Is he going to starve? Should I give him something to eat?

[NatalieJane]

DS1 (5yo) is such a fusy eater, we have really had enough of giving him the 5 or 6 things he will eat, so today we dished him up boiled potatoes and meatballs, he hasn't touched it, crying because he is hungry, are we right to dig our heels in? Should I give him just a little something? Hellllllllp!! Am I an evil mum?

I'm pretty much in the same boat. DD1 rarely eats much for breakfast, will have a really good-sized lunch, and then will just pick at her tea. Tonight's tea took nearly 2 hours to complete and all she ate was a couple bits of sausage and a few pieces of pasta and some strawberries.

We've fallen into an awful trap of saying 'Please eat your tea' 'Please eat your tea' 'Eat your tea' 'Eat your tea' ...I hear myself and I know that its the wrong thing to do

Tomorrow, I am going to set the timer for 30 minutes, fell horribly guilty, and hopefully get her into eating in the evenings [hopeful emoticon]

DD is 3 and lives off fresh air some days ... constantly insisting she is hungry between meals, but kicks up a fuss when required to tear herself away from Cbeebies and come to the table. I just don't speak at the dinner table. Not about food, anyway. I figure at least that way she only gets one parent going 'eat your tea, eat your tea' at her. She's getting better tho. I took her to Burger King the other day, and she took a bite out of her burger, and then another, and I thought 'good grief, it's like an actual normal person eating'. She was a third of a burger away from eating the lot - just my luck if the first meals she ever finished in her life EVER was junk food.

I was going to say 'depends on what your DH is like'. Then I mentioned it to my DH, and the first thing he said was 'discuss it offline'. Which is a very good point, whether it starts a row or not, at least don't let it be a row at the dinner table.

He then went on to say you need to state what you want to achieve, and set out how you will get there ... this approach may actually work if your husband is a civil servant, software engineer or project manager (or all three oh god what did I do to deserve this ).

Alternatively, you could not care. We have this at mealtimes, and I let it slide. DD knows full well that no one else, not me, not nursery staff, not my parents, will spoon-feed her. Only DH. She doesn't try it on with anyone else. She also pretty much knows that it's one of the few areas where she CAN try it on with DH, he's pretty firm about most things. So I reckon in the long run, it really doesn't matter.

I do roll my eyes a little bit when she's not looking though.

Lilyloo...ditto the Shepherds Pie, lol! Equally, casseroles, or anything that my mum used to shove carrots in to bulk them up a bit (I still can't eat cooked carrots! )

OP - I've just read all the posts and think the timer idea is simple but genius. We are going through a similar thing at the moment with my 1 year old!!! so whilst not quite in the same league I do sympathise xx

Hi - my first time on Mumsnet here. I'm going spare here. My two year old son's food repertoire has never been great but is rapidly reducing to pints of (weak) squash a day and marmite or honey toast. I breast fed for 18 months but he has never accepted cows milk - not even milkshakes. He won;t eat any fruit or vegetables voluntarily either. I have to hide it all. He also refuses to feed himself unless it is toast.

He used to eat yoghurts and cheese OK so I wasn't too worried about the lack of dairy but now he is starting to refuse that too. At the moment I have to spoon feed him anything half healthy in front of the TV otherwise he clamps his mouth shut. (My 4 year old son will eat anything and everything from kippers to artichokes - at the table - with a knife and fork. I don't know how I managed to get it so wrong with the little one when it went so well with the big one??)

My head is telling me to just give him what the rest of the family eats and if he doesn't eat it then he goes to bed hungry but my heart won't let me carry it through!

Advice/encouragement desperately required.