What does your 4 year old eat?

[mrsharrycunningham]

My (just) 4 year old DS is a really poor eater. He hardly likes anything - especially anything involved with a main meal. Things he used to like (like a roast dinner) he now wont touch at all. A typical day would be:

Breakfast: 1 or 2 bowls of cereal and a slice of toast.

Snack: Biscuit or yoghurt

Lunch: Bread and butter with maybe a fish finger or a slice of ham or maybe a piece of cheese.

Snack: Apple or strawberries

Tea: Either bread and butter again or maybe a slice of homemade pizza (only with ham and cheese). Yoghurt or rice pudding or pot of cold custard (??!!).

I have tried giving him a cooked meal but he point blank refuses to try anything and always ends up getting upset, then I get cross and frustrated. I figure at least if he eats something it's better than nothing. But I'm really worried that he's not getting enough. He's a pretty healthy boy - a bit prone to colds but nothing else. Meal times just seem to be a bit of a battle. DH says not to make an issue out of it as it'll only make him worse. Apparently he was a bit like this as a child but now eats pretty much everything which I find slightly re-assuring.

Does any of this seem normal to you?

Mine is 4.5 and jsut coming out of a fussier phase. I would stop the snack whilst he is not eating. I also found myself getting cross and pandering.

What i found worked is to jsut present whatever was for dinner, and then when he says not liking/ trying etc i just brezzily say 'that's fine but there is no telly tonight if you dont at least try it.' And follow this through obviously.

This does seem to have worked. It is v. hard not to get wound up over it though. I also found that if i pottered about in kitchen and let them get on with it rather than sitting with them (i have a 2.5 yr old also) than that stopped me nagging them.

Its v. frustrating especially when they turn up noses at stuff you know they do like. FWIW mine suddenly seems to be eating loads again and happier to try things, i think he is having a growth spurt which helps.

Oh yes. Please try not to worry. From the foods you list, it sounds like he's getting all the nutrition he needs. Common colds tend to be a constant issue with children and aren't indicative of a compromised immune system - in fact they show that the body is reacting correctly to the threat of the virus. I think it's a good idea to be fulsome with the praise when DS does eat something new, but not make a big deal of him refusing to eat. My DD (3) has only recently started eating a broader range of foods and there are still many things she just won't touch. You can try just saying, "Oh well, you might like it another day." This encourages them to keep an open mind about foodstuffs rather than setting in stone, "I DON'T like tomatoes" for example. I did this when I was little and then I was shocked to find out that I did actually like mushrooms. Make sure you enjoy your meals too!

I think a lot of children go through fussy phases and prefer to stick with what they know. You could try offering some colourful raw veggies to augment the fruit if he's not struck on cooked meals. Carrot, cucumber and pepper sticks & things like cherry tomatoes are big favourites with a lot of children.

Other than that, I think your husband is about right. Keep offering new things, lots of praise when they try something new, no big deal if they don't.... but no alternatives. And little friends can be very persuasive when it comes to trying foods. If you invite a few round and your son sees them eating different things he'll be likely to copy them.

Good luck

Thank you so much for your comments. I feel a bit happier knowing it's a common problem!

Sounds like the exact same diet as my DD - bread, cheese, ham, yoghurt!!! She won't hardly touch anything else!

My son eats almost anything and wonder if its down to weaning him on the same foods as we eat. I always refuse pudding if he doesnt touch the main meal. I do the same with my 1 yr old too - if he doesnst eat main then he's not hungry and I do the its tough routine back.

I think children around can influence them too I have noticed if a friend comes over and sayes he doesnt like/doesnt want then he just mimics. Are there good children/friends that do eat well and get them to sit by him and eat you may find he'll just want to copy them?

I get my son involved with cooking loads I talk him through the process and get him to prepare. We make alsorts - bread, cakes, main meals, he likes to peel spuds and chop. At nursery they are good too they talk about good foods and bad foods and he likes to talk about that and takes an interest.

I find 4 year old really testing (strangle stage)too luckily my husband is hard and wont put up with any messing so that back up helps. Bribery works well and tell nanna you eat that and she going to buy you xyz (within reason).

I give them the meal I've decided if refused bread and butter is the only alternative and a yoghurt for pudding. Doesn't sound like he is filling up on snacks so why stop them.

Is he filling up on juice/milk or something else?