Post GCSE’s 2022 - Year 12 2022/23 General support thread

[Rollergirl11]

This is a thread for supporting all young people post GCSEs 2022, regardless of their educational setting.
Our DC’s may continue down various pathways ( employment, apprenticeships, higher ed)
Everyone is welcome!

I've considered just showing up, but a)I am a rule follower to an almost pathological degree and the thought of doing that makes me feel extremely anxious b) DH would be even more annoyed if we spend hours in the car then couldn't get in so it's a risky strategy from that point of view. And c)I think DS probably does need to face the consequences of his idiocy. If we go anyway, get in and he gets what he wanted despite his stupid behaviour it will be "See, you were worried about nothing Mum, it didn't matter". And actually it does matter because if he doesn't read important communications and take required actions one day it will be something more important than a University open day that he misses and there won't be an easy way out. I'm actually more annoyed with him about his attitude than the actual mistake so I'm inclined to let things unfold now. He is generally a very affable, easy going young man but he does have this tendency to blame other people or circumstances for his own errors sometimes and he needs to grow out of that. So if he has to slink into school somewhat embarrassed next Weds and do the online session in his own time instead it maybe isn't a bad thing. I'm still disappointed as I was actually looking forward to a nice family day out, but that ship has sailed I think!

Shame, but understandable @MrsAvocet

In a similar rule following vein, one Open Day is specifying student+maximum of 1 guest only. However it's one of DD's top choices so we'd both really like to see it. Do you think it would be acceptable for DH to come as a second guest if he just wandered around outside and then sat in the library/coffee shop and didn't attempt to come to any of the talks etc?

@sheepdogdelight i would say that’s perfectly acceptable. In fact that is exactly what Durham says for their open day; that if subject talks become too crowded that prospective students take priority over additional guests. So I’m expecting that I may not be able to attend some of the talks and I’m fine with that.

We did that at my elder son's offer holder day @sheepdogdelight
One parent was specified and DH signed in but we did a bit of a tag team thing. DH went in for the subject specific stuff as DS is studying something closely related to DH's work so he obviously was more interested and better placed to advise DS on anything he saw there, but I went into the finance talk and looked at the accomodation.And for other bits we left him on his own and went to the coffee shop. I think most people were doing similar. They basically just dont want actual students unable to get in because someone has brought their 6 great aunties with them but anyone can wander around the campus.

@sheepdogdelight we're doing the same on Saturday with DD1 at Warwick.

She's put me down as her 'plus one' but DP is coming along to share the driving and give his opinions too.

As she wants to study Biomedical Science I'm not sure what help either of us will be during the taster session-maybe we'll just go for a coffee.

For open day medicine chat they did check,
and for dc1 lse only let in students in for some of the talks
But it is good to walk around as well

DD is now thinking of university applications. She got great grades at GCSE in 12 subjects plus an A in FSMQ Add Maths last summer including self teaching around 3 and during my chemotherapy. She has got 2 jobs which are both interesting and she's very successful at and well paid for her age. One she can get £300 a day on a good day.

A levels she's at a great 6th form but has changed subjects a few times. And she has not focussed on them so far and her grades have dipped a bit though overall she is doing amazingly. Her brother who is mute and gentle was sectioned at the start of her A levels, given a wrong drug which put him in a coma like state for c 6 months and cahms also got him handcuffed for 2 hours to take him in and has only recently been allowed back home. We are all deeply traumatised by what happened to him and he remains traumatised but can walk and eat by himself again and we've had his care put under the top professor in UK on NHS. So anyway her A levels now and she's changed a lot and now will take Maths, Psychology and Business Studies as well as the EPQ. We do not have predicted yet but likely to be around A*AA with an A for EPQ and mock grades lower. She wants to apply for Economics and Management at Oxford but is wondering whether to add Economics A level, the school won't let her. This is my background so I know about course etc, interviews but she asked me to ask her if people thought she should add Economics A level. And how she could do this to get a predicted grade, she's been looking at online tutoring companies but I know nothing about this. She's great at self teaching and also next year if she works less (she's been working around full-time) I expect her grades to go up. I think she would be better to stop one job and do Economics A level but don't really know how to advise. I taught myself it and another 2 A levels years ago but it was back in the dark ages where books where the only option. She also sometimes wonders about law but I more see her in Economics and Management as law seems very dull compared to her though I maybe biased as I love economics.

Lovely to see everyone's updates and sorry have been away so long. Its been difficult with DS being in hospital. Though we also managed a holiday in Maldives and another in Azores so not all bad and cancer treatment is finished apart from reconstruction op and hormone tablets for another 9 years now. And back to swimming about 3 miles a week and getting house and garden sorted. Though 10 million meetings about DS and LA refusing to give a school, argh.

