Sixth form boarding - what have I overlooked to buy?

[ifonly4]

DD is boarding for Sixth Form. I've been through the long list provided by the school and made one of my own, but just wondering if there's anything I might have overlooked or would be useful for DD to take.

home & error, thanks for replying to my posts.

Luckily they have a pretty full on day, from 8-6pm with lessons, free periods, other organised things and then 7-9pm is study time. She's doing squash, choir and orchestra, have a feeling there was a debating society which might be worth suggesting as that's up her street.

Had a message today ignoring problems and talking academics, she's switched a subject but apparently did really well in a piece of work in subject she's dropping and has done a test on whatever they've covered so far in geography and the feedback is that it's around an A/A* at A level, so at least she's holding her own in a private school with high academic success.

It isn't really that practical to get her back home every weekend, which she knew from the start, doesn't help her at the moment though.

Anyway, there's a meeting tomorrow, DD, us, her HM and a key member of staff who will understand where she's coming from. Never thought we'd need to have a meeting about her anywhere. Positives and negatives to staying, I think we all keep swaying as to what is best, but having members of staff there might help balance things out from their experience as they say they only want to work out what's best for DD not the school.

Hope your DDs have a good weekend in school/at home.

Ifonly, thanks for the update.
I'm sorry if I wasn't clear, I wasn't suggesting your DD came home each weekend, but that each half term she did one extra trip, so home every 3-4 weeks.

I hope the meeting goes well tomorrow and that you are all able to reach a decision that works best for your DD.
Please keep us updated, x

home & error, how are both of your DDs getting on - well I hope.

The meeting at the school (mentioned on my other thread) went well. Even if the school can't offer her quite what she hoped for, we don't think it can go wrong in terms of education, support, knowledge and flexibility (ie her HM says she can drop EPQ if she's definitely working to her end goal which will be time consuming etc).

However, DD was clearly very tired. She's going to try out a couple of things over the next few days which she should enjoy and might convince her to stick at it. If not, she will come back at the end of the week as she needs to catch up with her A level work elsewhere.

Hi ifonly and thanks for the update.
It sounds very unsettling and I hope that come the weekend your DD is in a position to make a final decision and hopefully start to enjoy sixth form (wherever that is)
It's good to learn that her current school are being so reasonable and not pressuring you.
I have the impression that your DD has taken this opportunity for the music provision (as our DD has for Drama).
For us it was a very late offer, and I had taken comfort in knowing that DD had achieved the standard she's at without all the extras that specialist school provide, so to continue at the original school and with extra-curric activities in place, DD would've continue to improve,
Which is a long winded way of saying that the specialist school is very nice, but it's not essential.
Good luck to your DD, whatever she decides, it's been a valuable learning experience and there's a lot of positives in that.
Please let us know what she chooses.

It's so hard isn't it - a couple of weeks is not that long to settle in to a completely new way of life , but leave it any longer and her studies will potentially suffer if she dies indeed end up elsewhere. Hope this week brings more clarity one way or the other.

DD met with her BFF who is at the local comp this weekend and was exceptionally envious of her 2.30 home time! She is timetabled till 6pm (although most of each afternoon is devoted to activities rather than lessons) and then confined to quarters 7-9 for prep with some further rehearsals etc after that. I am now pleased we didn't organise anything for half term!!

Homebythesea - is it bad that I'm ever so curious to know where your DD is? There aren't that many school with a PA focus.....
DD is at TP in Herts

error they were very nearly classmates then 😉. I will pm you

How funny! Will look out for the PM

DD said she wanted to be back by this weekend if that was the decision - we're still waiting and have no idea which way it'll go.

We think the school has a lot to offer and she should stay, subject to feeling that she is making friends and can cope with times she's with the girls who don't talk/mix.

We've had two nights of messages indicating she might come back and then yesterday one telling us she's confused.

Is there any chance if moving to another boarding house? there might be another girl who'd love to swop.

Yesterday was the first day we hadn't heard from her, so contacted her at 10pm as we need to confirm a place at her old school this week. She seemed much happier, thought she was staying, was loving RE, music department are going out of their way to find more options for her and apparently didn't go to the school social on Sat as she was in another house with two other girls. Pointed out she has to be sure she can handle any negatives, but fingers crossed this is the turning point.

error - I suggested changing houses, apparently it's not the done thing as it gets around and everyone thinks you've snubbed the girls in your old house.

