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Fostering

Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on fostering.

Original poster

Help I'm having a baby.

53 replies

ChooChooWowWow · 08/12/2011 17:20

I haven't done babies for 5 years. She's 8 months old.
So, travel cot and age appropriate pushchair have been turfed from loft and dusted down.hank goodness I kept them. The SW or police are bringing her round some time this evening.

I have no idea how big she is, what she eats/drinks, what her routine is (if any).

DH has been dispatched to Asda to buy:
Nappies
Babygros
Vests
Milk
A couple of food jars - would normally cook fresh but this may be what she's used to.
Bottles
Dummy
Hat and mittens - need to go out for school run tomorrow

I've found some soft sheets in the airing cupboard and the other dc have donated a fleece for a blanket. Also a few cuddly toys.
So anything else and what are the rules for LOs these days re feeding ect.

OP posts:
lalabaloo · 09/12/2011 12:20

How did last night go? Hoping it all went as smoothly as it could. 7 kids for Christmas, wow! Do you have other foster children already or 5 children of your own? (You don't have to answer that if it sounds too nosy)

Original poster
ChooChooWowWow · 09/12/2011 12:23

Hello everyone, well the baby arrived at 10pm last night. Her sister went to another carer in the end which I am very sad about, it seemed cruel to split them at such a difficult time.
LO is adorable. A few health issues but good care will resolve them. She is a normal 8 month size but arrived squeezed into 0-3 month clothes. We have been shopping this morning for more suitable stuff.
Thanks so much for all the advice, I can't believe how much the guidelines change in such a short space of time.

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scarlet5tyger · 09/12/2011 13:34

I've been shocked by two things in this thread:

  1. That someone should find it unreasonable for a FC to be excited about a new placement - there's precious little we can get excited about with this job and it seems very petty for someone to take away one of the few things there are! I ALWAYS get excited when a new child arrives. Okay, it might be a nervous excitement with a huge dollop of apprehension thrown in too but its lovely to know your skills are going to be put to good use again.

  2. The plug covers article - I had no idea about the dangers of safety covers and was actually reminded to fit them to a new socket I'd had fitted at my last health and safety check! I'm going to print that article out for my support worker.

bottersnike · 09/12/2011 14:12

Glad LO has arrived safely, ChooChoo. Our LO was a bit younger than that when she arrived. We also bought the following:
dummies
many many muslin cloths
teethings rings etc

It's lovely that you're excited about her! We were too about our LO, and still are really, despite the lack of sleep some nights (somehow I'd forgotten how that feels!!)
Keep us posted - it's nice to hear how the tiny ones get on, particularly once they're getting the right care and stimulation.
x

TheReturnoftheSmartArse · 09/12/2011 14:17

ChooChoo and all the other FCs out there: I think you're wonderful. Good luck!

fraktious · 09/12/2011 15:20

Oh that is sad choochoo but I'm glad the little one is okay.

And of course you should be excited. I have no direct experience of the system but I would find it do depressing if you were saying 'ugh I have another coming and even worse it's a baby'. Heartbreaking for the family but positive that the little one has gone to someone who is excited and not someone who doesn't care.

Original poster
ChooChooWowWow · 09/12/2011 16:19

I must admit I do get very excited when we have a new arrival. It doesn't matter how old they are. It's just that wonderful feeling of knowing you can make a difference to a child's life. This LO has come from terrible circumstances, every time she has laughed today I feel happy because I know I have made her warm and comfortable with a full tummy. Grin

Scarlet the plug thing shocked me. Printing it for SWs is a brilliant idea. I know mine doesn't know because we discussed them at a recent H & S check.

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BusterTheDonk · 09/12/2011 18:15

Good luck Choo Choo.. what a shame they were split, hopefully they'll get plenty of opportunity for contact with each other... I'm sure she'll settle in and thrive with you..

I think the criticisms of "us being excited" came from non-regulars on fostering on here.. sadly this thread appeared under the "most active" part of mumsnet..

Well done already and keep posting!! Here's some Thanks

SquidgyBrain · 10/12/2011 01:27

Oh I am so glad that the little one arrived safely. Hopefully you have both had an ok sort of day.

I can't believe that anyone would think that it wasn't ok for us to get excited about a new placement. We train hard for this job, and sitting with an empty placement can be difficult. I know each and everyone who regularly posts here wishes that we never had any placements, and our jobs were redundant, but sadly that isn't the reality, so where we are not excited for the child, we are excited about the new challenges that lay ahead of us and the start of our journeys with these LO's

Re the socket covers :S - shall take that up with my link worker too

the milk thing - we have categorically been told that there is no safe way of keeping milk in the fridge and everything has to be made fresh. For the over night feeds what I do is have a sterilised bottle and a flask of water which has been boiled and cooled to the right sort of temperature (you need to play about to get the right temp) and have a tommee tippee milk container with the dry powder in it - this is the fastest and easiest way I have found to make milk up! During the day I often store cooled boiled water in the bottles and then just heat up by adding some boiled water then the milk powder - mothercare do a scoop that measures upto 8 scoops at once - costs about £10 worth it's weight in gold!

fraktious · 10/12/2011 02:54

squidgy are you sure you're getting the water to 70C that way? If its less than 70 then you're taking big risks because it's the powder which carries the infectious agents not the water. That's why it's safe to put decontaminated, reconstituted milk in the fridge for no more than 24 hours (and I would say no more than 12 to be safe).

fraktious · 10/12/2011 03:03

guidelines - p11 says fresh, 18 & 22 talk about storage.

It makes sense when you think about the science behind it.

