What made you decide to become a foster parent and are these good reasons ?

[Gigglebiz]

DH and I are thinking of applying.

We have one DS and for medical reasons it would be very difficult to have another so we won't be. Dh comes from a family of 3 and wants more children round the house. We both work in the financial sector and it seems so pointless to me as it isn't doing any good for anyone. Giving up my job and fostering means I would be able to spend more time with DS and also hopefully do something useful

DHs Sis and family foster which is another reason why we think we could do it and want to. We have seen that it can be difficult but also rewarding.

Do these seem like reasonable reasons to you, what made you decide to become a foster parent ? Am regular but name changed for this just as some people know me on the boards and we are just working this through in our heads.

Thanks

Hi Giggle, they seem reasonable reasons to me

If I'm totally honest I started fostering for me, it was something I felt I would be good at and, an important reason, for me, at the time was that I would be at home for our Dc's who were still very young.

Good luck and please feel free to ask any questions

Thanks for answering flower, have gone back to regular name as too lazy to keep changing.

Can I ask what age your DCs were when you started fostering ?
DS is just under 4 and I understand that there has to be a 2 year old age gap between foster children and your own which doesn't leave a huge range of potential children, also have to admit I'm not particularly keen on the baby stage and I understand lots of people are so we are probably looking at toddlers.

Anyway sorry bit of an expansion. DS is our PFB and if we do this I'm hoping it will make his life better as well as I will have more time to spend with him. However not sure how he will adjust to another child or potentially other children dependant on what type of fostering we do as he is used to getting a lot of my full attention when I am around. How did your DCs adapt to this ?

Hi rookie,

our 3 dc's were 10, 7 and 4 when we first started.

We included them a lot in the discussions and social worker visits where possible and they were all given the chance to voice any concerns they had about new children coming into their lives and having to share not only us but toys and space.

I think the 2 year gap is the ideal for ss but we've fostered children the same age as our youngest in the past when it's been needed and those placements worked out well for us.

As for how ours adapted, I suppose ours were used to it in a way because they had siblings already so were used to having to share our attention.

We had dealt with sibling rivalry by telling each of ours that they were special to us in their own way
ie DD1 is our first baby
DS1 our only son
DD2 our last baby
and that sharing with fc's would in no way alter this for them.

Hope this helps

Hi rookie,

our 3 dc's were 10, 7 and 4 when we first started.

We included them a lot in the discussions and social worker visits where possible and they were all given the chance to voice any concerns they had about new children coming into their lives and having to share not only us but toys and space.

I think the 2 year gap is the ideal for ss but we've fostered children the same age as our youngest in the past when it's been needed and those placements worked out well for us.

As for how ours adapted, I suppose ours were used to it in a way because they had siblings already so were used to having to share our attention.

We had dealt with sibling rivalry by telling each of ours that they were special to us in their own way
ie DD1 is our first baby
DS1 our only son
DD2 our last baby
and that sharing with fc's would in no way alter this for them.

Hope this helps

oops don't know what happened there

Thanks Flower.

In many ways I think it would be better for DS if the foster child was roughly the same age as him as I think he would love to have a playmate. Also as an only I hope that it would in the long run be a good learning experience for him to have other children around.

What a good idea to get your DC involved in the process. I'm unsure if it would be particularly meaningful for DS but I think he would be very into the concept of having more time with me and life being less rushed.

We have registered our interest now and I have to say it is something I am getting more sure about as each day passes and DH feels the same. Fingers crossed for us.