The dreaded phone call

[EarthMotherImNot]

Just had a call from lo's social worker, she's chosen a family for her

Deep breaths, EMIN, you can do it

I know it will be some weeks yet and please god we get to spend Christmas with her but it's still too soon

Yup you can do it - hang in there - keep taking those deep breaths. Happy for the LO that she has a forever family to love her but sad for you having to go through this :(

I'm happy for her, well, I'm trying to be but oh my, it's come so quickly

thinking of you...

Much support and hugs :(

Bittersweet. God they have a family for her. Sad that you will miss her. xx

I remember reading about you taking her ages ago, it seems. So glad they have a family for her but totally understand how sad it is for you. You have done her proud [bittersweet emoticon]

I hope you can find something in the new family that you like... it may help...

Trying to work out how I will feel if it happens to us.. I'm sure that no family would ever be good enough in my opinion!!

Bless you for the start you have given her and hope you have a very precious Christmas with her

When will you hear more of the plans?

Imagine the prospective parents and how excited they are, and the LO will be coming from your loving home into theirs. A job well done

And we'll be here for you every step of the way.

hope that doesn't sound harsh, it's not meant too.

Oh Emin you are in my thoughts-such a precious gift you have given this child-a fantastic start to a life with the capacity to love.

Much joy and happiness but tinged with sadness and loss.

I have a friend on the other side desperatly hoping she will get her new lo before Xmas.

Must be so hard both ways.

Thank you all.

Its all up in the air as to when we'll know more (court stuff to be finalised etc) but hopefully we'll know sooner rather than later.

I need to have time to "step back" so to speak.

Dh is puffing himself up in a sort of father of the bride sort of way, ie "they better be good to her or else they'll have me to answer to"

Our LA usually go with the belief that most families have enough going on at Christmas without moving a young baby in as well so it may (fingers crossed with apologies to adopters in waiting) be after Christmas.

We have moved a baby on in the first week of December though

Update.... I've had a phone call from the family finder who tells me that they are hoping to get to panel with the chosen family in January.

I was so scared they'd want to move her before Christmas, I know it's selfish but I'm so glad we get to spend her first Christmas together

EMIN - So pleased you get to spend Christmas with LO, not selfish at all she is comfortable with you so what better place for her to spend Christmas. She has the New Year for her New Start. Her new Mummy and Daddy will have a lifetime of Chrismas' to spend with her.

Emin that is nice for you to have her for Christmas.
my relinquished lo will be going in two weeks, so no babies in the house for us this Christmas.

Thanks HTWH, thats very true. Makes me feel better anyway

sumum have you decided not to accept any lo's for a while?

yes emin, need to concentrate on my older sn kids for a bit. so putting my pram away (but not getting rid of it

EMIN how lovely for you to be able to spend Christmas with the LO one :)

I'm not a FC (was fostered) but just wanted to say how lovely you come across in this. It's so nice to see how much some people really do care.

I don't know how it works with regard to adopting, but could you perhaps write her a letter to entrust to her new parents, so that when she's older (if she knows she was adopted) she can hear how much she meant to you?

So glad you are doing this, it makes the world a much better place, and I am so much happier knowing some foster carers really do care lots.

:)

sumum..... always a good idea to keep the pram handy

Squidgy....we are delighted about Christmas, we were actually dreading her moving quickly so it's a blessing for us.

Social worker is hoping to get on the first matching panel in early January.

LoopyLoops....Hi, thank you I always write our lo's a letter which goes in the memories/keepsake box I make up for them, no-one else would know how we've struggled in the early days and weeks with her withdrawal.

Her first tooth is just through and her cheeky one-toothed grin will be with me always