3 year old with very limited diet

[scabbymeister]

Hello, I'm a newwy!
I am at the end of my tether and I thought it might help to get advice from those who understand. My daughter is nearly three and has a very limited diet, the problem is that she will not even try anything new, even the things that she used to like. The only fruit and veg that she will eat are apple and brocolli but this is under duress. Tea times are very stressful and over the last couple of days I have stopped her having anything else unless she eats the meal (or makes an effort) but she is quite happy to eat the meat off the plate and then go hungry! I feel really guilty and I have started giving her a multi vitamin. When she was a baby she would eat any wierd and wonderful combination but she has got steadily worse since she was two. Any suggestions for a mum who feels a bit of a failure? Thanks

I'm a member of this club with my 2.3 year old. Every now and then she surprises me and tries something new but mostly she eats the same meals at the same times every day. I don't know if it's because she's under 3 but that tactic of saying 'it's this or nothing' just doesn't work. She doesn't eat anything, quite happy about it, and goes to bed with no tea. She doesn't then 'make up for it' the next day either. We don't have mealtime battles as such she either eats something or she doesn't and she's not bothered either way. It's infuriating!!!!!!!!!!

I'm a member of this club too! DD is 3.11, and a very fussy eater. Like some of you, we hide veg in bolognese and cheese sauce, but otherwise rely on fruit and a multi vitamin to fill the gaps. Luckily she loves milk, and also has yoghurt at almost every meal.

Mealtimes are often extended sessions (no longer tense as I've resigned myself), but if I want her to eat more than a few bites, I literally must sit with her and feed her. (Is this a way of holding me captive so she's guaranteed my attention?) If left to her own devices she'll eat enough to take the edge off her hunger, and then stop.

Must admit to feeling frustrated when we're invited to a friend's house for tea. Inevitably their child eats everything unaided and unprompted (including vegetables), while mine jumps around completely uninterested in food - even though it's mealtime and I know she must be hungry. I've resorted to taking a few snacks everywhere with me (raisins, apricots, granola bar, etc) so I can get something into her stomach and we don't have a hunger induced meltdown.

There's some really good advice here. I have a very fussy 18mo so I dread to think what it's gonna be like in another 18mo! A few tricks we've started using of late have improved meal times. 6/7 nights a week we eat together (me, dh, ds) and dh & I just chat away about anything (usually end up spelling what we've just seen ds put in his mouth!) and it's amazing how ds 'gets on with it' when we're (wink) 'not looking'. So ignoring helps sometimes (sometimes it turns into playtime though..) Also we do the 'I don't think ds can eat that daddy, do you?' 'Hmmm, I'm not sure mummy, do you think he can?' and it becomes a sort of challenge to him and amazingly he's tried some new foods that way. Also, we're lucky in that he LOVES yoghurt and if he doesn't touch or just picks at his dinner he doesn't get one, but does if he eats half. This seems to have sunk in and he accepts the 'deal'. It's the only time we make an issue of what's happened at the table. Oh, and definitely dips, dips and more dips. Ds eats carrots now (occasionally) as some eventually gets nibbled off after dipping into homemade sauce or ketchup... We're trying more 'dip sticks' and he's eaten some sausage and bean sprouts. We also try to make it fun and embarrasingly I found myself saying 'please don't eat me' in a high pitched voice to ds whilst we were at a friends house for lunch over the weekend as he's gotten so used to me doing at the dinner table he wouldn't eat some cheese before me saying it!! Anything to get a bit of food in him!!

Good luck and yes, you're definitely not alone with this one!

Ds (age 3) will only eat Scooby Doo pasta shapes, processed cheese slices, banana smoothies and peanut butter sandwiches provided they are on milk roll. I hide egg yolks in the pasta shapes for iron (if you keep stirring it just thickens the sauce - lumps would cause mutiny).

You can bake cakes with extra egg yolks in them if your child will eat cake. These are a good source of iron.

all my three have been thru various fussy stages and dd at 3.5 still playing the game. ds2 however made me realise how different children have different tastes - ho loves things like mussels,prawns,crab,snails in France on hols,mushrooms but wont eat normal food like potatoes,cheese,pasta, tomato sauce,baked beans. about 18 months ago I made the decision to pretty much cook what I like - curries,chilli etc and just serve it up and all eat together. somedays 1 child has a few mouthfuls of rice only, other days everyone eats really well. then to stop us using pudding as bribe everyone always has to have a piece of fruit before pudding - if ones being fussy this could just be a couple of slices of apple/banana then we all have pudding. i was also told to look at what they eat over a week instead of a day - often you find they have had a fruit and veg binge one day then a carbohydrate day the next

