Fostering

[Olivia1022]

Hello. My first post on here. I have 4 children and I’m looking into fostering. My children are 2,3,5 and 9. All attend nursery or school. We own our home and we have a spare room. I love children and would love to be able to help a child in need. The only problem is my partner. I have a clear criminal record but he doesn’t. He has been to prison 12 years ago for ABH. He only did 3 months. But recently he has been in trouble with his friends for production of cannabis. I was not aware this was happening I will add it was a huge shock. Will this stop me as the investigation is still pending. He’s an amazing dad, he’s so caring and has a good job. He’s just made a couple of silly mistakes.

You would have to speak to your local agency to check with them, but it would definitely be a red flag.

Whilst you know the man and he may not be a bad person, social services don't get the luxury of spending that amount of time with him. They have to place children in to care that is as close to 100% safe as possible and your partner has a conviction for abh and a current investigation for drug production.

Having been through the process, it would be a difficult task to convince social services it is the right environment to foster, especially if he is convicted of the latest crime.

The process will look at his background in depth. I very much doubt he will be allowed to foster!

And, whilst he may be an amazing dad, think of it the other way round.

If for some reason you were unwell and needed your children to go into foster care for a period of time, would you want them living with someone who has been convicted of ABH and who has recently been arrested for producing drugs?

The ABH is potentially less problematic given it was years ago, if your partner is able to show he takes responsibility for his past actions and has made changes. The recent cannabis charge is another matter, that will be viewed very seriously as many children in care are at high risk of being sucked into drug dealing and county lines. I doubt you would be approved, sorry.

And many foster children will be coming from families where drugs were prevalent. I'm sorry, but it's unreasonable to expect to be approved when your husband has this background!

I don’t think there’s much point in asking to go through the fostering assessment process while any investigation is pending. Also, your kids are really young. You’d be best off waiting until they are much older before fostering other kids, as fostered kids need a lot of attention and your own children might find it hard to cope with with that.

Silly mistakes?

Do many high-earners/graduates go into fostering?
I'd be interested to hear from other high-earning professionals who have given up their job to foster children. Is it essential for partner to still earn or do you live off your savings?
Trying to think about how this can work financially.
I'm aware that people say they don't foster for the money (and I can see why looking at the fees paid) however some lower earners obviously DO manage to live off the money - or do they work part-time?
Thanks