Hi Ainsmum - I have posted on your 'grommets' thread too.
Appently there is no scientific evidence that reducing dairy will help your dd but plenty of anecdotal success stories. It has certainly helped ds.
There are lots of alternatives to try for milk and yoghurts but cheese is hard to replace. However the proteins in cheese and yoghurt are different to those in milk so worth trying various things. SOya yogs taste ok. Milk alternatives are goats, sheep, soya, rice and others. Make sure they have added calcium on the label.