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Forces sweethearts

If you have a family member in the Royal Navy, RAF or army, find support from other Mumsnetters here.

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Original poster

DH is going to be away for most of my pg

12 replies

nomoremagnolia · 29/03/2010 13:12

He'll be away from when I'm 14 wks pg to about 32 wks - I'm not going to be childish enough to moan about it, we're all in the same boat and tbh I'd much rather he gets this out of the way before baby arrives. What I was wanting to ask was if anyone had any nice ideas about how to make him feel included in the pg whilst he's away? It's our first child and he's going to miss so much of the pg. We're already going to book for a private scan when he's home on R&R as he'll miss the 20 wk one, but I was trying to think of things I could do for him/send him to keep him feeling involved.

OP posts:

CLOVER81 · 29/03/2010 13:14

Things like scan pics and pics of your bump week by week so he dosent get a huge shock when he comes home and you are so much bigger than you where when he left. What about also sending him print outs week by week as well of what size baby is ect at that particular stage so he feels invloved as well.

Original poster

nomoremagnolia · 29/03/2010 13:28

Thank you, that's the kind of thing I was trying to think of - I don't want to go too ott and set him up for ridicule by the people he's living/working with but I also want him to feel part of the pg. It's like our wedding all over again - my Mum and I planned most of that because he was away at training!

OP posts:

mumof2222222222222222boys · 29/03/2010 13:30

The rough Guide to pregnancy has some funny bits...eg size of plum, melon etc. You could perhaps include those in your emails/ letters?

I sympathise...I was in the same boat a few years back.

good luck!

luciemule · 29/03/2010 13:31

You can attach pics to e-blueys now can't you?
What about (as well as what you tell on the phone) secretly writing a pregnancy journal with prettily stuck in photos of you and bump so that as well as having stuff out there, there'll be something at home for him to keep.
It's hard them being away during pregnancy but you're right- it's better now than once the baby arrives.

Original poster

nomoremagnolia · 29/03/2010 13:40

ooh, can you? (attach pictures that is) We have been lucky in that he's not been deployed for over 4 years, I expect quite a few things have changed since then! We are hoping he'll have internet access at least occasionally so I might be able to talk to him on msn with a webcam so he can see me. I like the idea of keeping a journal too, it will be something for us to keep too.

OP posts:

luciemule · 29/03/2010 14:03

Check out the e-bluey site but I know that last time DH was away (07) I thought you could then. Here it is:

"Yes, the Photo-Bluey feature of the e-bluey site allows you to insert a photo in your e-bluey. Login to your e-bluey account. Select a Recipient from your Address Book as usual and click [Compose E-Bluey]. On the next page click the "Add Photo to Letter" and follow the prompts to browse your PC to select a photo to insert in your e-bluey. Then Type your e-bluey as usual, Review and/or Print Preview your e-bluey, then click [Send E-bluey]."

That was from their e-bluey site.

Original poster

nomoremagnolia · 29/03/2010 14:43

oh that's fantastic, thanks

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Rocinante · 29/03/2010 16:16

I'm in the same boat - DH has been away since the beginning of Jan when I was 10wks and so has missed all the NHS scans (we did a private one just before he left though) and as he's on a "short" tour (4.5mths) he doesn't get any R&R so he's going to get a bit of a shock at my size when he gets back .

I send him an e-bluey with picture every day, admittedly of DD rather than the bump, but give him continual reminders of how far along I am now etc.

Communications are much, much better in his accommodation than when he last went out in 2006, with wireless in his room. However don't rely on webcams as the bandwidth is pretty poor and Skype is very jilted and cuts out fairly quickly .

Original poster

nomoremagnolia · 29/03/2010 18:29

OK, so the webcam might not be brilliant? Hopefully I can send him lots of pictures through the e-bueys then, I remember resorting to drawing things in paper blueys to try and explain/describe something to him before! It was 2005 last time he went away and all we had was a weekly phone call and blueys (paper and e-blueys)
It's that you don't get R&R with your DH

OP posts:

Northernlurker · 29/03/2010 18:43

Send him the receipts for all the stuff you buy - that'll keep him up to date

Seriously - your letter plans sound great and I just wanted to post and say that you sound very sensible and the work your dh is doing and the sacrifices you are both making are very much appreciated. Your baby is very lucky indeed to have such great parents.

Original poster

nomoremagnolia · 29/03/2010 19:13

I think sending him the receipts will just make him glad he's not here to be dragged round all the shops!! Though seriously I will be a bit sad to be buying everything on my own, we've waited so long for this baby I have been longing for the day we can stand in mothercare and debate the merits of one changing mat over the others!

Thanks for your nice comments it made me go all aww inside

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HomeintheSun · 30/03/2010 00:15

check out 4d scan prices, a friend of mine had one done and they got it all on dvd. When my DH went away, ds was 8 months, I measured my ds and sent him a bit of string that was the same length as him, you could do something like that around your bump, it'll give him some idea of how big you're getting, sometimes it's hard to imagine when you see pics.

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