Social worker wants to know about foster careers sex life

[Justdontknowwhattothink]

Just want to ask, has anybody been asked about their sex lives, where when and frequency, toys, bondage, porn and where you keep any items? And if so what has your response been? Just wondering if it's a national or local topic!

Fucking hell that seems excessively intrusive

That's fucking mad!

They can't be asking this shit surely??!!

Yep, they asked us even back then. What they’re checking for is that you keep all sex toys etc HIDDEN so that no child could find them and that you’re not a weirdo who acts out inappropriate hard core porn.

I completely understand this. They want to make sure its well hidden away. Child cant find it. As alot of the children will of experienced abuse or trauma.

However it seems rather intrusive...neccessary I imagine

Thanks, I don’t think we are going to continue with the assessment any more, I understand about it all being kept safe, and not wanting children to hear and see anything.It just feels really intrusive when and what we get up to, having had our own children, we just wanted to give something back.

It is an incredibly intrusive procedure but it has to be. You have to be completely open and transparent and consider everything in relation to a potential child and so my thoughts are if you are having doubts about this from answering a few questions then there are other things in the process that will also put you off. My mum is a foster carer and does an amazing job but it's bloody hard work.

Yes.... they did with us... it’s very intuitive and it goes into more depth they involve your family and friends..... that said please don’t let it put you off.... it’s such a small part of the process the process is hard but it’s supposed to be so that they know you won’t quit when the hard stuff comes! I’m a foster carer and the process is a drop in the ocean to how rewarding it is!

I am sorry but I would be telling them it is private and that your sex life will also be kept private should you become a foster carer x I've been a foster carer for seven years and have never been asked such questions.

Old thread I know but I am aware of married foster parents where the man is a frequent user of prostitutes behind his wife's back, seeing them at parlours and visiting one at her home frequently. Is this behaviour that puts the fostered children at risk and should I report this information anywhere? I am aware it could have serious ramifications but the situation worries me.

So he's not going to admit that in front of his wife during the assessment process.

So the question is invalid. He will just say what he wants his wife and the assessor to hear!