Oh @Silkierabbit that’s so tough. I remember your diagnosis back in the early days of the thread, I’m glad the treatment seems to be on course at least. My brother was repeatedly sectioned and it’s never left me so wishing you all the fortitude and strength to get through. On A levels is there any tangible benefit to doing a fourth is what I would be thinking. My understanding (and I might be wrong) is unis ask for three and they only consider three no matter how many someone has. That said, I recall your daughter running with these things and managing so if it just for her own enjoyment then I don’t see why not, but I’d say absolutely not necessary in any way. With law she can always convert - DS1 is gunning to be a lawyer but is likely to do history to Middle Easy Studies and convert.

We’ve arrived in Leeds and tried to get dinner at TGIs next door at 9pm and kitchen is closed! So far his opinion is, ‘it’s ok’.

Unmumsnetty hugs @Silkierabbit. I too remember your diagnosis. Glad you're doing ok and so pleased you've got your boy back. My goddaughter (asd and anorexia) was sectioned when she was 15 and it was a horrible experience. It's amazing that your dd has continued to power through as well as she has.

The one thing o would say about picking up a 4th A level is that universities will ask for up to what they're taking. So 3 a levels might be an A star, A ,A offer but if dd is taking 4 they won't ask for the same three grades but out of her 4 subjects but maybe A star and 3x As adding an extra pressure on her.

We are having similar-ish consideration in our house as DS is pretty keen to take AS further maths next year but I'm really not sure it's worth it as it'll just add any extra hoop to jump through come offers time.

Lovely to hear from you @Silkierabbit I've been thinking of you. Sounds like things have been very tough but good you have your DS home again. Sending you all some gentle hugs

As for picking up an extra A level at this stage, I'm sure your DD is more than capable but it would add a lot of extra pressure and be quite tricky to organise if college are not supportive, probably best to focus on the ones she is doing and not worry about doing the exams. Of course she could always study the Economics content if she is interested in it. I may be wrong but I think the course she's interested in doesn't require Economics A level.

Thanks very much StColumbo Hope you enjoy Leeds. Sorry to hear you are on crutches. So sorry about your brother, the repeated sectioning seems to happen a fair amount. I think DS is at least safe from that as they now recognise it was a mistake. I agree about law conversion course. I don't think there's much benefit in 4 per se I think its showing an interest in Economics by taking the A level, would be much more sensible if her school would let her take Economics as a third. But that apparently isn't an option though she has access to all the lessons for the full course, she is just checking out exactly what that looks like.

Thanks so much QueenMabby and so sorry to hear about your goddaughter, I hope she is better now. Quite a few girls in their with eating disorders. Yes that's an interesting point about the offer could be for 4 if she takes 4 and might specify Economics too. Though the required A level is Maths and she's state school so hoping it wouldn't be too crazy an offer or they'ld be flexible if she went down. I looked up average points students have and with 3 A levels plus her EPQ and her level 3 from before she'ld be around average already and 4 would put her top 20%. I think pressure wise she'ld manage, academically she'ld manage but its whether she would really stop her working as she loves money. And whether it needs the effort of a 4th.

Thanks very much Its Yes it doesn't require Economics A level though I'ld be interested to know in practice how many don't have plus there's the issue of proving your interest in the subject. I read Economics and the A level wasn't a requirement but would say almost 100% had it but knew someone who read PPE who didn't have Economics though did have Maths and FM. For straight Economics I would say you really need Economics but I don't know for joint. Maybe she could find out on an open day. I'm thinking actually maybe she doesn't need a predicted grade.

It's lovely to be back on the thread, I did miss you all.

Lovely to see you back here @Silkierabbit although what a tough year for you all, sending hugs 
The Economics degree admission criteria focus on maths rather than economics, particularly as not all schools offer Economics. I don't think a fourth A level is necessary, particularly as your DD is doing so well.

Last mock for DS yesterday - a day off today (all year 12s have had 2 weeks study leave for the mocks, although no study leave for the AS exams...a bit weird). Next week is Next Steps week, with a mix of core & optional sessions & presentations which looks really good.

@StColumbofNavron hope the open day at Leeds goes well.

@Silkierabbit, good to see you back but sorry to hear about your son - you've had a tough few years. Glad that your treatment went well. Your dd sounds driven and hard working. Where is she aiming for?

Oof. The exam results are in. As in maths and chemistry which is fantastic but a C in physics which is a bit of a disaster!

I'm hoping his teachers will see that this is just a massive oops as usually he's a solid A in physics and at parents' evening the teachers were very complimentary. Physics is what he wants to do at uni though so something will need to be done. I've encouraged ds to speak to his physics tutors today and come up with a plan. UCAS grades in two week so hopefully he can talk his way up - at least it'll be easier for physics than it would have been say for chemistry where his class assessments have been lower!

