HELP WEANING ONTO SOLIDS AND OFF BREAST!!!

[MammyShirl]

Please please can anyone advise, I am going through a nightmare right now with my 6 month old daughter. I had originally planned to breastfeed her for 5 months then wean her off and onto formula milk for when I returned to work. I waited too long to introduce her to the bottle and she just refuses it. I could not return to work at 5 months and took another two weeks off. I start tring to make her feed from a beaker which kind of worked. I only have to work 2 days a week. I went to work for two weeks therefore my mother looked after her 4 times. All 4 times she drank about 2 ozs of formula milk and cried the whole day until I came home at 7pm. My poor mother spent all the days pacing round, taking her out for walks and driving about to send her asleep. One of the days she actually had to drive into central london for me to feed her as my baby got herself in such a state my mother was worried. My mother found it too hard so I have had to take a month off work (unpaid leave) to sort the problem out. I know its just too much for my baby at once as I am trying to wean her off my breast onto a beaker, change from breast milk to formula (she has to have soya as she had allergic reaction to normal formula)and get her on solids. I introduced solids two weeks ago, she hardly has any but I guess she will get the knack of it soon. I have to return to work in three weeks, I am so stressed about it all and cantever see her drinking milk from a beaker. I feel like she will be breast feeding off me when she is 15!!!!!!!! Has anyone gone through this? I would really appreciate any advice!

Poor you, you sound stressed out. Will your daughter take expressed breast milk from a beaker? It would be a hassle for you, but it cuts down on the number of changes for your daughter to make and you could still breast feed the days you weren't at work. If your daughter is allergic this is an important thing you can do for her. I wouldn't stress about the solids - milk (formula or breast) is the most important food for her right now. I can't leave my ds (7 months)with anyone for more than an hour in case he gets hungry so I know what you are going through. HTH

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Had a very similar problem, it's a nightmare. I did eventually manage to get my dd to take a bottle, have tried different teats? I found the latex orthodontic ones worked immediately. It may be worth a try.

I'd say try expressed breast milk in a bottle.... I WOULD persevere with the bottle... especially when she is hungry.
The following trick I have seen use with great success... Get your DH to give her a bottle of breast milk first thing in the morning and make sure she does NOT see you (like if you had not spent the night at home)... she should be hungry, will put up a fight for a little while but she shoud drink.... and do this repeatedly !
Good luck

Posted a long reply and my internet connection failed! In essence, agree with Pupuce, try breast milk as I've heard soya tastes nasty (and isn't as good). Solids will help as sloppy food will provide fluid as will a morning and evening breastfeed so you will feel happier that your dd won't be suffering. Please don't panic, she will take a bottle eventually, especially if it contains lovely breastmilk! She's really very young. Don't stress about the future. My ds was mixed/breastfed for over a year and was very happy to be weaned.

Thank you so much for all your advise! I guess I should start with getting her use to drinking from a beaker and use expressed breast milk first. Aloha - I am going to try what you suggested, my partner has agreed to try feed her first thing in the morning with expressed breast milk. If only she took the bottle or beaker then my life would be so much easier. She seems to enjoy the breast more than ever, the last week she has begun to make really loud noises when feeding, sound like she is saying "yummm yummm" - musy be part of her plan to stay on mummys boobs! I wish i didnt have to go back to work yet!

Mammy: Gina Ford's Contented LIttle Baby Book has great advice on weaning. She also has a book just on weaning. Her system worked great for our ds. Best of luck. Be strong: the baby WILL NOT STARVE ITSELF! WHen she's hungry enough, she will eat! hang in there!!

How's it going Mammy Shirl?
Given what you've decided to do - maybe you should post on breast and bottle feeding about working and expressing. I'm sure lots of mumsnetters have good tips.

