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Forces sweethearts

If you have a family member in the Royal Navy, RAF or army, find support from other Mumsnetters here.

NPFS Help

6 replies

osd · 09/07/2011 08:54

Hi, need help as have never had to use the NPFS. My mother in law has terminal cancer we have just found out and from the sound of my father in law she has week to months, over years.

My DH is abroad at the moment and I have been updating him as he phones home on the cancer as we all thought she could beat it. But this last week her condition has deteriorated quickly, which had scared everyone.

DH wants to be home which is understandable but have just tried to ring NPFS and there offices are closed and there is an emergency number. Is this an emergency we have no idea when her time will be, it good be tomorrow or November we have no idea, but DH wants to see her and be there for his dad, so can i ring the emergency number. I am so upset and very stressed i just want to know if i can ring the emergency NPFS number. Thanks.

OP posts:
vintageteacups · 09/07/2011 09:20

Hi - sorry to hear about your MIL - you can call the emergency number and they'll advise you further. They are open 24/7.

osd · 09/07/2011 10:48

Thank you I have phoned. I am so tired of the forces. As she is not married to my FIL she is not classed as family as she is my DH step-mum and further more because she has been released from hospital care into the care of the Macmillan nurses to die, she is classed as not being in hospital care, so not receiving treatment and so therefore they will not help, so the women my husband loves and his dad who needs his support is not going to get it, because of the services lack of compassion as per usual, i hate it.

I am virtually alone, with 3 dc, trying to help his dad through this and i am exhausted. Again I hate the forces and there stupid rules and lack of compassion and care for the families of service personal.

OP posts:
MrsMatelot · 09/07/2011 18:16

Has your DH spoken to his CO/boss. It sounds like NPFS are sticking to the rules, but if his boss can spare him, sometimes he can 'persuade' NPFS, or dependant on where your DH is at the moment, I have known CO's to grant leave and allow people to fly home (although it may be at own expense)

MrsSnaplegs · 10/07/2011 20:45

Have you phoned JCCC? worth a try !

osd · 10/07/2011 20:57

Thanks no, have phoned everyone and they were all cold heartless bastards, ship is flying him home, my mil his mum but not biological has only 2 weeks left the Macmillan nurses think, so i am happy for the ships compassion and appalled at the lack of it in services that are meant to provide it, and be there for a family in crisis at the lowest point.

So my DH is coming home, but NPFS and JCCC were the worst experience of my life and when i am exhausted and very upset, and when i needed support, a kind word and help. This is not what I expected, my husbands executive officer was also appalled. But thanks for your help. x

OP posts:
MrsMatelot · 11/07/2011 17:55

So glad the ship have sorted it out and he is coming home. That was the common sense solution. I know NPFS have rules but if your DH is stressed & worried, the best place is to be home rather than it affecting his work at sea.

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