And breathe......

My kids' school don't finalise their predicted grades until late September, and give them a chance to do additional assessments in early September if they want to work hard and up their end of Y12 assessment (not just on the Y12 mock, but heavily swayed by it) - though I'm not sure they'd easily go up from a C to an A. All that said, my only B at Highers was physics (rest were A) and I went on to do a degree and PhD in it. Maths is probably more important for physics!

True. @howdoipullmyselftogether.

This is not a normal result for ds who is normally excellent at physics. Fortunately the school don't base predicted grades on these assessments alone and with all his others and his class work etc being so good it should drag him up. Will see what he says when he gets home.

Sorry to hear that your ds was disappointed with his grade @QueenMabby. Hopefully with the other evidence they can see he's capable of an A. Ds lets nerves get the better of him and rushes through maths questions so makes silly mistakes. He also had a bad day on the day of the FM test so we'll be on tenterhooks a bit too until the results come out.

Thanks @Lightsabre. I think his problem is that he genuinely finds the physics work quite easy so he then rushes through it and leaves out swathes of detail that's necessary to get good marks!

He could probably use a tutor - not for content but for how to approach exam questions! Do normal tutors cover this sort of thing does anyone know?

@QueenMabby this is what I fear for DS, who is also known to rush & make silly mistakes because of this. We had a Maths tutor for him at GCSE & she was very good at explaining the practical approach & exam techniques but I expect it's very dependent on the individual tutor...perhaps worth asking locally for recommendations? Hopefully as you say, he can convince the school to consider his general performance in assessing the UCAS grade. Good luck 🤞

@QueenMabby The physics tutor we had for DS did just that. He did go through material that DS wasn't confident in, but an awful lot of time was spent looking at past questions and pointing out that that this type of question meant you had to give this sort of answer. There's a knack to understanding the key words in the sentence, that I'm sure they must cover at school but sometimes it's useful to have a second person saying it in a different way.

You can always specify to a particular tutor what you want and see what they say (we went with someone who was actually a physics teacher, specifically because we wanted someone who was au fait with current questions and what examiners were looking for, rather than someone who might just be good at physics).

Thanks @sheepdogdelight - I might try to suggest something to ds. Will have to be careful though - he's the type of person who would automatically assume I think he's stupid and crap at the subject if I suggest getting some help!

In other news, the open day at Bath seems to be going well from the texts I've received (he's gone with dh). Very impressive apparently.

Where is everyone else visiting this weekend?

Hey @Silkierabbit lovely to see you on this thread again. I have also been thinking about you. So sorry to hear the traumatic experience you have been through with your DS but it’s great that he is back home again. I echo what others have said in that adding an extra a-level at this stage might be quite stressful and not entirely necessary but I recall that your DD always tended to take everything in her stride. Great to have you back!

Sorry to hear your DS is unhappy with his Physics grade @QueenMabby. It does sound like an anomaly though and not what him or the teachers were expecting. Hope he manages to get some reassurance from his teachers and they can put a plan in place.

@StColumbofNavron how was Leeds yesterday? DD had some friends attending. It’s funny you mentioned kitchens being closed early, we had exactly the same thing in Durham on Thursday night. We were trying to find somewhere to eat at 9pm and were turned away from about 4 places as they were closing and had to make do with Nando’s!

So we had our Durham open day yesterday. Unfortunately the English talks weren’t on as the English department were striking. Instead we were given a generic talk on the Humanities dept (which includes English, Philosophy and Liberal arts) by a lecturer not in the department! It was chaotic and confusing and people were rightly annoyed that we hadn’t been informed prior to the open day. The talk was very high level and we didn’t learn anything new and DD was frustrated. She already has decided she prefers the course offered at Exeter and was hoping to be wowed by a professor talking passionately about their research led teaching and this didn’t happen. So for a good hour or so after DD was very negative and it really put her off applying to Durham, which is a shame as she really loved the city and was buzzing about it when we walked around it the night before. Then we went and looked at some colleges and spoke to some student ambassadors and she started to come round again. So it’s still in the running but she does have a few doubts on the course itself.

@legosunqueen i hope you enjoy your day at Durham today and hope your subject talks are running. Tell me what you guys thought about the university! 😀

Oh and I hope Bath goes well today @QueenMabby !

Leeds was a win for us, he seems less enamoured with Manchester - think it was quite sprawling compared to Leeds, but he hasn’t ruled any out. We only have a shortlist of 6 anyway as he is looking to feed niche historical interest. However, I’ve been driving a lot of the organisation until now and the last two days have spurred him independently to look at and compare the actual module listings (which are obviously subject to change).

A real shame about Durham. I cancelled Durham ages ago and they have constantly been sending messages like I am attending. Including a feedback on the day email.