Vegetarian parents, carnivorous kids....

[Catherinedeneuve]

Would love some advice on this from any kind people out there. Me and dh are long standing vegetarian (plus fish) eaters. Was always determined not to force views on the children when they were old enough to make a choice, and used to let them eat whatever at friends' houses, but wasn;t going to cook it.
That's kind of fallen by the wayside in recent times, and although I don;t (can't...literally, am sure I would poison them) cook meat as such, I do heat up cooked chicken and sausages for them. Eldest son has now become extremely difficult about wating any veg substitutes and younger won;t eat cheese. is getting very hard to find a non-fish protein we can all eat!

I have seriously considered eating chicken again (which I really don;t want to do - has been 25 years) because I'm worn out with trying to please anyone and reckon I could make casseroles and healthy stuff, but Dh wouldn;t do this, ever. Does anyone else have this situation and do you have any nice recipes that can be easily adapted, so chucking some quorn in one lot and chicken in another? This is harder than it sounds unless it is a sort of quorn cutlet/piece of chicken plus veg meal.
Would be so grateful for advice, especially if anyone else in this situation.
Thank you.
PS We eat together, so I try to avoid cooking different meals if poss...

How old is the child who wants to eat meat? Old enough to cook a side portion for themselves to go with the main (vegetarian) meal?

We do a lot of combination meals, bits and pieces, to suit the 5 of us with varying tastes. I like spicy curries, risottos, chillis, Mexican, stir fries. Dp and occasionally dd1 and dd3 eat those, but I do side orders of unspicy chickpeas or blander sauces for those two dds.

And dd2, hmm, well I lecture her about healthy eating and hope for the best in the long run.

I do find the attitude 'vegetarians are very unbending' rather strange. I think what Pisces actually means is that her brother and sil are unbending - please do not tar all of us with the same brush!

I am vegetarian and I have been for 35 years. I don't eat fish - ie I am a full vegetarian. I cannot stand to be in the kitchen when dh is cooking meat - he had mince on yesterday and it very nearly mean me sick. However, ds is being brought up eating everything - dh cooks organic meat and fish for him, and I have got to the stage where I can warm up a portion from the freezer for him and make sure he eats it (he's 3.5 and gets a bit tired so sometimes struggle in the evening unless assisted!).

However, I recently impressed my dh by managing to roast a chicken and get some of it off for ds. I can also manage to so sausages in the oven. Luckily I have some great stoneware which means I can throw it in the oven and not have to be in the kitchen while its cooking - just when it needs to come out.

We do lots of veg stews - sometimes with beans - then I might have some cheese on top whilst ds and dh have sausage, bacon or similar.

The only thing I do one thing for that I will put some meat on one half would be pizza - I know that one of your dcs doesn't like cheese, but if you make it yourself you can ensure some bits are cheese free and some bits are meat free. As long as you are using a cooked meat there shouldn't be any significant transfer of juices - although you would want to cut the two halves apart early on to avoid 'contamination' between the meat and the vege bits when you are cutting.

Ds horrified mil the other day by saying 'I like lambs. I eat lamb and pig and cow and sheep and deer and chicken... I don't eat dogs' !!!

Hee hee!! Great line!

Thanks so much everybody. There are some great ideas here and I really appreciate everyone's help.

The little one will eat pizza cheese, so we're fine on that. Won;t countenance any kind of white sauce or cheese sauce though,. which is a shame because I love 'em. Reading these makes me realise they're a bit crap with vegetables too. Some vegetarian I am.
Will eat red peppers, peas sweetcorn, butternut squash OK, plus carrots and brocc if gun to heads. But I think I'm gong to start making more casseroley and tomato-ey based things and chuck meat into one of them.
Can I just ask everyone here what sort of chicken best to get, if I'm going to be chucking chunks into a stew? Should I get cooked chicken breast or something and then add some at the end?

By unbending I mean that if you invite vegetarians around for a meal you do the good hostess bit and cook them a special meal without meat. However if you go to their house it doesn't work in reverse!

But PC, it's not the same thing....no meat eaters are actually against lentils or quorn for ethical reasons are they?

That was the point that I came in on CatherineD-I said it was a breath of fresh air that OP was letting her DCs decide! Most vegetarians decide for their DCs that their DCs should be against it for ethical reasons. I think she is to be applauded for not trying to control what they think as well as what they do. I don't expect my vegan relations to cook me beef but I don't think it would hurt to get a bottle of milk in when children are visiting or have a cheese sandwich. There was a time when mine were very small that I had to take food for them and I think as good hosts they could have been slightly more accommodating.

Australian Woman's weekly has a great cookbook called something like "The almost vegetarian" which is all receipes that can be adapted so they are half with meat, half vege.

im veggie with veggie child.the way i see it is im healthy ,theyre healthy.they get everything they need in veggie diet so why feed them something im not wanting to.im not forcing my views on them.ds1 eats meat.he knows what it is,where it comes from and how its made.

so if they want to be veggie why not let them?

