Food battles

[shandybass]

Hi
I'm fairly new here and have just spent ages trying to work out how to start a thread. Anyway I'm here now. I was wondering having had ongoing food battles with my 3 year old dd, what advice you would give?

DD eates 3 different meals, pasta with Dolmio spag bol sauce only (not any homemade version ), veg soup, the same one always and chicken nuggets and chips. I offer her other stuff and she refuses to even have it on her plate with the stuff she does like and if its all different she just takes one look at it and walks away.

Other than this she will eat Organix muesli bars and Gingerbread biscuits sometimes 3 or 4 a day, yoghurt and occasionally fruit.

Should I do the, offer her what were having even though she refuses it, or stick with the 3 meals she will eat? And should I cut out the snacks altogether, even though their not really bad?

I've been trying to stay fairly relaxed about her eating, but every now and again it really gets to me, especially as I come from a family who would all eat whatever pretty much.

Help?!

welcome to posting

does your dd like chocolate? milk? which fruit?

Chocolate? Yes, but she only has it occasionally, mainly from MIL.

And yes she'll drink milk morning and night, but recently she's been asking for some a couple more times in the day but I only give her a bit.

Fruit, it varies, but she's pretty good with fruit and will generally have strawberries and kiwi.

Thanks for a reply, was feeling a bit alone out there.

I was going to suggest other types of fruit dipped in choclate - the chocolate usualy helps to get them to try the fruit.

Also milk smoothies to try diferent fruits before going to other things.

using things she likes to temp her with gently.

Do you eat when your dd is eating? I used to say oh this is so very tasty and try to temp them, then tease them on no you cant oh go on then have a little...

I think I'm ok with the fruit she eats, but I wonder would it work with veg dipped in chocolate?!

I do eat with her but she's way beyond the trying to temp her with the 'MM' word. Drawing attention to the eating seems to raise the defences and stubborness in her.

I'm also wondering if the damage is done now as even with other children around she will just say where's my food as in 'I don't eat that' if their eating something that's not on her list of 3. The meals she does eat are so specific, I think that's my problem, not so much the nutritional value, which I think, is ok, not great, but survivable, (if that's a word).

Sorry, I'm mean when it comes to food.

I'd give her what you're having and eat with her. So your meal plan during the week will include the things she likes, but other things too. And I find the organix bars and biscuits a bit too sugary for more than once a day. Nowt wrong with a treat, but it might be quelling her apetite so she doesn't mind avoiding new foods. For that reason, I wouldn't give her chocolate too often either (though, god, strawbs in chocolate are to die for) LOL at veg in chocolate!

Welcome to MN by the way.

Whenever I read these problems the children are still often drinking milk - milk is a food as well as a drink so children often fill up on milk. How much time and effort can you give to the process. If she is your only and you have the energy then I would be quite strict and ride out the tantrums and tears, she will eventually eat. I would only give fruit for snacks.

I recommend a good book - Meals without Tears. Intrestingly it says by 3 they don't really need snacks like babies as they can eat enough at meals to keep themselves going.

Thanks for your comments, I think you're both right and now I've put it in print I'm thinking yes she has way to many treats and I always thought I would be strict and no nonsense regarding food.

Also the milk intake was bothering me as she didn't used to have more than 1/4 a cup morning and night. Although the increased intake has only been in the last 2 weeks and the food issues have been much longer than that.

I was expecting to have cracked the food issues by nowit as I've been on maternity leave with dd2 for the last 8 months. But I guess I hadn't anticipated the extra work and chaos a second baby brings.

This is also a worry as when I go back to work in a few months, albeit part time, Mum and MIL who will be looking after them, aren't at all strict. Help.

Crash course in strictness.