Not a sweetheart but...

[GirlWithTheMouseyHair]

My brother has just flown to Afghanistan, he is there right now doing the day of settling before they get going I suppose. It's his first tour, I moved halfway across the world a month ago and I feel so so far away from him and worried about him.

He's coming out to stay with us for 3 weeks when his tour is over and I'm just trying to think about that but the next six months feels like a long time. I know he's not my OH but he is my best friend, I don't remember life without him and feel like I've lost a limb.

Just looking for some kind words and some support I guess.

Oh poor you, try not to worry. My nephew went to Iran and I remember him being on my mind a lot over the first few weeks. He seemed so young to go :(
I felt much better when he emailed - will your dbro be able to email?
Write him a nice letter/email and take him some photos of home so he knows your thinking of him.

He thinks he will, he's convinced he'll be able to call within a few days too.

Just so far outside my own experiences I'm obviously imagining the worst, though I do feel really informed about what he's doing and where he is.

He's younger than me but always been the more responsible one. I've missed him so much already what with moving to America and now he is further away from me than he's ever been, physically and metaphorically. I'm almost more afraid of how much he'll have changed when he comes back than of him being killed, of him being deeply affected by anything he might see or do, or being badly injured. But I'm even more afraid of losing him, I don't know what I'd do.

Sorry if it isn't done to talk about this stuff, we've all been putting on such a brave face on it for the last year but now it's finally here and he's gone I'm really struggling.

Hi,

I'm new to this site and have just read your message which really moved me.

First of all, I have to say that I hope with all my heart that your brother reurns safe and sound from his tour of duty. If he was my brother, I'd be so immensely proud and privileged to call him that. Secondly, it struck me that the fears and anxieties of relatives of armed forces personnel are so rarely given a voice in the outside world. If it helps you to articulate your deepest fears, rather than bottle them up, then please don't apologise.

I am very much a supporter of our armed forces, but I sincerely hope our government comes to its senses and brings our troops home soon.

Hopefully, his guardian angel will be watching over him.

Best wishes.

I think you are entitled to call the army welfare service - they can listen to your fears and give support in a confidential manner...details below....

"Much of the support available to Army personnel and their families is given through the Army Welfare Service (AWS), a professional and confidential welfare support service for servicemen and women and their families, wherever they are located.

The Army Welfare Service has three main tasks: Community Support, Personal Support and HIVE information services.

If you wish to contact the Army Welfare Service please email: [email protected] or Telephone on: 01980 615975 or 0800 032 6443"

thankyou both, much appreciated, have spoken to him a few times since he arrived and we've been able to emai, putting together a care package for him now so feeling at least more connected

Hi
Have you signed up to the ebluey website (just google ebluey and the website will come up)? He will need to let you know his location so you can put in his address, then you can write a letter to him online which gets printed off and delivered to him in Afghan - they all like receiving letters as well as emails cos sometimes the email goes down but they can still print off the letters and carry them round and read them at any time. You can also upload photos to the letter too which get printed off as well.
My husband has been out there a couple of times so I have an idea of how you're feeling. Glad he's been able to call you and hope he has a safe tour.

My brother has just gone to Afghan on his 3rd tour, he is 23 :( so I know how you feel, you worry constantly and it doesn't get any easier, you panic every time you hear something on the news just know that you are not alone!!!

Also bizarre as it may sound, my little bro finds it easier to keep in touch via FB, depending on where he is, because then he can just write a one liner on the computer and let everyone know where he is.

Is this a possibility?

I really hope that he has a safe tour, just be careful when he comes home, he may not want to talk much and may seem different, and I'm not even talking about PTSD, may just take a while to work through his experiences.

That being said he is lucky to have someone who cares so much!!

Thank you both. He gets sent out on his first mission next week so I know I won't hear from him for a while

I know about blueys but he's being a bit funny about them, saying it'll be an issue cos I'm in America but surely it doesn't make any difference? I have his BFPO address so would that work?

DidISay hope your brother has a safe tour too, thanks for the advice re when he comes home

Girlwiththemouseyhair, having been in America sending blueys to friends the best thing to do is use the e-bluey system, it works well and you even include photos or pictures your kids (if you have them) have drawn for him. If you send a bluey then you will need to be careful as in my experience the post office will try changing the address to AFPO and then it won't get to him as the number won't exist. I wrote very large UNITED KINGDOM on it and it did get there eventually.

e blueys are excellent, you can attach a photograph to your letter and they get there really quickly. I used to be able to write an e bluey to DH at 11pm and in would have been printed and on his desk in the morning. (He did have a desk job in Bastion right next door to the post room ) If your DB is out and about a bit and away from a computer it will be the best way for him to get your letters. And I think there's something really lovely about having an actual letter to open and read instead of sitting infront of a screen. Hope he's having a good tour.

Make sure you compose your letter in word or similar and then copy and paste it into the e bluey letter page because you get timed out. It's long enough to have typed most if not all of a lovely thoughtful letter and you click to send and it has gone! I only did it once before I learned the lesson.

Thanks all, will get on eblueys as soon as I have wifi set up - he's put and about but apparently the camp has an ebluey machine