dairy,egg and nut allergy

[josiejump]

My friend has 3 boys age 4,2,and 8 months, the middle child being the only one who suffers from allergies. He is now at the age where he is asking for the same food as his brothers, but not old enough to fully understand the consequences of eating them. My friend is wondering whether it would be fairer to make the rest of the family follow his diet or does he just have to accept that he can't have all those tempting foods? Is there anyone who can advise please?

There are lots of alternatives that she could be giving him - it is a hassle I know, but there are things there. I think it is best to just stick with it - it won't be long before he understands, and life being what it is I feel it is better that he understands that he CAN'T have the same as everyone else, rather than making the other children eat a special diet. Not least because many of the alternative foods are very expensive.

I have a friend with one child who follows a normal diet, the other is allergic to pretty much everything - nuts, eggs, dairy, gluten, quite a lot of fruit, sure there is other stuff too. He is 3, and is fairly aware of the fact he must be careful about food or it might make him ill (and some of it does make him VERY ill), so I expect that it won't be long before your friends child is able to understand this too.

I think you are most probably right Oakmaiden. I think he was doing fine until his little brother started on solids, and now that he's eating chocolate cake and the like, is finding it hard being the odd one out. I imagine he'll have a few mega strops over the issue soon, but as you say, will soon come to understand it.

My youngest child is dairy intolerant and has been completely milk free from 2 years of age. She is very understanding of her problem and will tell people 'I can't eat that, its got milk in'. I often give her something different to the rest of the family but if I am baking I make things that are suitable for her to eat (eg use non-dairy marge in cakes). The only time she ever gets upset is if other children are eating sweets and I don't have an alternative for her (I usually carry something suitable just in case).

Your friend would probably find vegan cookbooks useful as they are dairy free and egg free. A good recipe book for cakes is 'The Cake Scoffer' by Ronny and only costs about £1.25 on Amazon.

Forgot to add - Kinnerton have just introduced a dairy free, egg free, nut free chocolate bar. It is in a black plastic packaging and I've heard that it is available from Sainsbury's but I can't remember the name that they manufacture it under - The Safe Chocolate Company I think. If you get in touch with them they might send you a free sample.

Thanks PamT, will pass this info on to her.

My sister's ds2 (3 in September) is dairy, egg, wheat, nut etc intolerant. Her ds1 is 4 and she has tried for them all to eat together where possible but only works in practice some of the time. She constantly tells ds2 that milk, choclate, etc will make him very sick and he seems to understand. He can have certain lollipops and jelly and she always buys him exotic fruits where possible to "make up" for perceived treats. We recently spent some time with them and he seems to understand and is very accepting. She actually thinks this age is the easyist as she has most of the control. She dreads when he goes to school!

So my advice is your friend's ds probably can understand alot if it is explained in simple terms, and she can ensure he doesn't feel too left out by her careful planning of alternatives. It probably isn't necessary for your friend's family to all eat the same but every so often would be great for everybody. There are now plenty of great alternatives available in health stores and supermarkets so it is also worth shopping around. Their are also support groups to help - sorry don't have uk details as sister lives overseas.

Good luck to your friend and nice to see a friend who is concerned.

The Inside Story magazine is really helpful for people with multiple allergies. It is only available on subscription and is fairly expensive, but in my opinion worth paying for. I'm not too sure about the URL but if you search on google or Jeeves you will probably find it. They do regular food reviews and have recipes that are free from lots of allergens.