I HATE COMPUTERS!!!!!!!Twice typed a really long reply, corrected my grammer, spelling etc. Then the stupid computer crashed!!!!!!!!
My little girl has a cold so has gone off soilds all together, I though i would take the pressure off her until she recovers. Aloha - it tried getting my partner to feed her in the morning, no luck i'm afraid but I guess i need to try every day with the same method. The more I think about it i feel let down by the midwifes and health visitors, they should of warned me about the importance of introducing the bottle before 6 weeks. I read 4 baby books whilst pregnant and none warned me either. Moan moan moan... I will keep you all informed. Any other suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

Mammyshirl - I personally would introduce juice from a beaker ( my children do not have dental cavities) as she is more likely to take it. Some babies will reject breastmilk except from the breast. Breastfeed her before you go to work and when you get home. If you up her solids and get her to drink juice/water from a beaker, she will get enough nourishment. I started solids with my last baby at 6 months and within 2 weeks she was on 3 meals a day. You can continue to breastfeed her even if you work shifts. Are you working full-time when you return?

By the way I didn't introduce a bottle till I went back to work at 14 weeks. A ababy will feed from a bottle if they are hungry enough. Walking around whilst bottle feeding is a good way to encourage them to take it.

RobinW, piriton shouldnt be used under 1year of age except on docs advice really.

Mammyshirl - I am a postnatal doula -and I can assure that some babies who are not even 6 weeks old refuse the bottle (I end up cup feeding them!)... there is NO guarantee that introducing a bottle early will make the baby take it - sorry!

Well, mammyshirl, your girl really loves her mummy, doesn't she! I do think you have to persevere. My friend had a similar trauma, but it was all OK in the end. Good luck, and don't stress too much. Feed her morning and night as Mears said, give her enough food and she won't starve.

Mammyshirl,
I can sympathise with you 100%. My dd would not take the bottle either (at 6 months) and I had to take 2 months unpaid leave (very happy to have an excuse to stay at home) to eventually get her to take it. All I can say is persevere. I went through copious amounts of formula milk but in the end she did eventually take the bottle. I think the turning point came when we both got an awful virus/gastro and I was too ill to actually produce enough milk for her and because all she'd take was milk, she just got fed up with my ‘empty handbags’ and took the bottle (I was beside myself thinking she wasn't getting enough fluid!). Perhaps what you should try is expressing most of your milk (try just from one breast first in case she gets hysterical you’ve always got the other one for backup) into a bottle and then letting her ‘empty’ that breast and when she’s fed up with not getting any milk from that breast, offer her the bottle with the expressed milk and see what happens. I would also say stick to the bottle, it's a bit more like Mum and the soft teat with slightly warm milk is more of a comfort than a hard beaker. Good luck and let us know what happens.

Sorry about all the wierd " things going on - don't know why my computer does that!!

I had a similar problem with my little boy. As soon as he got his teeth at 5 months he suddenly went off the bottle which he had occasionally taken (so don't feel guilty about not introducing it earler). As I was due to start work when he was 7 months I tried everything to get him to take it - different teats, beakers, other people trying, expressed milk, different fomulas. My HV advised only offering breast morning and evening, and if he didn't take bottle during the day mixing lots of milk in his food. He gave me hell and I felt awful - it was hot weather and I was worried about him getting dehydrated. I would pour milk down his throat and he would be spluttering and crying. I gave up after 10 days and went back to exclusive breast feeding and a happy baby. I decided to let my childminder do the hard work once I had started working. As he was by then established on solids and I only work 3 days a week I didn't feel too guilty- I breast fed him on my days off. At first he refused the bottle with her and would be desparate for breast when I picked him up - clawing at me, then making me pay by waking up several times in the night thirsty. After 2 weeks with the childminder he got the idea that it was bottle or nothing and started to take it from her. Now at 8 and a half months he will accept the bottle from me and I am about to start on cutting down to just mornings and evenings every day.

My tip? Like others have said persevere. She won't let herself starve. At least once she is properly established on spoon feeding you can be tough with her without worring about her not getting enough food. My child minder has 30 years experience of looking after babies, she said some never learn to take a bottle and go straight on to a beaker.

Good luck!