Haven't posted on the Year 12 support thread for a while as I didn't want to keep posting negatives things, but who knows, I might be back on there!

Finally DD has a weekend crest so we'll be heading off this afternoon to bring her home for the weekend. 😊

Ours took at least a fortnight for the new school to see a sparkle and then it was full on fun and seemingly lifelong friendships. It was a whole new language and very different expectations from a state comprehensive so no wonder it took a little adjustment. Ours was full boarding but most went home after sports on Saturday but there were closed weekends when everyone had to stay. They were exhausted by the long, completely full days.
In the end it was a really good stepping stone to university.

Sorry for crest read Exeat!!
Anyway DD home and hasn't stopped raving about how wonderful her school is and how happy she is to be there. Huge relief for us, and so pleased to see her increased confidence, and love of life after the GCSE year.
Crumbs - thanks for your insight, it's always good to hear positive stories when you start (or your child starts) something that is new and very different to anything we've experienced before.
Ifonly - thinking of you and your DD this weekend, the last update was so positive. I hope that's continued for her.

error, hope the weekend goes well with your DD. Good to know she seems really happy.

The only contact we've had from DD since she said she was staying, is asking if she can go to a party when she's home next weekend. She's generally isn't one for keeping in touch, so I'm hoping this is a good sign as she was contacting us every day.

Great news error .

Thanks guys. It was great to see DD and hear how happy she is.
I think I need to start arranging to go in to work late after a break.
We took her back to school at 5 - no one else had returned! So we went out for a meal, and returned at 7:30, luckily lots more of her friends were back, but it's then a long drive home and v tired this morning!
Worth it though

error, glad you had a good weekend with your DD.

home, how are things for your DD?

Although, DD is much happier with certain aspects at her new school, she's generally very flat and we've found out hasn't been eating much which is unlike her. Even though she can see good points for staying, I think she's just about made the decision to come home which given she's hardly eating I'm relieved about. She's home this weekend and she's got a taster day at her old school. Both schools have been brilliant and very supportive, that final decision just needs to be made.

Hi ifonly, your DD has been so resilient to stick with this for a month and give it her best shot. I bet you're excited to get her home this weekend, and im sure it will be a relief to see her and help her move forwards to being happy again x

ifonly I'm sure this is very stressful for you all- but it sounds like she has given it a good go but maybe it just isn't for her? I know that at DD's school there have been a handful of leavers already. It certainly doesn't suit everyone and it's great that you are facilitating a change.

DD is loving her school. It's very full on and she is knackered at the weekend. She's doing ok in the classroom too so that keeps the parents happy 😉

What a rollercoaster. Picked DD up on Thurs for her first weekend home, as she was leaving I had the comment "how can I leave this" and all she's talked about is new school since coming home. She did a taster day at her old school yesterday and says she doesn't even want to consider going back there. I've just pointed out she has to be sure she can cope with any negatives and as whichever schools she's at on Monday she'll be staying at. Long term we think the new school is better for her in many ways, but she has to be happy.

rollercoaster indeed!!
Can't wait for the final decision!

Having raved about school all last weekend, DD has found this week back at school difficult. Mainly the constant presence of other people, plus the teachers have upped the academic work, so for DD who is used to working in a quiet house, the constant noise at school and in the boarding house is proving hard work!
Luckily she seems more upbeat today, having got through to the weekend!!

The noise is something DD has mentioned - she relishes the relative quiet at home! It will be the same if they go to Uni and live in halls so maybe good to get used to it now.

We told DD whichever school she went to on Monday was the one she'd have to stay at now and she chose the new school. She returned on Sunday and we haven't heard since which I can only imagine is a good thing as she's not really the sort for keeping in touch. She feels she's starting to making friends and has found another girl who doesn't like studying much on her own, so they're sometimes going to get together, so this may help.

home, we see it as a great stepping stone to uni as they'll have had time to adapt to certain aspects before they move on.

error, hope everything is okay with your DD.

It's the "stepping stone" aspect that I think will benefit DD most - she's a real home body and Mummy's girl and not terribly self reliant. She rang on Sunday night proud as punch that she'd managed to put her clean sheets on the bed by herself!!