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Fostering

Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on fostering.

Family History

4 replies

Magrat17 · 18/11/2020 11:21

Hi all,

I wanted to get your view please, as after discussing for a couple of years, my partner and I would love to start the application now I've been made redundant and have more time. The problem is, I have had some difficulties in the past and want to know if you think it would prevent us from being accepted? My own childhood was hard, lots of violence in the home and I was sexually abused for some years by the teenage sons of a family friend. My ex husband had bipolar and was also very manipulative and emotionally abusive, which made it very difficult for me to raise my daughter in the stable loving home i wanted for her, thankfully she's now a wonderful mum and I have beautiful grandchildren.

My partner is very kind and gentle and we have a very loving and stable relationship. We have our own home, car etc and partner works. I think that we could give lots of support and help to children and would love to foster, as I think my experiences have given me understanding and strength, but what are your thoughts? Do they generally see people who have similar lives as less able to provide security or stability etc? Thanks

OP posts:
nitsandwormsdodger · 18/11/2020 12:58

They would snap you up in double quick time
A bit of experienced of real life is ideal
They are only concerned if you are currently battling issues

Magrat17 · 18/11/2020 13:22

Thank you for your reply nitsandwormsdodger, I hope that's what we find, it would be wonderful. I am just worried they might think my history would mean I might be a bit flaky or unreliable etc, which I'm not. Hopefully you're right and they do accept us.

OP posts:
f0stercarer · 19/11/2020 09:34

dont pre judge the process. Go with it, be open and honest. Having challenges in your past is a plus not a minus.

nitsandwormsdodger · 20/11/2020 13:39

I tried to downplay my mental health struggles and didn't mention I was gay as I didn't want to be rejected snd was pulled up on it
I wish I'd been honest and up front , as they totally accept all your past as long as it's in the past ( ie no violent ex's popping by etc)
The children you foster will have experienced same as you and you will be expert at navigating that for them
They desperately need you as you .
Fostering is a huge effort and huge joy in equal measures just like being a parent and you have proved you can do it well already , I was accepted as a single gay non mum so your have much more going for you
Good luck the process is v Throrough and no stone will be left unturned
It's a bit like therapy but harsher, Grinthey looked in my fridge and interviewed my work colleagues and family, all worth it

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