Feel so low

[Mrbojangles1]

Right first i have to say we havent had a hoilday since we started fostering :(

So befire placemnt started i thought right i am booking somthing right baby then came and right at the start i gave in the completed passport for however with out my knowing the put the form on hold thinking baby would be adopted by now and would not need it

They only put the form in two weeks ago (we are going on hoilday in 4 weeks ) i was told today the form was returned because they dont have the birth mothers birth certifcate (which we wont get because she has disenaged with ss) so they are now talking about us putting baby in respite i have been crying all day

Last placemnt i stayed at hime with fc whilest oh and son went away their is no way i cam do it again but i cant see how i can leave baby

I feel so shit

You can get mothers birth cert if you've some idea where she was born. Or Fathers? I've done passports for CLA under these circumstances.

Although 2 weeks is pushing it and I would be a bit PO with whoever decided that one.

I can sympathize Mrbo, I too did this a few years ago. Dh and our DD's and grandchild went away for two weeks with me refusing to leave the lo. His adoption was due to start introductions a week or so after we would have returned and it felt like an awful thing to do to him.

I can say with all my heart that while I missed my lot dreadfully (I had insisted they go without me) I have never regretted it. I know I wouldn't have enjoyed the holiday for worrying about the lo and I would have made the others miserable too.

Only you can decide whats right for you though. I have friends who foster who thought I was totally bonkers for passing up a holiday "for a baby who won't even remember" they pointed out. I would have remembered though

Hello

It's a difficult situation and I feel your pain .

We went away in December for three nights abroad, but we left lo (who was too young to go/plus we thought lo would be moving on before then) with a good friend who lo was familiar with (it was passed with ss). Is there someone you would feel happier leaving lo with if ss would ok it, rather than lo going into respite?

I still felt awful about it though, but on the other hand I felt my children really needed some undivided attention.

Hope you manage to get something sorted, do what feels right for you, your lo and your family x

I haven't had a break for a year and am in severe need of it.. I'm not happy to leave a 7 month old and 18 month old so have put my life on hold ( other than a few hours here and there), it is hard but i would feel awful if i didn't. I have now invited my sister over for a week so that we can share the babies for a bit and go out it is easier with someone to help you.

I feel shit about the whole thing cant cancel the hoilday will let down the whole fanily cant leave lo because baby will be let down

I was assured agaisntmy better judgement that they would be ale to get hold of the passport now look what a god dam mess

My LA said they were introducing a policy of obtaining passports for ALL children as soon as they entered the care system. They said it would prevent situations like this, but also be a means of identification for the children.

Needless to say it never happened and only last week I had a friend have to cancel a holiday.