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Meatball Tagliatelle

26 replies

BigFatBully · 18/07/2025 01:57

MEATBALL TAGLIATELE
Serves 1 Person
Tagliatelle: 500g Tagliatelle, cooked in 1.4 pints water, 2.25 tablespoons salt, 2 tablespoons black pepper, 2.5 tablespoons olive oil
Meatballs: 400g Minced Beef, 3 eggs, 18.75 tablespoons breadcrumbs, 2.25 tablespoons olive oil for the mixture, 4 tablespoons tomato puree, 4 tablespoons garlic powder, 3.5 tablespoons onion powder, 4.5 tablespoons marjoram, 4 tablespoons parsley, 3.5 tablespoons chilli powder, 2.5 tablespoons thyme, 2 tablespoons salt, 2 tablespoons black pepper, 1.5 teaspoons sage
Sauce: 4 Tablespoons Oil for frying, 1/2 Red pepper, 1.5 onions, 6 cloves garlic, 2.75 tablespoons tomato puree, 400g chopped tomatoes, 1 stock cube + 1.2 pints water, 2.25 tablespoons salt, 3 tablespoons black pepper, 3 teaspoons sugar, 4 tablespoons parsley, 2.25 tablespoons thyme, 2 teaspoons chilli powder, 3.75 tablespoons paprika, 9 tablespoons basil, 2.25 tablespoons oregano, 2.25 tablespoons lemon juice, 1 bayleaf

Serve With dressed (340ml oil, 3 tablespoons parsley, 3.5 tablespoons thyme, 6 tablespoons oregano, 5.5 tablespoons lemon juice, 2.75 tablespoons black pepper, 3 teaspoons chives) salad (270g lambs' lettuce, 140g rocket leaves, 6 cherry tomatoes, 3/4 red onion, 2 tablespoons sweetcorn, 4 slices cucumber, 3 black olives. And 3 slices Garlic Ciabatta.

120g Grated Hard Cheese For Topping

Method: Mix the meatball ingredients together. Use fingers to integrate the ingredients in to the mixture. Massage the seasoning in to the mixture. Stir well. Fry in the oil for 11 minutes on a high heat, stirring thoroughly twice. Fry onion & red pepper in the oil for 6 minutes on a high heat, stir thoroughly four times during this process. Add the garlic & tomato puree and tease with the spoon, fry for 70 seconds. Add the chopped tomatoes and remaining ingredients for the sauce - including the meatballs, stir well and simmer on a medium-high heat for 10 minutes. Stir thoroughly and simmer on a medium-low heat for a further 12 minutes. Stir thoroughly and simmer for a further 3 minutes.

Meanwhile, boil the tagliatelle (fresh) in the water on a high heat for 20 minutes, stirring thoroughly 3 times at evenly dispersed times. Drain.

Chop the ingredients for the salad, making the salad leaves approximately 3.1 inches wide and slicing the cherry tomatoes in half and the olives too. Slice the onion finely. Mix the ingredients for the dressing in a bowl, stirring thoroughly.

Heat the garlic bread in the oven at 170degrees for 11 minutes, turning over half way through.

Mix the sauce and pasta together. Top with the hard cheese towards the centre. To the side, add the salad and garlic bread.

This recipe serves one person. You can multiply the ingredients depending on how many others will be dining. I am a vegetarian, so would use good quality vegetarian mince instead of beef, but this recipe will work great with beef mince.

OP posts:
FlipFlopShopInHawaii · 18/07/2025 10:00

500g of pasta and 400g beef... for 1 person 🤯
That would feed everyone in my house, including 3 hungry teenage boys, with left overs for my lunch the next day (probably just the salad 🥗 😜).

Chemenger · 18/07/2025 10:14

If my salad is 3.2 inches wide will this spoil everything?

After I’ve boiled the tagliatelle for 20 minutes should I just throw it out, because it’s going to be very overcooked.

Is the salad meant to float? 4 slices of cucumber and 340ml of oil?

Did you really enjoy this recipe @BigFatBully or did you maybe just blindly cut and paste from an AI source?

MassiveOvaryaction · 18/07/2025 11:23

That's an awful lot of food for one person Shock

Jellyrollquiltmom · 18/07/2025 11:32

That recipe is wrong on so many levels!!!
Shock

Flannelfeet · 18/07/2025 11:37

Bloody hell, this has got to be a joke....all that salt? Nevermind all that is only for one person!! 🤣.

OldGreyBoots · 18/07/2025 12:29

The more I read, the better it gets 😂 for some reason it's the 6 tablespoons of oregano in the salad dressing that got me the most Grin

PractisingMyTelekenipsis · 18/07/2025 12:32

This is the most precise recipe I have ever seen !
Did ChatGPT write it?

Hoppinggreen · 18/07/2025 12:33

Its Spam
Which I don't advise you use in Meatballs by the way

Chemenger · 18/07/2025 12:34

PractisingMyTelekenipsis · 18/07/2025 12:32

This is the most precise recipe I have ever seen !
Did ChatGPT write it?

I think there is no doubt that it did.

EmpressaurusKitty · 18/07/2025 12:38

I expect the meatballs are really made from spam, not beef.

Chemenger · 18/07/2025 12:43

Just spotted that the ingredients list has cooked tagliatelle, which is then boiled for a further 20 minutes. This so called recipe just beautifully illustrates why AI is dangerous when used unfiltered.

EmpressaurusKitty · 18/07/2025 13:32

Chemenger · 18/07/2025 12:43

Just spotted that the ingredients list has cooked tagliatelle, which is then boiled for a further 20 minutes. This so called recipe just beautifully illustrates why AI is dangerous when used unfiltered.

