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Forces sweethearts

If you have a family member in the Royal Navy, RAF or army, find support from other Mumsnetters here.

First deployment and I'm left with month old baby :-(

5 replies

Vickiphelps · 01/10/2016 19:44

Hi
It's my first time In the forum And I'm reaching out to anyone whose been in a similar position and can offer any advice/words of encouragement
My partner has left for a 7 week stint with the RAF today, not a long time for many I imagine but I'm heartbroken and struggling to see how I'll cope at the min and with a 4 week old baby 😔
Any advice ladies would be much appreciated

OP posts:
RB68 · 01/10/2016 20:03

Not been in so similar a position but when mine was little hubby worked away most of the week. All I can say is look at it as positive bonding time, try and just live in the moment and not worry too much about anything other than you and baby. Keep food simple for yourself, shop on line for delivery, take every offer of help at face value and make time to do something for yourself even though baby comes too - so try Mum and Baby meetup - OK no benefit for 4 week old - but lots of chat for you hopefully. But if you can't quite get out the door on a schedule just go for coffee in town, chill out and be kind to yourself.

BoaConstrictor · 01/10/2016 20:19

It must be so tough going through this? Are you on base or off? If off base, are you near a base and can you access the support there & find other people in a similar position or who have been through it recently, for example a baby & toddler group. I know your baby is too young to get anything from toddler groups, but the support would be good for you. Alternatively, could you just up sticks & go and stay with a friend or relative for some of it?
Where has your DH gone? Will he have regular internet access meaning he can Skype and can see how much the baby is changing?

BoaConstrictor · 01/10/2016 20:20

It must be so tough going through this? Are you on base or off? If off base, are you near a base and can you access the support there & find other people in a similar position or who have been through it recently, for example a baby & toddler group. I know your baby is too young to get anything from toddler groups, but the support would be good for you. Alternatively, could you just up sticks & go and stay with a friend or relative for some of it?
Where has your DH gone? Will he have regular internet access meaning he can Skype and can see how much the baby is changing?

FormerlyCatherineDeB · 01/10/2016 20:26

I did this OP for ten months in a foreign country without any friends or family - with a premature baby including our first Christmas.

It is really daunting right now but you will manage I promise you, if I got through it anyone can.

This is what i did - went for a walk every day and cooked proper nice food, for me. Slept when Dd did and ate plenty of chocolate. Grin.

I couldn't go to baby groups because DD had a compromised immune system but if you can that can only be a good thing.

You will manage I promise you, you will be surprised by your own strength when you look back. A week on you will have established your own routine and it will seem better Flowers.

scaryteacher · 08/10/2016 09:31

Use the time to establish your routine...sleep when the baby does, make sure you eat. Dh was at sea when ds was born, came home 5 days later, was home for 10 days, then back to sea!!! I did the bare minimum of housework, and looked after ds and I first and foremost. Seven weeks will go quickly honest. Almost 21 years on now, and the memory has faded into oblivion. Enjoy the time with your baby....they grow up so fast!

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