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Original poster

My 20 month old barely eats anything....

38 replies

strawberriesandcream01 · 13/05/2008 21:26

She is 20 months, weighs about 21lbs. She barely eats anything. Things she does like though are fish fingers, smily faces etc which I am very reluctant to feed her!

I make homemade fish cakes, can I make some kind of homemade smily faces?

Anyone else have this problem? I make all these yummy meals and she wont touch them, she also takes one bite and spits the whole lot out and refuses to eat it.

OP posts:
yogimum · 13/05/2008 21:32

my ds 21 months is exactly the same! Is living on yogurts and fruit pots at the moment, wouldn't eat those a few weeks ago. I make very healthy fresh organic food and he won't even taste it., he pushes it away and says "finished". I hope its just a phase.

eddiejo · 13/05/2008 21:39

It will be!
Most children this age go through this horrible stage but it is particularly upsetting if they have never been good eaters.

I know it's really difficult but the only way to go is positively. If you know they eat or have in the past eaten a food- give it to them.

Make sure you give off no negative body
clues (relax shoulders!!)

Talk together praise if they eat any of it or even touch it.

When you've finished yours - take all plates away (after a reasonable length at the table).

Don't offer alternatives or pudding.
They will soon eat the next meal.

Mine have both been there.(ds1 age5 and ds2 age just 2)

If you think about it - what goes in their mouths is the only thing they control and they're very clever at knowing you are frustrated and upset.

MuffinMclay · 13/05/2008 21:41

Ds1 (just 2 years) eats next to nothing. Most evenings he takes one look at the plate and pushes it away with a loud 'nay'.

He has phases where he'll only eat certain things. It was bananas a few weeks ago. At the moment it is cereal, or bagels with peanut butter, or jelly. And that is it.

Stupid HV gave me a hard time about it today. She reckoned that if the veg were presented in beautiful shapes or patterns hed gobble them up. He would not.

eddiejo · 13/05/2008 21:47

Abosolute rubbish. I think less hassle more hustle with veg!

hairtwiddler · 13/05/2008 21:52

It is rubbish. I made fajitas last night with DD (2 and a bit). She was very excited about spooning on the mixture. She sprinkled on her own cheese and sauce, and rolled it up. Oh yes it was a huge hit. Did she eat any of it? Not a piece. She pushed it away and demanded fruit instead.
I gave no reaction. I'm the queen of no reaction.
It's a phase....
BTW, does anyone know how long this bloomin' phase lasts? About 10 months now I reckon.

Original poster
strawberriesandcream01 · 13/05/2008 21:52

Hi everyone, nice to know im not the only one!

If I gave DD a plate of veg or fruit she would love it and gobble it up but that has hardly any caleries and I want her to put on abit of weight!

OP posts:
yogimum · 13/05/2008 21:54

I wish ds would eat fruit and veg. He will eat a bit of banana if I'm lucky.

eddiejo · 13/05/2008 21:54

Not usually that long!!

Some 'people' would say the stage goes back to hunter and gatherer days when toddlers ate only what they knew to be safe and refuse to try anything new at all.

They apparently get over it by seeing you eat a food approx 17 times before they will try it!

eddiejo · 13/05/2008 21:55

Think what they eat over two weeks. i bet they tick all the food groups in one way or another.

hairtwiddler · 13/05/2008 22:00

Oh mine does, and I don't worry about her nutrition. I worry about whether she'll ever eat a meal with us again!
In answer to OP, I would say don't get sucked into the whole smiley faces thing. Way too much effort! Just keep offering regular stuff, don't react to her spitting it out, and give praise for trying something new, even if it's just a bite. I'm hoping this will work for me eventually.

keevamum · 13/05/2008 22:01

My 2 year old refuses everything except baby jars. She is only little aswell. Any ideas or do I just stop giving them to her.? It seems so harsh as she really doesn't eat anything else.

tiredandnowty · 13/05/2008 22:02

My DD ((22 months) is going through a "pasta" phase. She will eat anything as long as it is pasta !!!! .......... Or strawberries.
Anything else is hit and miss, one day she'll wolf something down, the next its as if its poisonous !!!

eddiejo · 13/05/2008 22:04

You need to get her off'em.
Easily said. Just substitute one meal a day to start with or mix them with more lumpy real food.

She will get used to it.
There aren't enough calaries in them so i bet she gets tired!

tiredandnowty · 13/05/2008 22:05

I've given up with HV's telling me she needs to eat more etc, it is nigh on impossible to force her to eat when she doesn't want to. As long as she is growing and is healthy and active and developing, who cares what the scales say !!

eddiejo · 13/05/2008 22:05

Only them!

Shitemum · 13/05/2008 22:09

If she'll eat fruit and some veg and pasta and cheese/yog then I think that's fine. It's true that you need to look at what they eat over a period of several days to see if it's balanced, rather than just one day.

Also don't stop offering something just because she's spat it out 20 times. The 21st time she may just eat it!
Try not to mix things up, keep foods seperate and they are more likely to pick out what they like from the plate.

GColdtimer · 13/05/2008 22:11

This "phase" has lasted about 10 months with us too. And how I laugh at my smug former self who proudly told people dd would "eat anything". It all changed when she was about 14 months, she is now 2. She would live on milk and fruit if she could. Well, actually, she pretty much does live on milk and fruit with a few bowls of porridge thrown in. I try not to worry about it but it is so hard.

eddiejo, please tell me your secret for being "queen of no reaction".

eddiejo · 13/05/2008 22:16

It wasn't me!! It was the hairtwiddler!!!!
I am def reaction queen!

Do get a grip on them sometimes but ds1 is excellent at changing the topic away from his food. and often makes ds2 laugh so much he gets hiccups so then neither can eat their dinner.

SazzlesA · 13/05/2008 22:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

eddiejo · 13/05/2008 22:18

Keevamum - does she eat sweets and crisps?
Just wondering if she has a swallow thing going on.

hairtwiddler · 13/05/2008 22:18

That was me! Grit your teeth and smile! I just say, 'Ok, DD is not hungry', then make yummy noises about how nice mine is. She gets fruit or yoghurt if we're having it. Otherwise nothing. If I'm feeling a bit soft and know she hasn't eaten much, she gets bread and butter.
I sob silently so myself as I scrape the uneaten food into the bin though.
Just waiting for the big breakthrough but have nasty nagging feeling it will never arrive.

eddiejo · 13/05/2008 22:21

Oh you're so good. Am usless esp. when tired after work and just want them to eat so they can stop the hunger moans!!!!

BigHotMama · 13/05/2008 22:23

Thank god its not just my ds then

eddiejo · 13/05/2008 22:23

Got to go. DH making comments like remember me etc!

Nice talking to you all!

GColdtimer · 13/05/2008 22:24

I apologise hairtwiddler, I admire your resolve, i will try to sob silently into the bin instead. It is so awful isn't it, you cook, you serve, you eat and they push it away with a "don't like xxx" or "finished" after they haven't eaten a mouthful. DD does have days where she eats really well and I think we have turned a corner and then it all goes to pot again.