Mine don;t want to be, Cheeseandsprouts. That's ma problem!

Thanks for book rec, Milkmade...might try and get that one.

Does Quorn still have battery-farmed eggs in? If so then I'm against it on ethical reasons

I am veggie but DH and DCs aren't, I tend to just roast or panfry chicken or whatever and throw it in the top of whatever we are all having or just give it to them on the side. A bit lazy and probably boring for them but they eat it and don't complain!

Apparently, no, Quorn does not use battery eggs.

I think they stopped a while back. Some new survey says its very nutritious actually, which is good news because I eat tons of it.
But a friend once went to the factory where they make it and said, 'you'd never eat it again if you saw what it looked like' which is a bit off putting, to say the least!

One of my friends used to work in factories in her student holidays, and used that as a reason not to eat cheese, meat, cakes, and all sorts of other food. It seems that if you visit any food factory you never want to eat the product again.

Not that I want to defend quorn, I could live without it, but my fussy family would struggle. DP likes it too, he's a real Fake Meat enthusiast.

Quorn gives me a stomach ache - but the dds really like it.

I don't like quorn because of the flavouring that is put into it. I'm quite happy to eat things like that for the protein benefits - but I don't want them to taste of meat as that's why I don't eat meat in the first place (or one of the reasons!).

Pisces - again, I want to pick you up on the 'most' - what basis have you got for saying this? There seem to be quite a few of us chipping into this thread who 'allow' our children to eat meat if they want to. Having said that, I do think that it was/is unreasonable for your ds/bil not to get at least milk or cheese in for your dcs when going to visit - surely this wouldn't be the end of the world - particularly as you are going to otherwise have to take it so that it will be eaten in their house whether they like it or not.... We have a friend who comes to stay who is allergic to cows milk so we always ensure that we've got some goats milk in for him - and goats cheese etc. Its just good manners - particularly if you want your guests to be in a good mood...

I tried to have ds1 be a vegetarian like myself (about 25 years now as well) but he is allergic to every known form of vegetarian protein. So have been cooking meat (poultry, fish, lamb) for him for years now. At first it made my stomach hurl but I try to disassociate myself from it.

I have been cooking seperate meals for almost 10 years though....

I'm one of those veggies who actually likes the pretend meat type stuff, mad though that is! I even like that really rubbish bacon stuff

I think if my Dh was a meat eater, it would be easier in some ways. He has stronger feelings about it than I do and I seriously considered just eating bloody chicken for an easy life at one point, but he was horrified. Once I'd sort of allowed myself that thought, I realised that I REALLY don't want to.

I think that it does have a role to play - and I certainly wouldn't want to criticise anyone for eating it - its just that I, personally, want my food to not pretend to be something it isn't - and I certainly don't want it to taste of meat.

I don't want to impose my views on others in the main which is partly why ds is being brought up eating meat some of the time. The only thing I do insist on at home is that we only get good quality meat, preferably organic, and that dh (and ds) are not allowed to eat continental veal, fois gras or caviar.... I do try to insist that the kitchen door is kept closed when dh is busy cooking though!

Oh yes, I would have to draw the line at stuff like veal. That makes me feel quite militant, even to think about.

I would prefer to get only good stuff too, which causes me problems when I only cook the sort that comes in cutlets or whatever. I do try to use M&S ones, because I imagine they have better origins.
Hmm, think I'm going to have to start properly cooking this stuff!

I don;t think I could bear to cook mince, but luckily the children don't like mincey stuff anyway. Or beef. Or pork.
Think it's going to be pretty much chicken and sausages!

I am veggie, DH is not and we are bringing the little un up omnivorous.

I managed to cook lamb mince for him the other day, but I think that anything else might be beyond me.

If we have people round we DO have two dishes - one veggie and one meat. Although if we were an entirely veggie household, that might be a bit risky for the guests. I wouldn't be tasting it for seasoning!

I'm honestly worried about poisoning them too! I learned to cook when I left home, and turned veggie the same time. So I've never really cooked meat. I once had to throw away a whole tray of M&S chicken things because I was convinced they were pink inside, but were in the oven so long they were practically incinerated!

Another veggie here, with carniverous DH and DS. I must say, if you do get used to cooking meat, it's the easiest thing in the world to get right, compared to veggie recipies, though it's a bit odd not to taste while you are cooking!

I have a slightly different approach to the one you're asking for, Catherine. I spend part of one day every week cooking up meaty casseroles / stews, making meaty sandwiches and freezing the lot for DS to have in small portions in the week, and for DH to have as a 'change' from my veggie standards. But then I just have the one toddler to cater for so I think that is easier.

I do that all the time catherine - overcook meat. You need to get a meat thermometer.

Yes, that's what I should buy for sure...will it say on the thermom what temps are needed for different foods then?
CK, I'm cheered by what you say about it being easy!