Gifts for BP

[anji9012]

Our FC have been with us 15 months at present. With Christmas approaching, I am wondering what do for BM of the LO's.

The court has just ruled that they are to go up for adoption.

What would be 'correct thing to do'

Last year we did handmade cards and framed pictures of them, but things are different now.

I don't want to upset BM, but I feel I should do something.

any suggestions

Oh anji.. what a difficult situation to be in...

Presumably contact will begin to cease with BP's soon then?

I'm trying really hard to think what I'd do (and may be in exactly in the same situation soon too)...

How old are the LO's? How is BM taking this?

I think probably anything you do will be hugely appreciated but at the same time also very upsetting for her... some long-lasting token momento..?

Do you have any local photographers to have a portrait done of them? We did this last year and she only charged us £10!!

Will look forward to seeing other people's suggestions & will look for my thinking cap!!

We are having handprints done for baby to bm and dd making a dvd (hopefully) for 3 yr old's bm. Both will be adopted.

Contact has been reduced to once a month, Lo are 2 and nearly 5.

Thank you for your replies.

just another thought... on Getting Personal they do lots of lovely personalised stuff... for Mother's Day I got her a compact mirror engraved with a message from them.. it really was lovely...

Good luck to you too when the time comes to say goodbye..

What wonderful foster carers you are, to think of giving something to the birthmother. I have never heard of this before, and once the foster carer found out that I (as the sw) had given a Christmas cake to the birthmother and was really annoyed about it!

I'm sure anything would be appreciated even though possibly upsetting but still a lovely thought. I loved the handprints idea and a dvd for the bm - just noticed it was you BonniesLsister, and your idea BtheD was lovely too. Just shows what generous spirited people you are. Wish there were more foster carers who had the same kind of empathy for the birthparents, who have usually not had any chance in life and were almost certainly abused or neglected in their own childhood.

So glad you asked this as I'm in the same position! I usually give bm framed photos or photo albums but have been told by my sw I am not allowed to anymore incase they end up on Facebook!

So difficult now lo will be adopted as I don't want to add to her upset with special momentos!

X

How about getting a photo made onto canvas

Just noticed this thread but hope it's not too late.If photos are a problem you could try a pottery cafe as the children could paint a small item or even just do their hand print.

I love the idea of the pottery cafe - going to go and look for one near me now!