ChippingInNeedsSleep · 10/12/2011 06:42

ChooChoo - lots of lovely cuddles then :) Any chance you could convince them to let you have her sister as well, it does seem cruel to separate them when you are able to have them both. Any idea how long you will have her for?

There are loads of threads on the making up of milk. The worst thing you can do is make the formula up with water that isn't about 70 deg (to kill the bacteria in the formula, not too hot or it kills off the nutrients in the powder) there are hours worth of debate over what is best to do re reheating/storing etc. I think it's best to make it up fresh when you can (I find using hot water to mix the formula then add cold water to the temp you want it - obviously you need to measure out the amount of HW & CW first for a little while until you get used to the levels is so easy you might as well just do it each time and you can take a flask of hot water out with you easily enough).

You don't need to sterilise - just ensure the bottles are washed thoroughly :)

You are lucky to have each other :)

mumtosome · 10/12/2011 08:18

Hi Squidgy ( Shaz here - namechanged :)) The socket thing shocked me too. I only discovered it after Barnardos told me about it.

Re making up feed I can't understand this to be honest. My little boy is tube fed and for almost 6 years was fed formula via his tube, all which had to be made up. Essentially it's the same as baby formula but with extra nutrition for older child etc. Bare in mind many people receiving this type of feeding are also have very weak immune systems.

Guidelines are to make the feed with water of a bout 70degrees just like baby foob, but that you can make 24hours worth and keep it in the fridge........... not sure what the difference with the baby formula is that means you can't do that.

IMO and my vast experience of the medical world, I believe these are the guidelines for all because they are worried about a few irresponsible or less able parents who would not be sensible and would end up giving their child food poisoning and so they develop an unnecessary blanket policy.......

SquidgyBrain · 10/12/2011 09:18

Sorry I wasn't being clear - I keep the water at 70 degrees or above in the flask and then cool, and again top up the bottles to get them to 70 (it just takes less time to cool from 70 than boiling)

When I used to make the feeds in the milk kitchen at the hospital (the joys of being a student nurse) we certainly like you say Shaz made up batches of feeds and then stored it. I think that the problem comes when people don't have their fridges at the right temp, and do things like keep the milk in the door.

It is the huge changes in weaning that is blowing my mind - lumpy foods and finger foods from the start now so it seams........

Original poster
ChooChooWowWow · 10/12/2011 14:39

God my head is spinning with all this milk stuff. My dd is only 4.6 and I used to make up 6 bottles in the morning and store them all day in the fridge. When did it all change?. As for the food that's another minefield Confused.

I'm using some jars which she is enjoying. She had a piece of toast this morning but wasn't really interested. I gave her some small pieces of melon and banana at lunch which she loved. She is doing really well and (sadly) showing no sign of missing mum.
I'm not sure what will happen re her sister coming to me. Without going into detail what I've heard so far makes me think it is very unlikely these LOs will return home. I just pray if this does end in adoption they will find someone who is willing to take both dc.

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SauvignonBlanche · 10/12/2011 14:46

What an excting time for your family!
I do hope that the poor little girls are re-united.
Good luck to them and your family - God bless you. Thanks

gallicgirl · 10/12/2011 15:10

Poor little mite. milk is a mine field and there's so much advice around. I'm just amazed nobody has invented a special baby thermometer so we can all test our water is at exactly the right temperature!

If it helps for feeding, there's a great website called babyledweaning.com for help with the obvious. I bet a lot of people do a mixture of puree and BLW feeding.

mumtosome · 10/12/2011 15:51

You can get food thermometers very cheaply if you feel you need to check the temp...

gallicgirl · 10/12/2011 16:22

Me? nah...she's almost a year old and I've not made her ill yet.....

In fact I've only just bought an in-ear thermometer. < bad mummy emoticon >

Original poster
ChooChooWowWow · 10/12/2011 18:23

Oh BLF = Baby Led Feeding Grin I kept seeing that on here, didn't have a clue what it meant. No more jars for us. French toast for tomorrows breakfast.

gallicgirl thanks for that link it explains it all.

She's having some naked at the moment. She has the most terrible nappy rash, loads of open weeping sores so I'm on a mission to get that cleared up.

OP posts:
Original poster
ChooChooWowWow · 10/12/2011 18:24

Thats meant to be naked time

OP posts:
gallicgirl · 10/12/2011 18:39

aww poor thing. Probably left in a dirty nappy too long. :(

I saw a thread here a while ago about nappy rash and only remedy I could remember was egg white! Apparently it creates a breathable waterproof coating.

fraktious · 10/12/2011 19:07

SadSadSadSad about the sores

Chamomile tea on cotton wool instead of medicated wipes also helps

I really respect what you and all the other FCs do. It breaks my heart reading this as DS is nearly 8mo and he's still so vulnerable.

BLW is great but messy and if she's not done it before be careful as she may gag/choke very easily. Unless DS seems in real trouble I leave him to cough the food up which he usually can but counting to 5 before I yank him out the highchair is nerve wracking!

RandomMess · 10/12/2011 19:12

The most amazing thing for hideous nappy sores is a spray for bed sores, trade name "sprilon" , my dds got horrific nappy rash sores very easily and I got it on pescription and it is amazing, very very think layer and it's breathable etc

About £7 a can though - chemist may have to order it in. Worth every penny though.

SleepyCaz · 10/12/2011 19:19

Couldn't read and run.

Fantastic job you're doing, well done :)

Agree about the spray, I work in a hospital and the spray we use on very bad nappy rash, or pressure sores is called Cavilon. GP's can prescribe it. Also comes in little sticks, that look like cotton buds with only one end. Fantastic stuff.

You're all amazing on here BTW.

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