quick easy catering for awkward mixed group

[RitaSueandBobtwo]

We are having visitors (8 plus two dogs one ours and one theres so will likely be chaotic). I really hate cooking even if I have plenty of time and because of the day they have decided to visit I will be really time poor so quick and easy is everything. What would you do? I don’t mind buying all or most of it but just haven’t a clue what is easiest and would go down best? The last time I catered for them in summer I did a mixed buffet with different pizza, quiches, meats, salmon, various nice salads, bread, mini samosas, rice, crisps and lots of different picky bits. I spent ages shopping, cooking, prepping and laying it out. I had said I would do lunch when we spoke on the phone two days beforehand and they said that was great and agreed to keep in touch and to phone when they were 30 minutes away. One of them texted us at various intervals about the time they would arrive etc. They eventually arrived over two hours late and had called in for a sandwich on the way (which they failed to mention) and hardly ate anything at all.

1. We don’t have enough space/seating to seat everyone at the table together only have one oven.

2. Group mixed in ages (late 50’s-age 10), mixed tastes, appetites, mainly meat eaters, one vegetarian with a small appetite who will eat some fish sometimes, two children fussy eaters prefer bland beige food and three with huge appetites who can eat for England etc

Chilli, pulled pork, curry, stew, ham

I'd bung a bean chilli in the slow cooker and serve with baked potatoes. Bowls of grated cheese, coleslaw, salsa so there's other options than chilli.

I’d not bother after their previous rudeness

Thanks all for ideas so far@ThatPirateLady I am tempted. It was a boiling hot week as well last time and I so struggled but at least I had time.

My DH hates baked potatoes with a passion.

This time I am taking a days had leave the day before to clean and do any shopping as we have to set off early on the day they are arriving and won’t be back until mid afternoon (when they are arriving). So I don’t even mind cheating and buying all or most things as easy is priority.

id be going to Iceland - mini sausage rolls, mini pizzas etc

green salad
pasta salad
crusty bread
hummus and crudités

Do you know anybody with Costco membership? They do good large pasta bakes, sandwich platters, pizzas and so forth

I'd still do baked potatoes I'm afraid and buy baguettes as well and husband can have those . Or cheese and potato pie (not pastry version) .

Anything you can eat with just a fork. I would do a big mixed bean chilli with rice, grated cheese, sour cream, guacamole, salad, tortilla chips, and chicken drumsticks, serve bbq separately for fussy ones, perhaps chips too to appease children/big eaters. Everything easily forked or pick up with hands.

Vegetarian sausages used to make a mixed bean and tomato casserole, cheap and easy to prepare and timing is not important. They can all eat the same meal, you could have a couple of packs of microwave rice to fill up the hungry teenagers. If the fussy children don't want bean stew they can have toast.

After last time, I wouldn't be making much effort for them.

We have done crusty rolls with roast beef/pork before with bit of salad and coleslaw . Veggie sausages in rolls for those who want those . Nothing fancy and seemed to go down well. Could add a tray of roast potatoes to eat hot or cold, if you buy salad potatoes just open the bag and throw in the tray.

I’d go with the slow cooker idea - no stress if they are late! Two would be good. Make a chilli type mixture in one and a veggie version in the other. Cook rice to go with it - microwave packets are fine - easy but expensive and quick. Add some dips as mentioned by a previous poster. It’s easier to eat from pasta bowls if not sitting at the table.
Cook a few sausages to add to the meal that the children can eat if they turn their noses up at your delicious chillis.
Your past experience with this group should sway you towards offering a nice meal that is as stress free and relaxed for you as is possible!

How about pie? Could do a cheese and onion and a meat option. Buy them ready made. With red cabbage or mushy peas or something similar folk can help themselves to.

I’d do 2 curries with rice salad and naan bread. You can make the curries in advance. The bbcgoodfood Dahl with sweet potato and spinach is really simple too. Then a meat one.

Thank you lots of really good ideas here. Liking the sound of either the veggie bean chilli with veggie sausages in the slow cooker (for all) or two curries or the pies option (I can make a Jamies meat pie filling ahead of time and top with ready made pastry) and am sure I can also cobble together a cheese one. I over complicate things trying to keep everyone happy.

He is a really good cook and they often eat out at very expensive restaurants. I don’t want to compete but want to serve something nice easy and edible for all. So no one is still hungry.

I made fish tacos last time I fed a fussy crowd and they were a big hit. You could cheat and use Old El Paso, fish fingers like this recipe or goujons.

Pie option is thinking great.you could make the base for both the day before and keep in Tupperware in your fridge.then bung the pastry lid(or top and bottom) fresh. Then lots of steaming veg in dishes on the side means no one is hungry and is a comforting meal for all.

Some ideas
Macaroni cheese
Garlic breads
Veg samosas
Quiches
Mini sausage rolls - meat and cheesy ones

I wouldn't do crudités and dips because people do double dip.
And it's so unhygienic.

id make a really nice cottage pie and a chickpea and sweet potato curry to serve with rice

if they eat on the way again then you'll have left overs

the cottage pie can be made the day before and eaten with a fork and the curry in the slow cooker and also eaten with a fork so no need to sit at a table

I'd arrange to meet them at a convenient restaurant near you.
Then if they don't turn up or are "late" you can at least eat.

Their past behaviour would totally put me off faffing around for them as they sound very rude.