My DD doesn't eat - help!

[RambleOn]

My DD (2.7yo) was a good eater until she turned about 2yo. Now though, she is worrying me with her lack of eating. I kept a diary this week and it has shocked me.

Mon: Breakfast, two small bites of toast and jam. Nothing else all day.
Tues: Lunch, three strawberries.
Weds: Lunch, half a cheese toastie (ie. one round of bread)
Thurs: Dinner, one bite of shepherds pie.
Fri: Lunch, small slice of garlic sausage.
Sat: Breakfast, three cornflakes, no milk. Lunch, ten raspberries (but only when I put them on the ends of her fingers!)
Sun: Dinner, one kiwi fruit.
Today: Nothing at all.

She still has 3 follow-on milk feeds a day (3 x 5oz) on the advice of a paed dietician. This was to boost her iron intake as she is allergic to egg.

I offer three nice meals a day, offer pudding after dinner, eat with her, eat the same as I am offering her.

I have started trying her with things that she used to like but were treats iyswim, raisins, cocktail sausages, etc. I have also tried picnics with the teaset with teds, eating with other kids, spoon feeding her. Nothing works.

I know kids won't starve themselves, but surely this could be causing a serious problem if it's left to go on any longer? Her nappies are dreadful and causing quite bad nappy rash.

I am tempted to drop the milk, but I can't get an appointment with the dietician til October to ask him. And am scared that it won't help.

Help!

just wanted to reply as I know how stressful the eating thing is

to be honest my first thought was drop the milk, ds1 is 3 this week and loves his milk but I'm having to restrict him to one beaker (about 6oz) downstairs before bed otherwise he just fills up on it and refuses food, he is a very lazy eater, could you get the iron from green veg and meat? (I know thats providing she'll eat them)

I'm not an expert (no where close!) so its hard to say drop milk when your paed has suggested it, could do do one big milk feed before bed rather than 3 in the day? that way she still gets the boost but maybe will be a bit hungrier to eat?

if you do do that don't expect it to work straight away, you'll prob have to wait it out for at least a week and be confident that she won't starve herself, it will be very emotional, obviously I'm talking complete nonsense if she has any other health worries or is at bottom of her weight for her age, in that case you really need to push for an appointment sooner, could your HV help you out?

sorry not sure if that helps or not

Hmm, I would say drop the milk too but again perhaps you need to double check with a paed. Cows milk is surely fine at this age, no need for expensive follow on.

And hard as it is to have perspective in these situations (I know!) it will get better. This is from one whose dd was pretty similar at that age and now eats virtually everything and asks for seconds. They're just not very hungry around two and they're trying to assert their authority, as they get older their appetites seem to increase. Good luck

My DD was an appauling eater - started off badly with weaning and has only recently started eating 'properly' since starting school and having school dinners. I did notice an improvement with her once I managed to take a step back and stopped 'stressing' about it so much - easier said than done I know! Does your DD just not appear to be hungry, or does she appear to be dislikeing what you are giving her? If it's any help, I think my DD genuinely has a very small appetite (or maybe it's just comparing her with her pig of a big brother lol), she is better eating smaller 'meals' more frequently - some might call it snacking, but I've tried to consider a balanced diet over the whole day (although when she was smaller, I tried to thnk about what she ate in a week!). I just break the 3 normal meals into separate components, and give the bits to her throughout the day. I also tried to relax about how she ate - using fingers rather than cutlery and not necessarily at a table, so as to make the whole thing more relaxed. I would agree with Insy that she does seem to be having alot of milk and if she only has a small appetite, she probably has no room, or need, for proper food. Can you get some advice on the phone, if you have to wait so long for an appointment? I would be tempted to drop a feed - is she too young for vitamins to compensate? Hope things improve, I know how worrying and stressful a non-eater can be.

You totally have my sympathies as I'm going through a similar thing with my own daughter of the same age. Eating has always been a bit of a battle, health visitors giving advice, regular weighing up to 1yr and worrying about her centile chart... but she picked up and has really good spells and then goes off food again and just nibbles at what feels like crumbs for days.

We still do three meals a day, most days she'll eat something at every meal, plus healthy snacks, even if its about 1/3 to 1/2 of what her friends manage and only after a fair amount of cajoling/using a reward chart. Some toddlers do have small appetites and are grazers, not big meal eaters and mine is one of them. She just doesn't want to sit there and eat when she could be playing - once she's taken the edge of her hunger its game over! She's developing fine and I've recently discovered several friends with similarly aged children are going though this too, all of us frustrated but doing our best.

On the milk issue - we do an am and pm 5-6oz bottle of full fat cows milk (organic) and sometimes an afternoon one pre- or post-nap but I'm trying to cut that out and she doesn't have that at nursery two days per week. We stayed on follow-on milk until she was about 18 months because of her smaller size and appetite, then switched. I'm sure someone could advise you about that over the phone or approach your health visitor, RambleOn? Or just give it a go for a few days if she's ok with dairy anyway and see if she takes to it. The follow-on stuff costs a fortune day in, day out and my LO loves her 'grown-up girls' milk now.

Sounds like you are doing a grand job: its really hard but you're not alone! Good to see other mums have come out the other side of this, thanks! Keep us posted on how its going.