A lot of AI spam is pretty stupid.

Chewbecca · 18/07/2025 13:36

🤣🤣🤣🤣
So many points to pick up on, I give up and just 🤣🤣🤣😂😂

EmpressaurusKitty · 18/07/2025 14:23

I’ve just noticed the underlined bit at the end about the OP being vegetarian & using good quality veggie mince ‘but this recipe will work great with beef mince.’

But no reference to potential differences in the cooking time.

FawnDrench · 18/07/2025 14:45

What a strange, rather random context-less opening post!
I wonder where it came from….hmmm…

EmpressaurusKitty · 18/07/2025 15:31

FawnDrench · 18/07/2025 14:45

What a strange, rather random context-less opening post!
I wonder where it came from….hmmm…

I can’t imagine….

Flannelfeet · 18/07/2025 15:38

BigFatBully · 18/07/2025 01:57

MEATBALL TAGLIATELE
Serves 1 Person
Tagliatelle: 500g Tagliatelle, cooked in 1.4 pints water, 2.25 tablespoons salt, 2 tablespoons black pepper, 2.5 tablespoons olive oil
Meatballs: 400g Minced Beef, 3 eggs, 18.75 tablespoons breadcrumbs, 2.25 tablespoons olive oil for the mixture, 4 tablespoons tomato puree, 4 tablespoons garlic powder, 3.5 tablespoons onion powder, 4.5 tablespoons marjoram, 4 tablespoons parsley, 3.5 tablespoons chilli powder, 2.5 tablespoons thyme, 2 tablespoons salt, 2 tablespoons black pepper, 1.5 teaspoons sage
Sauce: 4 Tablespoons Oil for frying, 1/2 Red pepper, 1.5 onions, 6 cloves garlic, 2.75 tablespoons tomato puree, 400g chopped tomatoes, 1 stock cube + 1.2 pints water, 2.25 tablespoons salt, 3 tablespoons black pepper, 3 teaspoons sugar, 4 tablespoons parsley, 2.25 tablespoons thyme, 2 teaspoons chilli powder, 3.75 tablespoons paprika, 9 tablespoons basil, 2.25 tablespoons oregano, 2.25 tablespoons lemon juice, 1 bayleaf

Serve With dressed (340ml oil, 3 tablespoons parsley, 3.5 tablespoons thyme, 6 tablespoons oregano, 5.5 tablespoons lemon juice, 2.75 tablespoons black pepper, 3 teaspoons chives) salad (270g lambs' lettuce, 140g rocket leaves, 6 cherry tomatoes, 3/4 red onion, 2 tablespoons sweetcorn, 4 slices cucumber, 3 black olives. And 3 slices Garlic Ciabatta.

120g Grated Hard Cheese For Topping

Method: Mix the meatball ingredients together. Use fingers to integrate the ingredients in to the mixture. Massage the seasoning in to the mixture. Stir well. Fry in the oil for 11 minutes on a high heat, stirring thoroughly twice. Fry onion & red pepper in the oil for 6 minutes on a high heat, stir thoroughly four times during this process. Add the garlic & tomato puree and tease with the spoon, fry for 70 seconds. Add the chopped tomatoes and remaining ingredients for the sauce - including the meatballs, stir well and simmer on a medium-high heat for 10 minutes. Stir thoroughly and simmer on a medium-low heat for a further 12 minutes. Stir thoroughly and simmer for a further 3 minutes.

Meanwhile, boil the tagliatelle (fresh) in the water on a high heat for 20 minutes, stirring thoroughly 3 times at evenly dispersed times. Drain.

Chop the ingredients for the salad, making the salad leaves approximately 3.1 inches wide and slicing the cherry tomatoes in half and the olives too. Slice the onion finely. Mix the ingredients for the dressing in a bowl, stirring thoroughly.

Heat the garlic bread in the oven at 170degrees for 11 minutes, turning over half way through.

Mix the sauce and pasta together. Top with the hard cheese towards the centre. To the side, add the salad and garlic bread.

This recipe serves one person. You can multiply the ingredients depending on how many others will be dining. I am a vegetarian, so would use good quality vegetarian mince instead of beef, but this recipe will work great with beef mince.

Have you booked your appointment for mounjaro yet? 🤣

HaroldMeaker · 18/07/2025 17:30

3.5 tablespoons of chilli powder 🥵

ClearlyAGiraffe · 18/07/2025 17:36

The whole thing is nuts. The meat to tomato ratio is insane. One tin of tomatoes but 500g of mince.

EmpressaurusKitty · 18/07/2025 17:48

@BigFatBully are you around?

Flannelfeet · 18/07/2025 20:21

EmpressaurusKitty · 18/07/2025 17:48

@BigFatBully are you around?

Shes in a food coma!! 🤣

Fleur405 · 18/07/2025 20:24

Tagliatelle is certainly not the correct pasta to serve with meatballs.

HateThese4Leggedbeasts · 18/07/2025 20:24

3 tablespoons of chilli powder will add quite the kick assuming I survive eating all that salt 😜

SpottyAardvark · 18/07/2025 20:27

4.5 tablespoons of marjoram? That has to be some sort of AI nonsense, because nobody who has ever made meatballs in tomato sauce would ever come up with such a daft recipe.

PractisingMyTelekenipsis · 18/07/2025 20:56

If it wasn't for the fact i cant afford to waste food I'd almost be tempted to make this and see what it's actually like!

Although there's no way fresh tagliatelle needs to be cooked for 20 mins! More like 3.

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