DD doesn't eat much at all

[Viewofthehills]

DD2 age 6 barely seems to eat.

I might as well send the toy food in her lunchbox-she doesn't touch it. Even if I leave out any treats and only put a wrap (her supposed favourite) in and water to drink she still doesn't touch it.

I haven't said anything at school because dinner ladies are horrible according to my older kids.

I don't make a fuss at home, I just keep on making these lunches and throwing them away.

Tips anyone?

Have you asked her why she doesn't eat what you give her? Does she eat at home at mealtimes? Snack between meals?

What does she eat at home?

I ask this because my DS (7) doesn't eat at school. His snack for playtime comes home uneaten whatever it is and so does his lunch if I make it, but have been told by the Dinner Ladies and Teachers that he doesn't eat school lunches either.

I make sure he has a big breakfast. Porridge, toast and fruit, then have a cheese and ham baguette, yoghurt and fruit ready for him as soon as he gets in at 3.30 then he has tea at 6pm, and again he has toast and fruit for supper at 8pm before bed.

He seems to thrive on this, has loads of energy and is growing well. So please don't worry children will not starve themselves and will eat when they are hungry.

Talk to school as well as your child. Give the lunchtime supervisors the benefit of the doubt that they are not 'horrible' and ask them to make sure she eats something. Tell your child this is what's going to happen. It could be that she's got into a bad habit - a lot would rather go out to play rather than eat at lunchtime. Could be something more sinister going on like bullies not letting her sit down and eat. Find out but don't dismiss lunchtime supervisors on the strength of hearsay.

Thanks for your replies.

I get that I shouldn't be prejudiced against the lunch staff, and I'm sure most lunch staff are lovely, but they are the same ones as when my elder daughter was there. She is 14 now and remembers them with a shudder because they would unfairly single a child out and pick on them. They are also happy to punish any child on the basis of another telling tales by making them stand in exclusion.
I'm concerned that if I high-light this they will use it against her. I think she sits there for most of lunchtime without eating anyway & I have wondered if it is tension that stops her eating at school If she ate a good breakfast and dinner I wouldn't worry, but she only picks.
She chooses what goes in her sandwich, they are not allowed a snack at break time, but I think she drinks her milk.I allow one biscuit and a drink- water or milk mainly when she comes in from school and we eat at 6. I mostly make fresh home-made meals from scratch.
If I could feed her at 4 when she gets in I think she would eat better, but it doesn't fit in very well with 3 kids and after school activities. She also loves anything junky, like pizza or battered chicken, but we don't have that very often.
Sometimes I think it's just attention seeking. I tried school lunches when she was in reception; she got herself so upset that she was sent home as sick. She then polished off a plate of toast.

I will ask her again why? but I have never been very enlightened by the answers before!

If a school is genuinely employing sadistic bullies as lunchtime supervisors, complain to the school. Bottom line is that your child is spending the hours of 9am to 3pm every day starved of energy and nutrition. It won't be helping her general health, her stamina or her ability to concentrate on lessons. If she needs help in getting more to eat during the day then rope in her teacher, work on a plan between the teacher, you and DD of how you're going to fix it..... allowing a snack, Tazering the dinner-ladies, whatever.... and then work it through methodically. You can't be at the school and your DD isn't going to change by herself.

Thanks Cogito: I'll do as you suggest, 1st talk to the school. Consider tazering the dinnerladies as a last resort :o