I don't know what to do about dd and food tonight. I don't want to get cross, but I am feeling flustered. Please help me not get it wrong.

[BroccoliSpears]

Dd is 2.

Yesterday: Birthday party at lunch time. Dd wouldn't come and have supper later. I stupidly got into a big stand-off situation. I genuinely thought she needed to eat something good for her. She finally ate a teensy weensy bit of supper (not even a mouthful - barely more than a lick) and promptly threw up all over the place.

This morning she wouldn't eat breakfast. She managed to get hold of a piece of cake while I was sorting out her brother and ate that to no ill effect. She didn't want lunch. She has a couple of bites of marmite sandwich. Has had a very little bit of fruit this aft and a rice cake. This eve she asked for supper and wanted pasta or pizza or something hot and cooked. There is a lovely lentil and mash pie on the table. She is refusing to sit at the table. Refusing to look at it or try it (she loves it). She wants to eat crisps and fruit.

I want her to JUST BLOODY WELL SIT AT THE TABLE AND EAT HER BLOODY SUPPER. But I do realise this is because I am tired and stressed and her baby brother won't stop crying and I want her to eat something.

I've been very calm so far and she doesn't realise I'm a twitching wreck. I've just asked her a few times to sit at the table and have her supper. If she turns that bloody television on again I swear it's going out the window.

Tell me what to do.

just leave it there for her if she wants it
and then if she doesn't want it, DONT CARE

honestly I have been where you are twice, I didn;t do what I am sugestying you do and I am still paying for it

later before bed when she is hungry offer a banan or some cereal and put her to bed
I know that it isn't easy

but your jib is to offer good food
she will choose to eat it or not
you can't make her and of you try it will become a battle

oh and breathe, do you have any wine?

She is two, I would give her some fruit. Maybe offer her some toast and chunks of cheese too. I would rather she ate that than nothing at all.

Nothing bad will happen to her if she doesn't eat the pie.

Have a cup of tea and take a deep breath! You are doing nothing wrong, kids can be picky!

just leave her. just once won't matter. better than a battle. she won't starve.

set your kitchen timer for 5 minutes. Tell her that you havde done so and, if she hasn't come to the tavle by the time the timer has gone off that her dinner will be in the bin and she will have nothing to eat before bed.

(set the timer for 10 minutes)

You know that you need to show her you're not bothered, and it sounds like you're doing well so far.

I have tried giving small portions to my 2 year old dd, and think this works to a certain extent.

Don't offer crisps or fruit, but don't enter a stand off - you will be making a rod for your own back.

When I have had this with ds, I have offered 1 alternative - like toast. Something simple, generally healthy but a bit boring. However, I know that quite a few mners have pointed out in other threads that offering alternatives is not always possible and can be very costly.

Unless she has health issues, she will not starve herself, and if you do not offer her anything exciting, she might decide to eat what she has in front of her. [hopeful emoticon]

Stay calm and try and relax about it. NOt easy though.

oh, meant to add, before bed, offer some toast and milk.

Don't care whether she eats or not. Obviously you do care, but pretend very hard that you don't. Even better, if you can, leave the room. If she won't come to the table, explain to her that if she doesn't sit down, there will be nothing and she will have to go without until breakfast. And mean it. I promise, she won't starve herself.

Personally, I wouldn't offer something before bed, or offer an alternative (I'm 'ard, me!). Because they realise very quickly that there is an alternative to the healthy meal you have procided.

Btw, I know this is much harder than it sounds. I speak as the mother of an incredibly fussy-eating dd. I have learnt all this by bitter experience.

Just wanted to add my mother's saying "It's a mother's job to provide tasty, nutritious meals. It is not a mother's job to make anyone eat them"

She truely really won't come to any harm at all to miss a meal or two.

Be calm - drink wine.

It's typical 2 year old behaviour ime.

Try not to let her see that you are gettng wound up and avoid making an issue of it (threats, bribes, timers etc).

Infuriating, isn't it? DD (also 2) does this. Or she decides she doesn't like something which she's eaten loads of the day before (or else eats what she's turned down the next day). I often send her to the CM's with the same as what she's turned down... and she eats it there [why don't we have a "stay calm" emoticon??]

I have no advice to add, only sympathy - there are some good suggestions here.

I don't care whether or not dd eats her supper.
I don't care whether or not dd eats her supper.

Well I've just completely ignored the whole issue and concentrated on giving ds his instead. Dd is glass eyes in front of some CBeebies crap. I bloody hate that television. We never used to have it on but since dh has been away I just find I struggle to manage without it. The price is a square-eyed child who would rather watch Big Cook Little Cook than do anything else.

Why did she throw up yesterday? Is she ill?

Perhaps she really doesn't need any supper? She doesn't seem to have had much of an appetite all day.

Unplug the TV to stop her from switching it on again.

Right. Am going to run a big bath and plonk us all in it.

I'm not going to mention food again. If she says she's hungry I'll give her something.

sounds like a plan broccoli

Sorry, I missed the tv bit.

I half-heartedly restricted tv for my two when they were younger (in that there were no set times when they could or couldn't watch it, just didn't turn it on sometimes).

Now at 7½ and nearly 4 I find they switch it on for a few minutes and then just wander off and I end up turning it off as it's broadcasting to an empty room.

But if you are on your own atm I can see why you need it (don't stress about it though!)

She went to bed with no supper. She didn't mention it.

I thought she threw up yesterday because she was overtired and had eaten too much crap. Maybe I was wrong, maybe she's got a mild bug. Ahh well. Hope she's back on form tomorrow. As many of you have said, she won't starve.