Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Food/recipes

For related content, visit our food content hub.

Plate-up or help yourself; what's correct?

20 replies

siblingrevelry · 31/10/2013 16:27

Just whether there's a consensus on what's the 'right' way or if it's an 'each to their own' thing.

My mom always gave us our dinner plated up, whereas my DH's family put it all out on the table in dishes so you can help yourself.

What do you do and why?

OP posts:
siblingrevelry · 31/10/2013 16:28

Sorry for error-Just wondered whether there was consensus...

OP posts:
ilovepowerhoop · 31/10/2013 16:30

day to day dinners get served on plates. Sunday roast/ Christmas dinner is in dishes to help yourselves

RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie · 31/10/2013 16:30

Not sure if there's a 'right' or 'wrong' way tbh. I prefer helping myself but for a normal family meal, I usually shove it all on plates - saves on washing up!

CMOTDibbler · 31/10/2013 16:30

My mum always dished up on normal meals - she didn't believe in creating extra washing up for serving dishes

DreamlessSleep · 31/10/2013 16:31

Plate up. Otherwise ds wouldn't leave any sausages or chicken nuggets for anyone else and tge children wouldnt have any veg.

TheFallenMadonna · 31/10/2013 16:33

My PIL put it in dishes on the table, then FIL dishes up the meat, and MIL dishes up the veg.

Eastwickwitch · 31/10/2013 16:36

I've always regarded the 'help yourself from serving dishes approach' as being correct.
But if you go to a fancy pants restaurant it's normally plated up so now I'm not sure.

WilsonFrickett · 31/10/2013 21:48

Plate up, but I think that's one of those habits that's left-over from DS being very small and not wanting hot dishes on the table/or from when it was just me and DH and there wasn't anybody to dish up to so we just plonked it on the plate.

Snowlike · 31/10/2013 22:10

I do both or either - depends on the food, the company, my mood....as long as people get fed and don't take more than their fair share - (this is important and taught!) there's no issue. Lots of food is better suited to helping yourself, there's an etiquette that must be learnt...14 year old nephew eating all the smoked salmon without enquiring whether anyone else would like some - while his parents proudly looked on because he was eating something other than chicken nuggets - I'm glaring at you!!

2kidsintow · 31/10/2013 22:19

If it's a standard dinner, it's dished up in the kitchen. Less washing up.

If it's a sunday roast then it's dishes on the table and help yourself.
If it's a salad then it's chopped and left in piles on a plate in the kitchen and people come and help themselves to the bits they like.
If it's fajitas it's help yourself from the pan and the chopping board of salad in the kitchen.

ceeveebee · 31/10/2013 22:23

I use serving dishes if we have guests.
If its just us then I dish up, not worth creating washing up just for us!

peacefuleasyfeeling · 31/10/2013 23:13

I nearly started a thread about this the other day, but restrained myself. This is a big bone of contention for me, probably getting disproportionately so as the years have gone on. I come from a family(and, come to think of it, a country) where it was serving dishes all the way, for every meal, no exception. Makes perfect sense to me, people eat what they want, sure, my parents would prompt us when we'd try to dodge the greens or whatever, but essentially, we all served ourselves. It looks attractive and encourages modest portion sizes, as you know that if you really want to, you can just help yourself to a little more of whatever you fancy right there at the table. No need to labour over an over-stacked plate, and hopefully less waste. DP, on the other hand, is a keen plater-upper. He doesn't like the extra dishes on the table or in the sink afterwards, but enjoys seeing plates neatly plated up. He does at least half, if not more, of the cooking, so in this respect I think it's fair that he gets to present his meals as he pleases. But I wish I could impress upon him how much better it would be if we could go serving dishes all the way. He is far too generous with portion sizes, probably thinking he's saving someone a trip to the cooker for seconds. I'm sure I end up eating more than I would have, had I been able to serve myself, as I really dislike food being left discarded on the plate at the end of a meal. Actually, I know I end up eating more than I would otherwise as he insists on making my serving almost as big as his; "Aw, but Peaceful, it would be unfair if I got more than you..." (aargh, but you're a big , active bloke, DP, with an enviable metabolism!) Hence the gradual emergence of a totally avoidable middle-age spread... It drives me potty! But my objections fall on deaf ears, he is adamant plating up is how he likes to do it. Short of standing right next to him and spelling out exactly how much of everything I want, I can't see a way around it. Sorry about rant, just had to scratch that itch...

mousmous · 31/10/2013 23:19

I dish up a small portion of everything for the dc, after that they can help themselves from the pans on the table.

mawbroon · 31/10/2013 23:20

I put the food out on the table for everyone to get their own.

No extra washing up because I put the pans on the table.

I am not responsible for the portion sizes of the other adults, up to them if they want to overeat!

DorisHerod · 31/10/2013 23:41

Nice dinner=serving dishes. Kids' quick tea on a school night before cubs/swimming=plated up. For speed of serving and clearing.

Nice dinner is about 4 out of 7 meals. Quick tea is about 3 evenings a week.

casacastille · 31/10/2013 23:42

I rarely plate up. It's good for everyone, but especially children, to be used to eating according to their own appetite not someone else's idea of what it should be, and to learn about sharing the food provided, particularly when limited.

No extra work - pans on table unless we have guestsSmile

DumSpiroSpero · 31/10/2013 23:46

DH is a chef - if we have friends for dinner and he cooks he puts meat on the plates and everything else in dishes on the table.

If I cook I plate everything up as I like faffing about with the presentation.

DH is of the Tom Kerridge school of cooking - I am more of a Heston Blumenthal Grin!

siblingrevelry · 01/11/2013 09:23

Interesting about the over-eating side of things. I often find the opposite to be true-when at MIL's we are sitting facing all the lovely leftovers and can't help but pick at them and have 2nd's, whereas I'm less likely to get another plateful from the pans in the kitchen.

I have a very small kitchen, so Xmas lunch for 8 this year will have to be plated at the table, otherwise I'll have dinners balancing on the draining board and window sill!

OP posts:
mawbroon · 01/11/2013 11:15

But siblingrevelry, the choice to overeat in these situations has been made by you.

Years ago, DH was complaining that he was getting fat because I put too much on his plate. That's when I started putting the dishes on the table so it was entirely up to him how much he chose to eat. I was not prepared to take the blame for him gaining weight, no way!

Taffeta · 01/11/2013 16:27

I didn't see "plating up" outside a restaurant until I met DH. I don't like it, at all.

MIL does it when we go there for lunch, which is about 4 times per year. She does a big roast with around 5 accompaniments. She even puts the gravy on everyone's plate.

I have problems with this on so many levels! How does she know how much of something I want to eat? How does she know how hungry I am? If I only want one potato as my jeans are feeling a bit tight? And ditto therefore want extra carrots etc etc etc.

No.no.no. Food in bowls on table, meat on a big platter, gravy in a jug. A china jug, as well please. Not a plastic measuring jug for anyone that wants more. Ewww.

I realise I sound ridiculous and am leaving now.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread