please help - at my wits' end with dd 11 months and refusing to eat anything except formula!

[Soprana]

Sorry if this is going over old ground, but I'm new here...

My 11 mo dd started off being weaned enthusiastically - ate everything I put in front of her. I have always prepared food fresh. For a while she was eating baby cereal and toast or pureed fruit at breakfast, followed by, for example, fish pie or cottage pie for lunch and fruit and yoghurt for dinner. Oh and formula to top and tail the day. Gradually though she's refusing everything now in the way of solids apart from fruit and yoghurt. She won't eat anything I prepare for her so I spend hours thinking of what to make, shopping and cooking, only for it all to go in the bin. I'm totally out of ideas and worrying she'll be malnourished if she doesn't eat some meat and veg.

Can anyone out there suggest anything?

PLEASE?

i had this problem with my dd1 at exactly this age. i think it is quite common. i would just keep on offering and really DO not make a big deal about it. just give her the chance to eat it, dont offer an alternative. she will not starve herself to death. it is sooooo hard and i did not cope v well with this for my dd1. but she is now nearly 3 and eats fine. so it will pass i am sure if you do not make mealtimes a battleground. i also have a dd2 now 11 months and she seems ok as long as it is pureed still! so i have more issues there. really do not worry is all i can stress. she will be fine i am sure. let her eat her fruit and yoghurt for pudding. it is so common at this age. she will come out the other side. i keep on repeating myself but i want you to be reassured that lots of them go through this phase. keep offering, take away if refused. and keep on coming here to ask for advice if you are struggling with it. i have a friend who made a big big big issue with her dd at this age and she now still wont eat a thing when at home with her mum. all weekends she just eats milk til she goes to nursery again during the week.

Phew, thanks. It IS very worrying and I'm doing my best to not make a big deal of it but it's not always easy. This lunchtime I tried two things - baked potato and cheese and beans (refused point blank) and her one-time favourite, broccoli and cauliflower cheese (one spoonful then spat out). She's hungry and grizzling now and I'm holding out but it's really hard to think of her as going hungry. I hate being hungry personally and find all this food refusal bewildering as I love my scoff! The thing that worries me is if I always just give her fruit and yoghurt when she's hungry will she ever agree to eat anything else, and can she get malnutrition from this? I'm worried about the sugar content of the fruit too... Is this not too carby a diet for her or is this only a problem for adults. God, I'm just worried full stop.

DS goes through similar phases (well phases makes it sound like it's not normal, he's more off his food than he is on iyswim)
He also loves something one day and then refuses to touch it the next.
How long has she been doing this? Could she be teething?

I think you may be pandering to her too much, hence she feels she has the choice to spit it out or not.

A child will never starve themselves, but may be incredibly fussy if their mother fusses too much.

It's also good yo leave out little bowls of raisins/ aplle chunks/ cheese etc for them to pick at as and when they like.

Instead of doing loads of shopping and then having it go to waste, how about you start of small again, with say some finger sandwiches that have different fillings in, maybe do some homemade pizza fingers using homemade tomato based sauce so you know there is no salt content etc?

Thanks for all the suggestions. Unfortunately she won't eat the sandwiches I make either. Have tried toasted and untoasted, cheddar, cream cheese, chicken, brown and white bread, also tried her on bits of cheese and raisins. Only thing she'll eat is apples, bananas (with and without yoghurt or fromage frais) and rusks.

Everything else is refused. Yesterday I made some pasta in tomato sauce. She ate two bits and then refused the rest. I have a feeling pizza would be the same thing. Anything tomatoey tends to be spat out pdq.

I thought for a while she was teething but she's just had quite a big teethe (iyswim) and I think the teeth are on a break now. I'm trying not to fuss. I don't force her and I don't rush about trying new stuff. Just calmly placing it in front of her for her to try herself and when she struggles helping her. Nothing seems to work.

Glum.

soprana, not sure if this will help, but i see your dd loves yoghurt (so does mine, same age) I often use yoghurt in food, and blend it with potatoes and leeks, or whatever, if she is struggling eating something, i add more yoghurt on the top which she loves nad then generally eats quite a bit of the food.
I'm sorry i dont have more advice, my dd also started off enthusiastically, and now goes through phases, and i just stop when she indicates no more. (so not to make it an issue). could you try with the warmer weather having a picnic and leaving food around to see if this will entice her to eat, out of her highchair and somewhere different?

I had a similar thread (also with 'wits end' in the title!) when dd was 11 months, only I was moaning about lots of other things too!

I know you've only mentioned a handful of specific things, but everything you have mentioned her refusing has been either 'wet' (sauce on pasta, sauce on veggies) or bread based. Even now, at age 2.2, dd prefers 'dry' food, and will rarely eat bread based food. Have you tried offering just the broccoli and cauli without a sauce on it?

I agree that you need to stop pandering to her by giving the fruit and yogurt all the time though. Be prepared for a few tantrums, but sit it out and you will most likely see the difference within a week or two.

And don't go to lots of special effort with meal prep - just offer her some of whatever you're making for yourself, and either she can eat it or she can go hungry (you can always give milk later in the day if necessary).

We're going through this at the moment as well - dd is about the same age

A couple of things which sometimes help (but often don't) is giving her spoons to hold. Its almost like her hands are occupied and she forgets to close her mouth. I've also resorted to feeding her in front of the tv (very bad mum ). She just seems to not want to sit still in her high chair because there's too many other things going on so having some distraction can help

i also would not worry about the content of fruit - it is fruit and it is very healthy and very good for her. the phase will end. have you tried chunks of cheese? my dd at this age loved it. but the more you worry the more it will show. my dd2 has days when she doesnt eat but as i am busy with dd1 too i havent the time to worry as i did with dd1 and i am sure this is why she is a better eater- or it hasnt turned into an issue for me at any rate. so just dont panic. the formula ahs soo much good stuff in it that she needs she will be fine. my gp told me that they will absorb the nutrients they need from what they get. eg if they are receiving way more vitamins than they need they will pass it out but if receiving less they will absorb more of them if that makes sense. my main concern at this age was iron so i gave pureed dried organic apricots in her morning porridge which apparently is a good source of iron....

DD went through this too and was eventually down to fruit, yoghurt and bread/butter - and not always bread and butter! I confess I did not handle this as well as I might have done and things got heated, but thankfully discovered mumsnet around that time and got loads of good advice, so it didn't build up into something terrible.

The tip about plain yog on top of vegetables worked for me for about 2 meals, but do try it, at least she'll have had something! DD liked those organic cheese fingers - little moos? - or Sainsburys are now doing their own version. Also dried apricots and raisins for iron, she didn't mind them.

If it's any help, she's now 3.2 and will eat most things (although we still have the odd 'yuck, no!' moment!)