are obviously important but having another set of external exams is just too much IMO.

TheMousePipes · 15/08/2023 09:13

What does he enjoy doing?
Did he choose his a levels because they interested him or was it more three things that weren’t too bad so he could continue on the expected path?

PrivateSchoolTeacherParent · 15/08/2023 09:20

Sorry to hear about the situation. If you're looking for advice, it would be helpful to know which education system you're in? Presumably not England, as AS results aren't out yet.

Moopyhereagain · 15/08/2023 09:24

son 1 was in a similar position, good GCSEs , pants A levels - got on a foundation degree with fewer points than 3 Es, he’s flying now , got his degree ( in outdoor leadership, not a great uni but he made the most of it) and is running his own outdoor adventure business 6 years on from a dark results day! Would suggest leave A levels and college behind, get him on something through clearing. Will probably need to follow own advice for son 2 results due Thursday!

OhBeAFineGuyKissMe · 15/08/2023 09:28

I’m a bit confused.

Do you mean school internal grades?

He can’t know his grades if he sat external exams as those results aren’t out until Thursday.

To be able to help - what subjects is he doing, does he know what he wants to do, how did he get on with his GCSEs?

nearlyemptynes · 15/08/2023 09:28

What were his GCSE results? What does he want to do for employment? Is there another route?

CornishGem1975 · 15/08/2023 09:29

AS grades aren't out yet are they? I thought results day was Thursday. That's when DD gets here anyway!

Wibbleswombat · 15/08/2023 09:31

Tell him to solve for another solution.

I kept trying to do maths things, failed AS, an A Level, managed a D at resit, got into Uni...struggled in the 1st year, nearly got kicked out, did eventually get a degree but terrible for my confidence.

Few years later, found what I was good at and went back to Uni, got a 1st.

He needs to find something else but he might need a break first. Different environment, different people, maybe a job for a while?

Wenfy · 15/08/2023 09:36

What does he want to do? In most professions A Level grades don’t matter, just the fact that you took them. It’s your degree result that counts.

Mariposista · 15/08/2023 09:37

Not everyone is academic. There are so many jobs out there that don't require A Levels or a uni degree. I feel so sorry for young people who are conditioned by society to think they have failed if they don't go down this route.

thereisnorightanswer · 15/08/2023 09:37

There are some things to consider:

  • Were there any extenuating circumstances as to why he underperformed? Personal issues? (Did he find the pandemic years harder to cope with than he let on? Any bereavements? Fall outs with friends?)
  • Did he fare any better at GCSE level, or were these kind of grades entirely predictable? (If he was never going to do well academically, it might be time to cut his losses with book education.)
  • Does he panic in an exam scenario, or are the grades reflective of what he would achieve if doing the work at home without an invigilator and all the pressure? (If it's exam technique, that's a different thing altogether and something that can be tackled.)
  • Does he actually enjoy the subjects he has sat? (Even the smartest students struggle to achieve if they hate the subject.)
  • Is there any chance he might have an undiagnosed neurodiversity? (Could it be a case he didn't have the adjustments he needed to perform?)

Once you've worked your way through all of the questions, if you can't find a way to explain his grades that can be solved, you're left with the conclusion that your son might not be particularly academic. If that's the case, yes, it closes some doors, but that's not a bad thing.

Everyone has different strengths (focus on the strengths and not the weaknesses!) so if he's not academic, chances are, he's great at something else. The trick is to figure out what that something else is, and to explore alternative career routes which utilise those skills.

It can be difficult to figure out what you want to do in this world, so actually, having some of that choice narrowed down on grades is a hidden blessing.

Being lost at 18 is not the end of the world. Plenty of people fall into a career they hate because they tick the boxes for it, then find themselves lost at 28, 38, 48... Your son is going to take some time to properly think about it, because the circumstances are forcing him to, and that may well turn out to be a gift in the future.

Sending you support, OP. Your son clearly struggled the first time round and resat - might not have been the results either of you wanted, but he's shown determination and resilience in giving it a go. There's something to celebrate there.

MariaVT65 · 15/08/2023 09:38

I did A levels to get into uni. After that, no one every asked about my A levels but they still asked about my gcses. So unless he really wanted to go to uni, it’s not a great loss.

I actually went to work in a call centre after uni and worked my way up in the company. Still don’t use my degree. There are plenty of avenues to explore :)

WalnutBlue · 15/08/2023 09:40

I got good a levels but dropped out of uni as i realised the course (nursing) wasn't right for me.
Ironically I now work in the NHS but in a different sector.
Same for my dh who has gone from band 3 to band 6 in his line of work.
There's options other than Uni, you can go straight into work or work your way up, apprenticeships/trades, btec courses.
Also for maths I did the open university c grade equivalent course.

Piggywaspushed · 15/08/2023 09:57

I, too, am confused. How does he know what grades he has got?

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