Feeding herself with a spoon, WHEN?????

[oliveoil]

dd is nearly 15 months and does not like using a spoon to feed herself. Eats really well, not fussy at all but only if I spoon feed her or if its finger food (her fave).

If I give her a spoon, she usually bangs it in the dish or throws the spoon on the floor giggling. I have tried us both having spoons, with me shoveling food in but still no luck.

Am I rushing things to expect her to feed herself at this age?

dd is 16.5 months and in the past couple of weeks has started feeding herself with a spoon. Mainly easy stuff like yoghurt actually makes it in to her mouth and harder stuff she still puts in with her fingers.

My ds is the same age and also likes to bang the spoon rather than feed himself. From what I remember his sister was about 18 mths+ before she used a spoon properly. As I remember my friend's son, who is the same age as dd, was being really good with a spoon and I thought I had better get dd to use one as she was strictly a finger feeder. My 2 just prefer mucky fingers I think

I am sure I read in a book (Gina!) that children can feed themselves from 9 months. Or was that using a cup? Either way dd does neither properly.

Oliveoil my ds is 20 months and he has only just started using a spoon for everything. It's got to the point now where he gets so frustrated if he can't get it on the spoon or if it falls off. He will not use fingers at all now! Give it a couple of months and she'll be well away. Just make sure you keep giving her a spoon and she'll soon have it sussed.

Thanks

I get myself all worried that she is 'slow' at things as she has only just started crawling and seems behind all the children at mums & toddler group. Maybe she is just a lazy sausage.

I'm sure she is focusing her attention on other skills. I wouldn't worry.

dd started at around 14 months. However I'm sure ds was later. She had the advantage of having ds to copy. In fact the first time she did it was at breakfast when I was busy with him so she just took up her spoon and started her weetabix. After that there was no way anyone could feed her.

My ds is 2.4 and still can't do it properly.

ds could feed himself with a fork by about 10m but couldn't cope with a spoon. However, he didn't want to feed himself and generally insisted on being fed for another 4-5m! dd, 13m, on the other hand, is desperate to feed herself but can't cope with any cutlery, and can barely manage with her fingers. But they both like/d 'practicing'. Do you retrieve the spoon every time she chucks it? Maybe she thinks it's a great game, rather than wants to imitate you.

prettycandles - I say 'no' and try to look stern then give her the spoon back. My 'stern' look usually blends into kissing her on the forehead however, am crap.

Well there you have it - you're too nice!

My 15 month old is useless with a spoon too, though unlike yours she's also a bit crap with eating in general! She likes a spoon to gnaw on and of course to flick substances into my hair from but doesn't yet know how to get substances into her mouth from it. Her friend, same age, is much better at it than she is. Then on the other hand my daughter's a chatterbox and her mate is more of a grunter. Sorry, this is a bit of an irrelevant ramble. Basically if everything's ok and she's eating well and happy and all that, don't worry. She'll be using a spoon one day soon!

I wouldn't worry too much about it if she's happy for you to feed her. My dd is now 21 months and has only been feeding herself properly for the last few months. I do remember feeling a bit guilty when I realised other kids were feeding themselves much better than her at maybe the 15 month mark, but then they were also covering themselves and the floor with food in the process, so I was grateful to have less mess. Often once they start feeding themselves they won't let you do it for them anymore so you have to put up with the mess and mealtimes taking forever. Much easier to wait until later IMO, but then that's probably me being lazy too! Now that my dd is older she makes hardly any mess feeding herself.

I've just finished spoon feeding supper to my four year old school boy! He can use a knife fork and spoon, but his dexterity with these culninary instruments depends on what he's meant to be eating. When younger I found the best way to practice his spoon feeding was to ensure the food was a favourite.

Today for instance, spoon/ice cream = no probs, spoon/casseroled lamb shanks = major reluctance. Me spoon feeding ds encourages him to try unfamiliar tastes. He's just coming out of a slightly fussy-with-food toddler stage and I want him to expand his menu likes.

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my ds is 17 months and loves spoons (and forks and knives if he can get away with it!!!) but just pushes food off his plate with it!
he tries his best with yoghurt though and just dips the spoon in and eats the tiny bits that go on the spoon.

I'm sure DD was self-feeding with a spoon by 12 months. But both she & her older brother PREFER me to feed me; they're perfectly competent self-feeders, just prefer the attention from Mum!

note to self: let ds try to feed himself more regularly
it is bad but time factors on a morning espcially make this hard

Do you know, I love the way this site makes you feel better. When you start getting paranoid and badmotherish, you can start a thread and get reasured that everyone is a crap as you (joke).

Not sure of everyone else but sometimes I find toddler groups etc a bit competitive 'ooooh he slept through from 6 hours old, he carves the sunday roast' etc.

DD has always been really independent with feeding and was using a spoon quite early, and then a little fork. At 21 months she now feeds herself exclusively both at home and at nursery. The only time she lets you help if she is feeling a bit off colour.

Apparantly DH never wanted to feed himself as a toddler and his mum had to feed him all the time. He didn't like getting his hands messy, bless him. BTW, I don't feed him now

Ds who has always tried to do as little in the way of reaching milestones (such as eating alone) as he can get away with has only recently started feeding himself (at 20 months) but he makes no mess and is left handed when doing it.

Not much help if you planned on having them compitent at doing it early (like dd who started at 10 months) but still he is cleaner than any of his frinds who are the same age, so perhaps worh the wait.

help! i'm new. does ds mean daughter? if it does my ds is exactly the same. spoon=toy at 15 mnths. i dont worry (not any more). maybe buying that book "finger food for toddlers" was a bad idea cos thats all i make for her now! sometimes if im feeling patient ill try her with a spoon, three actually- one for her, one for me to actually get food in her mouth and a spare one. the spoons go round in circles as she flings them on the floor and i give her the spare etc etc

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oh right! its true pregnancy melts your brain cos thats so obvious i should have worked it out. i take it dh is darling husband! thanks stressyhead