"I believe in the occasional snacky lunch.." Roll <<your eyes>> up for a gloriously poncetastic blog...

[snigger]

Snacky lunch? SNACKY LUNCH???

"For this one I packed soppressata, Castelvetrano olives, Red Leicester cheese, ricotta salata, and purple carrots. To go with, whole wheat bread, a British cheese cracker, and roasted pumpkin seeds" waffles Amanda, blithely unaware of even the hint of the existence of Dairylea in the self same universe as hers.

Caveat - the food is fab. Really good. Healthy, delicious, well-sourced, eye-wateringly expensive and beautifully photographed. In my dreams, Walker and Addie are standing at the foot of the kitchen island like a Shining throwback as Mummy's art director snaps their lunch and makes them late for Conversational Mandarin again.

It's lunch for 6 year old twins. Hide the Babybels and the grudging pb&j you threw together last Wednesday because this weeks new best friend has Nutella every day and allowances must be made (although at one point even Amanda grudgingly allows a morsel of 'commercial candy' on the grounds that someone had foisted it on her darlings at a party through the medium of a pinata)

Even goop isn't this pretentious - it feels like my tornado hell for epicures - I await the vomiting of clementines delightedly.....

Bless. Those pics are cute. Can you imagine the chaos of the photo shoot though.

'Right. Got the bow in her hair. Be quick'

'Fuck, she moved. Nooooooooo, Clara. Don't take the bow out. Amanda, she's taking the bow out again'

'No, no Clara. We don't take the bow out of our hair when Rueben is taking cute photos, leave it in. Now take the spoon. No. Don't mush the yogurt into your hair. The spoon. That's it. NO, NOT TO HIT YOUR BROTHER'

'Amanda. She took the bow out again'.

'FUCK. Anyone got any superglue?'

i'm going to start a blog

'Margots' DDs lunch'

day 1 - deconstructed quiche and some strips of advocado

day 2 - cheese sarnies and grapes

day 3 - cheese sarnies and grapes

day 4 - cheese sarnies and grapes

Thank you for bringing this into my life...

I have visions of the kids being Black Eyed Children....

lmao Dame and Mme

I think if you took them to McDonalds they'd turn their noses up at the salads.

I want to air mail those kids some fruit shoots. I bet they would cause them to go apeshit and run amok in there posh manhatten prep school.

ginhag, I think you have typed the most perfect pair of sentences I've ever seen on MN in that last post.

"I have snot in my hair. And it's not mine."

My ribs hurt.

Are her children not starving? Or have I misunderstood the scale?

What a load of pretentious twaddle. Even if the children eat this (which frankly, I doubt), it would never be enough. My boys (both skinny and with quite small appetites) would have needed twice that quantity at that age.

....
Looks like the leftovers my dad gives to the foxes.

...

(says Amanda, "chicken and tarragon are besties").

scratches eyes out

'carrots cooked forever'

Or, to give the dish its' proper name, mashed carrots.

Meanwhile in Soho Amanda's husband is eating McDonalds of a hookers boobs.

Those kids eat A LOT of processed meat.

My DC would throw that little lot on her spotless kitchen floor. And then smear it in a bit.

That doesn't sound like anything near enough calories for a six year old. Or enough fat. Or enough carbs.

Did she not take the seeds out of the peppers before she made the pepper and squash stew???

Salt in those mashed carrots, while we're slagging constructively critiquing things

Losing the will to live after looking at that blog.

Is she for real?

Please tell me I'm not the only one who stuffs the same lunches into their lunch packs every day whilst grumpily calculating how long it will be until they can do it themselves.

To be fair, my two don't have the deportment necessary to carry that kind of food any distance without producing something abstract-looking in their lunchbox.

I console myself with the knowledge that thinly sliced tomatoes cease to look like fishscales when they've gone through juvenile replication of a long spin cycle.

snigger. I'm all

My dad used to give us peanut butter and lettuce sandwiches. 'Just for a change'

My mum once sent me on a school trip with beefburger and tomato toasted sandwiches. Not so good cold, tho.

Why does she photograph the lunches in a bunker?

Because they have to live in a bunker lest the strength of their sautéed broccoli farts wipes out Greenwich village.