At my wits end - 3yo won't eat proper meals

[Tillyboo]

My dd who is almost 3 is a total nightmare when it comes to eating a proper evening meal.
Breakfast - is fine, she'll eat 1-2 bowls of weetabix, cheerios etc. or toast and fruit, yoghurt
Lunchtime - is ok'ish, she loves pasta with a tomato, cheese or bolognese sauce (meat has to be completely smooth), sometimes a cheese or ham sandwich, cucumber, tomatoes (sometimes), cheese cubes, mini sausages
Evening Meal - NIGHTMARE if I try and give her meat & veg she'll put a forkful in her mouth and just spit it out. I've tried loads of different recipes from Annabel Karmel and Tana Ramsey etc. All homemade stuff ...
Homemade chicken burgers, beef burgers, shepherds pie, roasts, sausages, roast, boiled, mashed potato, green beans, peas, cauliflower, cabbage, courgettes, sweetcorn etc. Won't eat rice either, All a NO NO
She will eat, eggs, broccoli & baby sweetcorn (sometimes), pasta, home-made fish fingers (but NOT fish in sauce or in it's naural state) cheese, apples, bananas, pears, grapes, strawbs, yoghurts, chocolate, ice-cream
She's a well made little girl, tall for her age and is bright and well so what she is eating is obviously doing her good but I worry about her non-meat eating. I don't think she'd eat Tofu or Soya or any other meat replacement.
It makes evening meal times very stressful for me as a) I spend ages preparing her meal only to scrape it into the bin and b) I feel she's not getting a full and varied diet and c) It makes life very difficult trying to think of meals, I can't give her pasta every night.
If anyone can offer any advice, suggestions or just to say 'Me too', I'd feel much better.
My dd would be happy living on cheese and chocolate if I let her.

i think a lot of children struggle with meat. I worked as a nanny for quite a few years and saw a few kids who just didn't like the texture of it.
I don't think it's a problem as long as the rest of her diet is good, and it sounds like she's doing ok. she eats a lot more than many children her age

have you tried getting her to help prepare the food? and keep it simple. also, try and encourage her to taste things even if she then says she doesn't like it. It can take children a while to get used to tastes and textures.

She's still 2 - that's very young for meat eating, I'm sure I've read somewhere (annabel karmel maybe?dunno) that lots of kifs this age aren't able to enjoy the texture of chewy meat. I personally wouldn't have the expectation that she would have meat more than two or three times a week? It doesn't have to be an issue really....

Couple of other things I did with ds at this age; Give the big main meal of the day at lunchtime, then a simple sandwich/soupl style meal at dinner time; pressure off you at that time of day, and you know she has had her big meal so there's no worries.

Or if you're determined to pursue a cooked dinner, bring it forward so that she's not tired, and give a light lunch, and no afternoon snack other than literally an apple or something.....

any of that sound helpful?

Hmm, I take your point about young children not liking the texture of meat so I'm not going to stress about it anymore.
I've tried giving her a more substantial meal at lunchtime but that hasn't worked - she has a proper lunch twice a week at nursery and she won't eat it there either.
Tonight she hoovered up beans on toast with some toast and marmite and chunks of cheese.
My Polish friend brought round some german sausage this afternoon and my dd did eat a little bit of it which really surprised me ! Maybe I ought to try her with some really unusual foods - I might strike it lucky ????

We don't eat meat. Apart from fish fingers my dds like cauliflower cheese, macaroni cheese, and bolognese-type sauces made with beans - you can buy ready-cooked mixed beans in tins - or red lentils. Interestingly neither of them will touch any kind of veggie burger, bean burger or bake - even if we spend hours making them together.

Don't stress. She sounds to have a great diet before your evening meal TBH

She will get there and in the meantime, pasta is fine. It may seem limiting but there is nutrional value in pasta and sauce.

My tip would be to make up batches of what she likes and freeze it into dd portions. It takes the stress out of having to make 'dd friendly' meals all the time and cuts your stress levels.

I would say don't let her know it upsets you or she will see that she can use food as a weapon. It's hard but just go with it.

So long as you know she's getting 2 decent meals per day I hardly think she'll fall to bits without a perfect dinner.

I wish my 4 yr old would eat half the things your dd does She sounds as though she is doing great to me. Lots of children don't like the texture of meat, DS3 (aged 2) eats well, but I do have to cut up chicken etc finely and have to blend mince as he doesn't like the texture. DS2 eats not a lot!!

Thanks all ! I feel much better now