Anybody else feeling the strain lately?

[FreakOfNature]

This isn't something I wanted to post in Relationships as I think the dynamics of forces life are somewhat unique in their nature.

I can't say DH and I are having issues at the moment, but the stress of work, constantly needing to be away because they're short staffed, nobody else can do the job etc is starting to wear me down. DH is away ALOT (3 month non op tour last year, about to go away for 5 months next month) and I often wonder what the point of us being here is. I have plenty of great friends where we are (Thank goodness!) but it is still hard going sometimes. The more he's away, the more detached from family life he becomes and it's hard to get that back when there's no let up.

We have always had a fantastic, strong marriage, I understand the nature of the work and I don't mind being on my own with the kids...but there's only so much one can take [sigh]

PS MNHQ Any chance of a chocolate emoticon?

I joined as a rating then commissioned after 10 yrs as it seemed the sensible way forward at the time. If I'd stayed in the ranks I would only have 2 yrs left to do anyway and would have been able to apply for redundancy as they are looking at that rank. It has made little difference to my pay as I am on the same as the Warrant Officer who works for me
If I go now I get an immediate pension and can commute some/all of it for a bigger lumpsum house deposit
If I get promoted and go in 2 yrs that lump sum is significantly bigger
Currently on a mark time rate of pay so no incremental pay rise for past couple of years even though it only ever covered rise in 1/4 charges - this month I'm actually now being payed less than 6 months ago

at the house deposit that's exactly what I've planned for DH/my gratuity so hoping the pension changes won't affect that aspect too much. I've heard (rumour control I know!) that it's looking like no change to gratuity but the pension will be paid from age 55. I can live with that. Although it does change the plans I had, but hey ho that's life. Fingers crossed that is the plan (or better).

Just seen Flt Lt Wales is off to the Falklands - i would be a gibbering wreck if ever net him I get very star struck with z list celebs so a real life Prince

Planetpotty my retirement plan involves sending DH back to work, letting my pension cover mortgage and just working PT to make up the difference as long as between us we bring home what I earn now we should be fine

That was my plan Ahhh well

My new plan is to live to a hundred and fifteen - that'll learn the buggers!

Oh god, planet don't spread rumours like that, my heart won't take it. I should have been leaving in Sep this year, but decided to take 2 yrs VEng when they said I could stay in place. I figured that it just meant 2 more years on a good wage when the rest of the country was going to shit.

Pension plan here is to try to live frugally so I only have to go back to work part time or preferably 'mums hours'. DH has been home for the last 6 yrs but his pension barely keeps him in beer and fags (grrrr but let's not go there!). I'm going to do the Bursars course as resettlement and see if I can get a job in a school...although rocking horse shit comes to mind.

I don't know what I want - maybe for it just to be like it was before...

It is all rumour mill I've heard worse versions it's thought whatever change that comes into place will be dated from 2016 so if you reach your full pension point before then all will be as it would have been apologise if I'm teaching you to suck eggs and you're in the know with this already

I've also been told whatever happens to the teachers etc we are likely to get a slightly better deal so I watch/listen keenly.

Also that it could all come to nothing with the general election having some bearing on it. Does anyone know anything about that?

I think I just want it to be like the good ol' days too

On the upside free gong on it's way

And the daftest thing is my DH wants 2OE, hasn't been offered it (- yet - fingers crossed for this year's signal) and yet they are advertising for his branch all over the TV

Okay for anyone thinking of going outside soon get yourself on LinkedIn and start networking, one of my friends has just got a job as the "military recruiter" at amazon - lots available there!
Eve if you want to pm me I can give you my name and I can link you to him

Planet p, I am at the end of my service so not going back. The din states that you only get full mat pay if you can do a years return of service unless you are at the end of your engagement. I tried to explain to MCM that I hadn't written the din bu they had and if they didn't like it then they should re write it. So I leave a world of running around spta, deploying to hot countries and writing mod policy to one of octonaughts and 'no mummy', I am also institutionalised and feel a pang of sadness but realise that I was trying to do everything usually with my dh away and doing it all pretty badly, my kids are now the priority so hopefully I am not diluting my efforts now.

My friend has just fought this (no mat pay at end of service meaning no return of service opportunity) and won she is being paid now.

Ahhh just re-read sorry she WAS end of service point (22 yrs) and they tried telling her she would not get maternity pay they were wrong

Planet p, it's mad, your mate is the third I have heard of, if they don't want to ay us mat leave if we can't repay the year, why don't try write the in to reflect this or is it employment law. Because the din says you will get mat ay if the service don't want ou I had to poly to extend for the extension to be turned down to prove the service oestrogen want me any more. It's been Roth it financially though

Totally understand feeling the strain! We have finally taken the plunge and gone unaccompanied. I want and need to be near my family, dh had xmas leave but apart from tht has been away since sept the majority of which was covering for people...which is fine until they forget your on their fb and flaunt nights out etc when they are meant to be bed ridden! Dh has hopefully got a 2 yr posting coming up this yr then after that has decided on getting out, altho im sure that will change again next week :)

What's interesting is that dh has just got anew boss. This guy was promoted unexpectedly as although the Army have slashed the number of Colonels, they forgot (!) to slash the number of jobs - hence emergency promotions for about 16 Lt-Cols to Colonel.

They haven't yet matched up manpower/skills needed with the tasking, but have done it arse about face, so in about 18 months when the dust has settled, there will be the problem that they don't have the skills needed for the jobs, and they will want people to stay in.

They really haven't thought through the cuts yet - despite a "squeeze" on Pink List promotions (my husband was told he met the quality line for last year's List but there were no vacancies in his YOB), lo and behold, he picked up acting rank last summer and came off the Pink List yesterday.

You're right - they've cut the number of promotions/people but have yet to rationalise the postings to match. Cake and arse party all around!

same old same old.
every time. i find it fascinating that because of the postings system, no expertise in any one area remains. so the same mistakes happen again and again and again. lessons learned my arse. it's great for the experience levels and breadth of experience of the actual individuals, but it's a really crappy way of running a business.