Should I give my veggie toddler fish?

[lornahr]

We've brought my 20-month-old daughter up vegetarian and - even though I've been veggie since I was 12 - I feel really nervous about it. She's generally a good eater and seems happy and healthy, but every time she refuses to eat a main meal I begin to panic that she's not getting enough protein.
She probably only does this once or twice a week, and when she does eat she eats varied and good quality food, but I have read that vegetarian toddlers must have protein at every main meal... I am a vegetarian for ethical reasons and really want to stick to a veggie diet for the whole family - but not at the possible expense of her health. Should I start giving her fish? Has anyone else been in a similar situation? Thanks for any advice you can offer!

I would give her a full, varied diet and let her make the decision to be vegetarian later on if you are worried that she does not have a balanced diet.

We will be raising our child vegan - I have done loads of research, and there is no reason our child will be deficient in anything. There is protein in every plant cell - it's actually quite hard to be protein-deficient in the West.
There's a thread for veg*n parents here - I know you aren't vegan, but it might help show you that loads of us are raising our children without meat, and our children are thriving.

I've also set up a little website full of info on where to get all your nutrients - it's still a work in progress, but if it helps you, great: here.

Abfab is right. It is really hard to be protein deficient in the developed world. If you are worried about it, try combining proteins by making things that have a grain protein with either a pulse or a dairy one. That way, she is getting complete protein even if she only eats a little.

Things like mac&cheese, rice pudding, cheese on toast, lentils and rice. Eggs are also a very good source of protein.

For what it is worth, I have been vegetarian for 30 years and none of my children are. I brought them up eating everything and left the choice up to them, just as I made a choice for myself. They now eat a mainly veggie diet but with some meat, because they like it. But they never felt the need to rebel or sneakily eat meat or anything like that and they all have a very balanced view of food.

As above, she'll be fine.
I'm veggie but nobody else in my family is. My DS isn't either - I don't cook meat for him (apart from fish fingers occasionally - I don't cook anything resembling 'real' meat or fish!) but my Mum minds him 2 days a week for me and she wanted him to have anything she was doing (rather than a special diet) which is fair enough. Result? He's a total carnivore. He's only 2, so this is not something deliberate- he just really, really likes meat. Which is fine.
He won't be getting any from me, though!

My children were totally vegy until about the age of 2 when I started them on fish. Not because of the protein, but because of the oils that are needed in brain development and I couldn't be sure I would get it right with pulses etc.

Mine know they have a choice to eat meat or not with no judgement from me - but I won't be providing it. They haven't chosen to yet.

It's entirely up to you, but I think you're worrying unnecessarily, especially since you say that your daughter generally eats well, has a varied diet and is healthy. It's overall diet that counts, rather than each meal.

As AbFabT and Stressed have said, it's hard not to get enough protein, especially when you have a balanced, varied diet. Don't forget that carbohydrates such as bread, rice etc are reasonably high in protein. Quinoa is a good quality 'complete' protein and easy to add to meals.

The Vegetarian Society has useful info on its website, which might set your mind at rest. The page on protein is here:

www.vegsoc.org/info/protein.html

Re the fish oil thing, you can get veggie omega oils etc. from flax and linseed oil amongst other things. Also evening primrose oil and starfower oil are good sources of EFAs.

My son is 4y9m and has never eaten meat, including no fish, and he's perfectly healthy. ) Try not to fret about it!

I'm a non-fish eating veggie, but my two DCs do eat some fish, for a number of reasons - DH was not veggie, so they are a kind of compromise; they have never taken to eating many beany things (though they do eat lentils and tofu), and I'm not keen on giving them too much of the processed soya/quorn meat-substitute sort of thing, so fish is an easy source of concentrated protein and is generally healthier than relying on cheese all the time; it makes life easier when we are out or they go round to friends for tea - there's usually some kind of plain fish thing on pub/restaurant menus, and nearly everyone has fish fingers in their freezer. Also, they were born and spent their first few years in about the most fish-eating country on earth (Japan), so avoiding fish was hard. Ethically, I have problems with both the dairy industry and the fishing industry, but for me going vegan would just cause too many problems with eating out/travelling/visiting friends.

Having said all that, I don't think you need to worry about feeding a child fish purely for health reasons - they can get essential oils and protein from plenty of other places.

Thanks for your (mixed!) messages, everyone. I appreciate you all taking the time to reply.

I'm like earwicga,in that I have given my dds fish,partly because like you I got paranoid about protein (DD1 never ate a whole lot as a toddler)and partly brain development,ethically I would prefer to be vegan,and my own diet is largely vegan with some locally caught fish,the girls are largely veggie,but with some fish.DD1 is a natural veggie really and would happily not eat fish at all,but does eat it sometimes,and DD2 is a bit keener,partly because I don't think she realises that it is a creature yet.I was veggie for most of my life,but I started eating fish when i was pregnant because I had major cravings for meat.I'm still bf,but might go back to being veggie when I stop.We are lucky in that we live near the sea and river and so we can buy local line caught fish.

Thanks hellymelly - it's a minefield, isn't it! I used to be a vegan and only stopped because I had allergies to so many other foods that I was hardly eating anything... Would like to go back to it if I could. I hadn't thought about trying to get local, line-caught fish. Maybe that's the way forward.

Yes , that is tricky for me too as I'm intolerant to gluten and eggs/cows milk.the gluten one being the worst at the mo.It is hard enough when you have to cut out groups and I think sometimes you just have to do the best you can while also looking after yourself,and I have found that while pregnant and breastfeeding I seem to really need high quality protein and get more run down and tired if my diet is too restrictive.It is hard to feel your toddler is eating well as they can be so picky!