Hello
I have not replied for a while as I wanted to have some good news... I finally got my little pain in the to take the bottle -THANK GOD!!!
I still have a long way to go but now I know she can drink from a bottle I am so happy I cant explain. Next week is my fouth an dlast week before I return to work. Up until Thursday last week I got really depressed, lost some weight, got a sty in my eye and just really emptionally tired. The stress of all this really got to me! Every day I was trying with the bottle but she cried and refused to let it near her. Then I got some great advice, This new mum I met told me her baby always refused milk if it was not hot, not warm! It had to be hot but obviously not hot enough to burn her. So I expressed only 4 ounzes(tired that night) and I bought cheap latex teats (superdrug make) thought I might as well try my millionth different teat, put some Frank Sinatra on and as someone else here suggested walk around and bobs your uncle as soon as the bottle went near her mouth she just start sucking like she always drank froma bottle and downed it in minutes I was so happy i almost cried. I repeated it again on her next feed but could only express 4 ounzes again so had to finish off with the breast. Then last night when she was not hungry I just offered her the bottle but with formula milk and she drank 2 ounzes!!! Today though she would not really take it - but Ive gother now she is not getting away with it now that Iknow she can do it. She is still refusing solids, thought I would give them a brake until she masters the bottle. Thank you all for yoru advice I will keep you informed, hopefully within th enext two weeks she will be taking the formula bottle for three of her feeds. i will continue to breast feed her morning and night. one more thing, she is almost 6 1/2 months, i feed her 5 times a day, should it be four and is it bad that she is not on solids yet, she is quite chubby so i know her weight is not a problem. thanks

No problem at all that she is not on solids - brilliant in fact. And what do you mean you ONLY expressed 4 oz, that is brilliant as well. I think you are more successful than you think you are. My friend did not give her ds solids until he was 8 months he was such a porker. The longer you leave it the better they tale them IMO. Glad you got the bottle cracked. Have you tried water or juice yet? Once you start solids you won't need to give a lot of formula - you could give water or juice once she is on 3 meals a day. You could start any time you like.

Agree with Mears, my ds is over 7 months and only has a spoon of pear or apple twice a day. I only insist on getting that into him that because I sneak in a probiotic to try to get a grip on eczema. He's cool about the medicine spoonful but beyond that he's not interested and I think it's silly to push it. Apparently eczema kids have big appetites, so at some point he'll just grab stuff and start eating.
You are doing brilliantly. Reread your original post and you will see how far you have come.

What good news! Well done!! You've also given some good new tips to other Mum's out there who are struggling. My dd drank about 5 X 9oz bottles a day and hardly touched any food until she was about 13 months and then when the weather got very hot, she just stopped drinking milk and is now loving her food - although I give her milk with her cereal, with tea (half milk and half decaf tea) and lots of yoghurts. Sorry, I’m babbling, what I am trying to say is that my dd survived practically on milk alone until 13 months and is a healthy happy baby/toddler. Although I'm not suggesting you don't try and feed your baby solids, I think as long as they are drinking enough milk they'll be absolutely fine. Well done and good luck with going back to work.

Hello again!
Just an update, what does dd mean? Im still learning :0! My daughter is still taking breast milk in a bottle most days, I offer her once a day. I want her to get excited when she sees the bottle before I change over to the formula. I think this will be my next battle. Because she is allergic to milk I have a milk called Nutramigen and my eyes watered when I tasted it, it is absolutely hideous! So I feel very sorry for her having to go from sweet tasting breastmilk to amonia tasting liquid. Any tips???
Speak soon.

dd is darling daughter or dearest daughter. Is it impossible to express and work? The formula sounds horrible and if she has allergies you would be protecting her from asthma and all sorts of other things by giving her breastmilk.

My 5 month dd is on Nutramigen too for same reason, and I agree with you on the taste! But do stick with it - I was advised to introduce it as early as possible, especially before weaning onto tasty pear and carrots etc before they have developed a taste for nicer things. Luckily she doesn't mind it and after some initial problems weaning (did not seam to want to swallow) is now happily taking mush, even just plain baby rice mixed with Nutramigen!

I'm still breastfeeding morning & evening too - so proof that mixed feeding (sweet & sour!) can work.

Keep up the good work - and hope you are feeling better in yourself now too.

paranoidmum - thats great to know that mixing works but do you have to express in the day and night? if not, then how long did it take for your breasts to adjust? i think i will try and get her onto the nutragema first before she is on solids. but im worried that by delaying solids it will be harder etc, she will be 7 months 23rd of oct.