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Forces sweethearts

If you have a family member in the Royal Navy, RAF or army, find support from other Mumsnetters here.

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Original poster

Joining the army

21 replies

iheartyou · 03/05/2010 13:30

Hi everyone, I am a newbie poster but have lurked for quite a while.

My dp has been thinking for a while and has decided he would like to join the army and is going to visit a recruitment office next week.

Just wondering if I could have some inside knowledge about the process and what is actually the chance of being accepted, he is worried he will be refused and that will really shoot down his confidence.

He is 27, in good shape physically as he does an outside physical job, possibly not the brightest though and struggled on the example maths questions (mind you so did I!) but is a qualified chef although hasnt worked as one for about 3 years. He is planning to start running a few times a week in addition to the exercise at home and in his job. I am actually very supportive of this choice because currently things have not been too great between us, he is lucky to have quite an easy job in terms of hours and gets very bored and ends up drinking and things which makes me so sad as he could do so much more. I think the disapline and structure would be really beneficial. He also says he wants more of this and to be an all round healthier person.

What is army life actually like? Would he be posted away? How would me and the kids fit into it, they are 4 and 2, and we are not married.

Thanks for any insight you can give!

OP posts:

jcscot · 03/05/2010 14:48

"What is army life actually like?"

First of all, I've never served - I'm just married to someone who does. Life varies quite a bit depending on which part of the Army you join. The recruiting office is the best place for him to find out about all the different trades and jobs he could do.

"Would he be posted away?"

Yes. Army life is pretty mobile. He'll do his basic training and then his Phase 2 training and then he'll join his regiment/corps. On average, he'll be posted every two years and you can expect him to do an operational tour (Afghanistan etc) at least once every 18mths-2 years.

"How would me and the kids fit into it, they are 4 and 2, and we are not married."

That's really up to you. As you're not married, you have no entitlement to married quarters so it'll be up to you and your partner to find somewhere to live near each posting, if you choose to move with him. Otherwise, you can stay where you are and he can commute when possible. There is support available to you, regardless of marital status (eg: if you need to ask advice then there are various organisations you can approach who will help you).

jcscot · 03/05/2010 14:49

Just to add, postings can be anywhere in the country and there are postings abroad (germany and Cyprus are the most common).

Original poster

iheartyou · 03/05/2010 15:15

Thanks for your reply!

Is it a case of choosing which career you would like on sign up, or do you get assigned one based on what the selection process shows his strengths as? He would be happy to be a chef, as he has qualifications for it.

Are there a lot of drop outs throughout phase 1 and 2 training? This is a consideration for us because he will have to leave his current job.

Do you know anything about the medicals? For some reason he is really worried they will find out that he is falling apart or something! Only family history is of heart problems but he hasnt experienced any.

Should he end up being accepted would it be worth us marrying in that case? Well I guess depending on where he is based but I am not sure I would like the be left here alone? I guess thats far in the future though!!

OP posts:

MegSophandEmma · 03/05/2010 15:27

I joined when i was seventeen. Firstly I completed a few barb tests at the recruitment office and was advised talkedinto to become a driver with RLC. I then had to complete a two day selection course at lichfield. This involved a BFT (basic fitness test) and a medical. Once all of this is passed you have to attend the recruitment centre a few more times to complete documents and take your oath to the queen. I went on to do my three months basic training at the pirbright AFC camp. It's scary stuff, but at the end the passing out parade makes up for it all. Still one of the best days of my life. After you complete basic, depending on the trade you choose, you go to a hold ing troop. Mine was Deepcut. I gained my driving licence here and C and C+E licence during a stint at Leconfield DST in Yorkshire. I decided to change trade during this time and became a port op in Marchwood, Nr Southampton. Went a way a few times to Split in Bosnia and Thesaloniki in Greece - I also had the oportunity to do a six month tour in the Falklands, but became PG with DD1 before my tour date.

This was all back in 1997 so I have no idea if it has all changed now.

MegSophandEmma · 03/05/2010 15:29

I have experience of being a wife of a soldier and a daughter of one also. If you wish to know anything.

MegSophandEmma · 03/05/2010 15:32

During Phase one and two it is hard to just drop out. It's known as PVRing and costs money to do so, so no I don't think there are many who drop out. Again though this may have changed.

That is one of the main reasons I joined up when I left school, as I had developed a tendency to start a job, get bored and then leave. With the army it is hard to do that, until you have served at least three years.

jcscot · 03/05/2010 15:35

"Is it a case of choosing which career you would like on sign up, or do you get assigned one based on what the selection process shows his strengths as? He would be happy to be a chef, as he has qualifications for it."

A bit of both, really. There are various tests that will help ascertain his suitability for certain jobs so, depending on his results, he will be given a choice. However, some trades are oversubscribed at the moment and are not recruiting, whereas others have gaps. Again, the best people to talk to are the recruiting team.

"Are there a lot of drop outs throughout phase 1 and 2 training?"