My dd (5) is a nightmare. She has a very limited diet and seems to want to eat small amounts often so I am just letting her have what she wants and when as long as it is healthy. On an average day she has about 2-3 bowls cereal, 2-3 yoghurts, apple, orange, grapes, peanut butter sandwich on brown, raisins, small choc bar. Her main meal is either sheperds pie, spag bol, veggie burger or pizza. She will not try anything new and I was getting so stressed I am now trying to go with the flow...I am sure alot of this is down to attention seeking

I am so with you all on this one. My 2.8 yr DD won't eat potatoes, or any fruit and veg except the occasional strawberry and raw carrot. This is of course except when she goes to nursery on Monday and Wednesday mornings and she will then eat vegetable curry or sweet & sour vegetables - how do they do it? At home, I am resorting to skinning, de-seeding and sieving tomatoes so I can mix it up with cheese and a drop of milk and butter to hide it in cheese on toast, pureeing cauliflower and broccoli to coat super-noodles with then covering that with cheese and ham, and mushing up fruit to put in yoghurts, ice cream, angel delight and to make ice lollies with.

OMG Nirvana!!!!

can i join too...

DD will eat sweetcorn (but ONLY on the cob - nose firmly turned up at kernels), apple, pear, grapes (all only sometimes) pasta, cereal and milk. and mostly only if I feed it to her (which I only do if she hasn't eaten for a few days or is a bit off-colour generally)

that's it!

I had the chef at nursery accost me the day of her Xmas party to commiserate and wonder at her restricted diet. This came after the carer I checked with everyday had reassured me she ate everything in there (carrots, casseroles, potatoes - things she won't touch)- even standing firm in the face of my incredulity. So, if told your little one is gobbling up all in sight at nursery, do take it with a liberal dose of salt as mine weren't telling me the truth (for whatever reason, possibly just that DD's keyworker not paying attention)

I'm trying not to stress about it. I had horrendous anorexia from my pre-teens (fine now but only after a long struggle) and remember food being a real battleground in our house (mostly cos I wanted to eat what my mum considered "too much" iirc )

it's really hard but I'm hoping it's a phase and hoping against hope no.2 (due end March) will be different in this regard

sympathy to all who find themselves in this particular club....

I think I'm going to try homeopathy and see if that makes any difference - thanks for the tip

its a phase i swear with a lot of little ones..i used to nanny and my kids would eat anything i put in front of them and everyone knew (word got round) that my kids loved mushrooms, spinach, cabbage,pickles all the not norm foods but of course wouldnt eat anything decent for their parents so when it came round to having kids of my own i thought hey ive done this lots of time no probs!!!!! anyway to cut a long story short my son has a severely restricted diet(special needs) we did gosh but they couldnt help and along came my daughter who has the most adult taste(calamari being her favourite) pickles, spinach, dried fruit and nuts by the handful..doesnt like biscuits and cakes until she gets to 3 1/2 yrs old and now eats half of what she used to like( i dont like that anymore mommy) and eats like a sparrow! however if i let her get on with it and choose what food she would like for meals etc..she will actually balance her weeks dietary needs out perfectly all by herself..one day carbs the next just aday of veggies(often preferred raw) then a day of fruit...so dont stress and just look what theyve eaten over a period of a week and im sure youll realise theyre o.k.. by the way my son is the size (and strength of a rugby player) and very healthy and on the top centile for weight and height but doesnt eat anything yet my daughter frequently gets colds and is so petite with long legs and a miniscule waist.. so you cant judge...hes also had full medical checks for minerals etc levels and theyre all perfect ,we ve been told that children can survive very nicely on next to nothing... so dont panic and start enjoying your mealtimes together.

Marthamoo, LOL at 'arsenips

I haven't read all the messages yet (I intend to) but my dd (>3) is also very fussy and we try to make her interested in food. She currently likes 'Penne, Fusilli & Spirali' whereas she always refused 'pasta'. We also make up pasta sauces with stacks of veg in which sometimes gets eaten which we call 'special spirali sauce'.

We also always ask her what she wants as she would rarely eat something we just plonk down in front of her.

Another thing which dh swears works but I keep forgetting to do is that he'll wander over to where she's playing about 10 mins before dinner time and say 'spirali' and then walk away. 10/10 times he'll go back later and ask her what she wants for dinner and she'll say whatever it was he'd just said!

I also recommend the M&S kids range. They are good at hiding veggies in their sauces etc so good for easing the conscience slightly even though they are quite expensive.

Forgot to say we give her wholewheat pasta for the fibre.

Oh my goodness chicaguapa - mind games!

Actually I think that is quite ingenious. Tomorrow I am going to mention broccoli 10 mins before tea!

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