Eating less and with less variety

[Esme]

I have an 11 month boy who refuses to eat. Mealtimes are a nightmare with food all over the floor as the only way I can get him to eat is by giving him a spoon which he dips in his bowl and I can then quickly get mouthfuls in him. However he won't eat breakfast full stop and often only has one good meal a day sometimes not even that. He is no longer gaining enough weight and only wants milk. I'm still breast feeding and desperate to give up but I can't get him to take a cup or bottle. I worry that Tom doen't get enough nutrition. I've given up making meals for him because it's soul destoying when it all goes in the bin and I'm just left with a load of mess so now I've resorted to just opening another jar and feel guilty. Has anyone got any advice?

Esme, my daughter, nearly 9 months old, has been a poor eater for a few months now and I too was cooking for her and almost in tears as she point blank refused anything I made. I found that she loved fruit and yogurt but not much else. Breakfast is therefore something like Organix Oat Apple and Pear which I add frozen stewed apples and pears to. I have found one jar food that she likes so, although not much variety, I usually give her this but regularly try some others incase she has come round! I have found a couple of things that she does eat that's not in a jar and that's any fruit, stewed and pureed, yogurts and fromage frais, baked beans, heated and pureed and, I'm almost emabarrassed to say, I have discovered this week that she LOVES smoked salmon! She will wolf it down which, when you're used to a really picky eater, is an absolute delight! Also, will eat lots of bread. I'm also breastfeeding and was worried about nutrition and my health visitor suggested I buy vitamin drops from their reception (less than £1) and give her these which I do when I remember. Mine is also underweight - less than 9th centile - and I am now not going to worry about it. She's mostly a happy baby and those charts are based on bottle-fed babies which are usually heavier than breastfed anyway. I think you know when your child is healthy and the whole weight thing becomes obsessional so maybe just check it once in a while??
I can really sympathise and hope it does get easier.

My 11 month old son has recently stopped accepting food from a spoon. Initially this was OK as he would eat a variety of finger foods - however, over the past week or so he has been eating next to nothing, and does not seem willing to even try things that until recently were firm favourites. I've tried all manner of tactics (giving him his own spoon, feeding him in different chairs/rooms, leaving bowls of finger foods within reach at all times etc etc) and I'm now at my wits end.He just does not seem remotely interested in food of any description.
I guess what I'm looking for is some reassurance - how long does this sort of thing usually go on for, and at what stage do I need to take him to the doctor (if at all).
Both myself and dh are completely stressed out about this and are starting to feel like complete failures as parents. Help!

Hey Sweetie- I think this is quite common around this age and unfortunately, can last for a while. The basic rule for food refusers is: If they're putting on weight, don't worry (or at least don't let them see you're worried!) Easier said than done, I know. I've had to walk out of the room before now in order not to weep with frustration at my kids' blithe refusal of anything remotely healthy to eat.
I think it's a combination of genuine knowledge of when they're hungry (a skill I lost years ago!) and seeing if they can get a good worried / annoyed reaction from me. It's possible that your baby has the same sort of mixture- their appetite starts waning a bit at around a year old as growth slows and he'll be starting to realise that his actions provoke reactions from you and his dad and wanting to test these out in a scientific manner!
Don't feel rubbish about yourselves as parents- I don't think I know anyone with kids who hasn't had a few "issues" with feeding and/or food.

Reading this thread has made me feel alot better. My dd is almost 10 months old and has become a very fussy eater. I couldn't even tell you what she likes / dislikes because it varies from day to day. Mealtimes have become a real battle and I often get very frustrated. Knowing that this is a phase that most kids go through has cheered me up. I will stop worrying and relax - if she's hungry she'll let me know and I'll have to give her whatever is available.

Can I just second those who have said that this refusing to eat is a phase - my dd ate everything until she was one, and then, literally overnight, she just stopped and became incredibly fussy. She would not eat anything, and I went through a couple of weeks cooking 2 or 3 meals per session! Eventually, I was given the advice that has already been given here - they'll never let themselves starve, and don't let it become an issue (how easy that is to say, how hard it is to do!). My dd is now almost 5, and I've suddenly realised that she is no longer fussy at all - she will eat most things without a problem. She has school dinners, and comes home telling me she's had mash (WOW), carrots (NO!) and many other things she used to refuse point blank! My other dd has never been fussy, but she takes hours to eat her food - she can't sit still and concentrate for long enough. But's that's another thread!

Been there, done that. The one thing that really, really got me stressed was meal times. I'm with ScummyMummy - once they get to round about a year old their appetites start to wane (if it didn't they would end up looking like the Teletubbies) and they get very clued up as to how to wind Mummy and Daddy up. Don't worry, your son will eat when he's hungry - but I shouldn't try to force him, it will only make him more stubborn. If he refuses to eat something, just casually remove the bowl with a smile, even though you may be cursing inside! It is just a phase - even though it may seem like it goes on forever!

I have just got to add here that I read a really funny book called something like 'Autobiography of a 1 year old' and in this teh author ( a 1 year old) says how much fun he has with his mealtimes! It is a funny book, but with so much truth in it!

I thought it was just me! Dd has just turned one, previously ate anything, is a chunky wee thing , but recently won't eat any mushy stuff at all and the only thing she will eat off a spoon is yogurt....
Ds aged two and a half keeps saying "WANT MEAT!!!" I think he is on the Atkins diet..

We have the same problem with ds (15 months). He refuses to eat anything off a spoon from either me or dh - unless it's sweet! However, he WILL let his childminder feed him with a spoon - and she can often feed him things he wouldn't take from us. I refuse to allow myself to get uptight about this - I just feed him finger-ish stuff in the evenings and weekends (or make sure there's a plastic table cloth beneath him when we give him rice or something like that) and take the view that as long as he's eating well 5 days a week, it doesn't really matter how he eats at weekends!

hi everyone,our daughter has all of a sudden refuse to eat anything. All she wants is milk, and therefore goes through about two pints of cows milk everyday. I'm worried she is not eating enough, but she seems perfectly fine, and really active so all can do is wait.

wren, we are having exactly the same experience with our son who is 30 months old. How old is your girl?