Mum's scared of letting me feed myself!

[Decmum]

I'm all for teaching self-sufficiency but DS is 9 months and so far -

1. Thinks trainer cups are toys so never achieves fluid release...too busy chewing the handle
2. Chokes on most first finger foods because he doesn't appear to know that chewing is more important than speed. Tried rice cakes, rich tea fingers..you name it.
3. Rips every toy with suckers off the table/bath within seconds..in fact he thinks that's the challenge rather than the toy SSSSSSOOOOOOO.....

• Does it matter that he's not drinking from a cup yet or is this a 'Ginaism' that I should ignore?
• Which finger foods can I try to avoid the hymlich manouver being required?
• How on earth can you allow self-feeding if the dish has no hope of staying on the deck for even a second? His girlfriends appear to be munching in to Pizzas and siping baby lattes!

do you have an anyway up cup?
they are too hard IMO

banana btw

phew relieved re not the only one.

tho ds has been drinking a little water from an open cup after 2 months effort (offering it every meal for 1 swallow, most of which went down his front). however, today tried to give him milk from it and he has been outraged ever since.

pasta any good? ds has had a couple of pieces of pasta from my plate along the way. but i'd forgotten the gluten thing so maybe not for better mothers.

somebody recommended boiled potato as it collapses in their mouths.

also i think ds thinks being grabbed out of the high chair, leaned forward on my arm and slapped on the back is part of a normal meal - paranoid re choking - that's just how it is.

hope some more experienced mums can advise.

Dd1 never got the hang of a cup for ages and ages and AGES. If that's any consolation.

My ds took ages to get onto finger foods too.

You could try grated cheese - but be warned, it gets everywhere!
Rusks are quite goods as they tend to soften up in their mouths
How about sticks of cooked veg - eg carrot?
Or very ripe pear?
The non-spill cups all seem to be very hard to get anything from (you try!) We usually ended up using a "normal" training cup (ie it spills if you tip it) or widening the hole in the non-spill kinds -which defeats the purpose.
If you persevere he'll get there eventually.
By the way, we didn't give ours dishes or plates to feed themselves until we could trust them not to tip it out. Just put finger food direct onto the (clean) high chair tray or onto the table.

About the cup - he's only 9 months so I wouldn't panic. I think the advice is for them to be off teats by 12 months isn't it? The anyway-up cups are hard but what I did was just let Ds2 have it with water in anyway to 'play' with (just had it in the room all the time) and eventually he worked out how to do it.

Finger foods are a tough one - I was never brilliant at this. DS2 managed wholemeal toast at 9 months because wholemeal bread seems to break up more while they are squashing it in their hands!! What about Farley's rusks as they get quite soggy while sucking/chewing them (but they make a right mess!!)?

Agree with Scotlou - just put the food on the tray of the highchair. I never bothered with the bowl when they were that little.

We practised drinking from a normal cup in the bath one day...went brilliantly and I thought 'excellent! We can practice here' but then I realised that he was gulping it down in an attempt to chew the cup...10 mins later the poor little man spewed up all over us both (actually mainly me) due to the air bubbles it had created and ended up right back in the bath.

Right back to the drawing board...

Agree with Coddy - go for the mushy stuff, banana, overripe pear, steamed veg like broccoli etc even purees can become finger foods and you can always give him a bread stick or lightly toasted fingers to dip in and suck the puree off ! I used to put chunks of bread in ds' savouries to soak it up and then he could either suck them or chew them. Good for spoon practice too.

Make sure the cup is free flowing or he'll just chomp on it in frustration - try either a standard 2 or 3 hole lidded cup or remove the sippy valve from the Avent types. You could also try a straw as an alternative.

dd was useless with stick on toys. In the end we didn't bother but you could try Clippsafe Toy Ties or strips of velcro to fasten a couple on to highchair if you want to distract him.

Finally don't bother with a plate, put anything straight on the tray or table, and have a portion for yourself - they love to "steal" their parents' food !

get a heinz soft spout and/or a tomme tippe feeder
drink from it your self and show her

I always just removed the non-drip rubbery bit from Avent sippy cups otherwise ds would nearly turn himself inside out sucking to no avail! But it still took him ages to get the hang of it - not until about 11 months was he really happy with it.

DS is just 9 mths. He will drink from the tommee tippee free flow, but also shakes it and chews the bottom and the water goes everywhere!!!!!! Fingers foods - bread sticks, cucumber slices, kiwi fruit slices, banana, long rusks, slices of pepper and soliders of wholemeal bread & toast.
As for toys with suckers - "Isn't the sucker bit to chew Mummy?????" I rest my case