I don't know. It depends on your partner, really, whether he'll get through it or not. The fitter he is, the better but there is more to it than just fitness. Some people find that they just don't adjust well to military life. I'm afraid that the only way he'll find out if he'll get through it is to embark on the training.

As for medicals, well they're pretty thorough and even if they throw up something previously unknown to you both, it doesn't mean it would bar him from serving. I'm sure this isn't relevant to you but they will also do a full criminal records check and mandatory drug testing - again, if they find something, it might bar him from joining.

Marriage? Again, it depends on you as a couple. If I remember correctly, you aren't entitled to quarters whilst he's doing his basic and phase 2 training (which I think takes around nine months in total to complete). Once he's joined his unit, he can apply for married quarters. It's really up to you both whether or not you want to get married. It might not be the right thing for you and it's a big decision to make. It's certainly worth thinking about because there are benefits to being married (like housing for a start).

jcscot · 03/05/2010 15:36

"During Phase one and two it is hard to just drop out. It's known as PVRing and costs money to do so, so no I don't think there are many who drop out. Again though this may have changed."

This has changed. As I recall, you can drop out during basic training but it's harder once you reach Phase 2 training.

MegSophandEmma · 03/05/2010 15:43

Ahh I see. Yep there a few people who were desperate to leave whilst at Pirbright, but were unable to. Glad it's changed tbh. mind you there were times I wanted to sack it all off. usually whilst tabbing up 'heartbreak hill' lol I often remember sobbing down the phone on a sunday to my mum "I wanna comeee home" her response was "Do you want to work in a factory for the rest of your life."

I would highly recommend the army as a career for anyone, just for the pension alone

Original poster

iheartyou · 03/05/2010 16:52

Thank you both, thats all very interesting.

Already I have said that he must be 110% sure before giving up his job if he gets accepted because we just cant afford for him not to have a job.

We watched the videos on the army recruitment page and have had a good read of everything so the next step is going to the offices! He is hoping to pop down one day after work this week and then getting the ball rolling with the 2 days selection. He's got a few things to do first like going to the dentist for a check up before the medical (he has lots of fillings!) as well as upping the exercise he does already to include some running.

I am hoping he does well, kind of looking forward to a change in lifestyle if he gets through it all!

OP posts:

MegSophandEmma · 03/05/2010 18:26

Yes the running is a biggy. I know the men used to have to run 1.5 miles in 10 minutes 30 if he wants to use that as a bench mark whilst he practises.

jcscot · 03/05/2010 19:02

"I know the men used to have to run 1.5 miles in 10 minutes 30"

That's still the rule.

MegSophandEmma · 04/05/2010 07:12

Poor buggers lol

MegSophandEmma · 04/05/2010 07:12

is it still sit ups and heaves too?

jcscot · 04/05/2010 08:36

Sit-ups and push-ups. I think they have to do as many as possible in two minutes with a minimum standard of sixty.

luciemule · 04/05/2010 09:01

I would definitely get married unless there's a reason why you aren't. Otheriwse you benefit from quartering and if for example, he was posted to germany, then you wouldn't be living amongst the other wives and you may end up feeling quite isolated.
What regiment would he like to join or does he not know?
The exercise will defo be a large part of his new career but as jcscot says, there are levels they have to pass and that is age dependent so the older you get, the longer you get!
Depending on what reg he's with, you could get postings around the same area or you may be moving around a lot. Some forces people buy their own house and the DH commutes but this is more rare I think. (we do it now but I've had enough and we've moving back into quarters).You will have to think about the children and them moving. As a soldier though, you would possibly stay in one place for longer, providing slightly more stability. You/children would have to get used to deployments of 6 months.

luciemule · 04/05/2010 09:02

However, the life is amazing and the benefits far outway the negs I think. You meet so many fab people and have the chance to do things you wouldn't normally do in civvie street.

Original poster

iheartyou · 04/05/2010 11:11

He has already been doing sit ups and push ups, he uses his arms lots at work so has quite good upper body strength. I will have to start timing him

He has no idea what regiment, I dont even know what they properly are

We could not buy a house so that wont happen, currently we private rent but I think I like the idea of the company in quarters, especially during postings. Well hopefully if he is accepted his time during training we can look at getting married.

OP posts:

luciemule · 04/05/2010 13:51

A regiment is the cap badge who they servce with, for example, REME, Royal Engineers, Royal Logistic Core, Signals etc.
28 is the cut off for joining isn't it?
best of luck to your DH - sounds like he's really up for it and with you supporting him like you are, I'm sure he'll get in .

Original poster

iheartyou · 04/05/2010 14:33

Well the only thing he is actually trained in is cooking type stuff so he would be happy to do that. Otherwise he is pretty much open to whatever they think he would be best at!!

Thanks Its all a little bit scary, but scary in a good way I think!

OP posts:

Original poster

iheartyou · 04/05/2010 16:26

He is home from work, have timed him and he can easily do 60 sit ups in 2 mins, struggling a bit on the push ups, can do about 30 in a minute with no problems so he has that to work on. Decided to visit the recruitment office in a few weeks time to give him a bit extra to get some training in.

OP posts:

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