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Feminism: chat

Creepy APA psychologist Lucio Buffalmano offering Red-Pill & PUA- inspired advice on self-improvement website

45 replies

AliasGrace47 · 11/11/2024 06:05

I've been doing some research into the manosphere in my spare time. I came across an article where APA psycologist Lucio Buffalmano criticised the RedPillers. I thought at first it was good that a man was calling them out. But then I looked a bit further at his site, & he seems to espouse a lot of really unpleasant & dangerous stuff while shying away from blatant manosphere stuff to avoid being called out.
He runs this social skills thing called The Power University which seems fairly popular. It's worrying he clearly has influence over socially unsure men who want guidance on how to act. I'll link the worrying stuff I've seen later : for now I'll just say that he claims to promote happy marriage, but in fact sees himself as a Casanova & recounts examples from multiple hookups in his articles, on the pretext of giving lessons. The women he sleeps with all seem to speak English poorly and be from different countries. There is no indication that they've agreed for intimate texts to be shared on his website - is this likely?
Here's a link to an article where he says there are cases where it's fine to ignore a woman's no, & it's often only token resistance.

thepowermoves.com/last-minute-resistance/

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XChrome · 15/11/2024 04:25

AliasGrace47 · 15/11/2024 03:53

I suppose he's flown under the radar bc he's not exactly well-known, & pretends to criticise redpillers, plus he's toned down the rhetoric in recent years. He claims to run the 'most-trafficked website on power in the world' (ofc 🙄) but it's not clear how many people are following it.
Re the APA thing, he could technically be a member as anyone can sign up- I tried as an experiment & you just give your email. You don't need a psycology background or anything.
On reddit, one user warned others about the Power Moves, saying Lucio had been criminally charged several times, (not clear what), & was aggressive, grandiose, threatening & a charlatan to his students. These comments were deleted by mods & the commenter seems shady w redpill leanings, but I suspect at least some was true.

https://www.reddit.com/user/BotCanadian/

Being on their mailing list is not the same as being accredited, which is what he claims to be.
Most trafficked website my ass. Given there's so little information on him out there, that can't be. From what I can see almost nobody is talking about him, so he must have only a small following.

samanthablues · 15/11/2024 10:44

Why promote on MN some red pill Mr nobody? Yes there’s plenty of incels out there and their very troubled followers. Anyone who promotes rape, sex abuse and misogyny on a public platform should be arrested or have their platform closed. We don’t really need to promote them on MN, but more like report them to the right authorities.

AliasGrace47 · 15/11/2024 13:04

samantha, I'm not promoting him! The website upset me quite a lot bc, unlike most of the redpillers, it hadn't really been challenged & seemed be introducing those ideas to more mainstream men who weren't into redpill. I wasn't sure what to do, I'm only 18, so I posted it here for advice.

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AliasGrace47 · 15/11/2024 13:28

Who would the right authorities be to report him to? It does skirt really close to promoting rape, & in some cases straight up says to ignore no. But is that illegal?

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samanthablues · 15/11/2024 15:10

AliasGrace47 · 15/11/2024 13:28

Who would the right authorities be to report him to? It does skirt really close to promoting rape, & in some cases straight up says to ignore no. But is that illegal?

I’m no lawyer so not sure about the legality of his platform as I’d rather dip my hand in boiling water than go through the whole mr red-pill spewing-nonsense-website. Talk with a friend lawyer and ask how to remove platforms from the internet that promote sexual abuse on women and misogyny.

VoodooQualities · 15/11/2024 20:35

I’d rather dip my hand in boiling water than go through the whole mr red-pill spewing-nonsense-website

Haha, my god yes.

I've actually spent a lot of time on the manosphere after a male friend of mine suggested I should... as I had/have a teenage son so better be aware of what's out there than not be. Haven't heard of this guy though. Not going to bother reading it.

My son seems to be coming through teenage years well adjusted and stable thank goodness.

Have you got a son/sons? That's the only reason I'd recommend anybody educate themselves on it. It's not worth scaring yourself otherwise.

AliasGrace47 · 15/11/2024 21:18

Voodoo, I don't read it much, it makes me sick. But we all need to be aware of extremists among us. Not to be paralysed w fear, it has to be small doses for me! But we need to monitor this stuff. Bc we all need to do what we can to fight this.
Mothers of sons obvs need to know. Girls my age who date boys need to know. (I'm lesbian, which takes 1 worry off my mind.) My male friends all seem nice, but this stuff makes you second guess people... Several of my friends have had v unpleasant experiences w boys who somehow think choking etc is standard sex, which imo is another form of dangerous radicalisation, by the porn industry.
& we all need to pressure the government to take action. Also tech companies. Reddit allows horribly misogynistic (also racist & homophobic) subreddits to stay on there. It could be argued that at least misogyny can be more easily monitored there, as opposed to more secret forums, but arguably it being there serves as a gateway drug & lends it a veneer of respectability. Esp when they deem gender critical to be hate speech, & you can't mention trans in the otherwise v open Change My View subreddit!

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AliasGrace47 · 15/11/2024 21:20

Sometimes I wish the Internet would break down forever.. I know it's helped many, but often now I feel the bad outweighs the good..

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VoodooQualities · 16/11/2024 22:02

Yes I agree. My son seems OK, has good elder male role models.

My daughter is a lesbian. Well I think she is anyway. She identifies as a boy so she and her girlfriend are a hetero couple 😵‍💫. But whatever, there are no penises involved so I've only skirted around the subject of red pill and porn-sick men with her.

AliasGrace47 · 16/11/2024 22:25

VoodooQualities · 16/11/2024 22:02

Yes I agree. My son seems OK, has good elder male role models.

My daughter is a lesbian. Well I think she is anyway. She identifies as a boy so she and her girlfriend are a hetero couple 😵‍💫. But whatever, there are no penises involved so I've only skirted around the subject of red pill and porn-sick men with her.

That's good. I think it's insecure boys without real life male examples who are most at risk.

Gender ideology has confused lots of young people... It's hard when my one of my best friends (bi) is now suddenly trans (due to family homophobia I think) & my crush is now agender... I'm sure this gender stuff will go fairly soon, I think the tide is turning, & w the Trump win, the left are seeing the far right will rise unless they get over the gender rubbish.
I would though try to find a way to warn your dd that she should never feel pressured to have sex w someone, & that if she's not attracted to male bodied people, pre or pist op, that's not transphobic. There's a lot of harmful rhetoric out there.. Fortunately most young trans people are quite vocal, so it should be clear who is. I don't want to scaremonger, esp as I don't know any trans girls in real life & the rhetoric seems to mainly come from older men, but it's something to be aware of..

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VoodooQualities · 17/11/2024 12:25

Yes thank you, I appreciate the advice. Sadly I don't know any lesbian couples (apart from my daughter lol). I'd really like her to meet some lesbians so she could see that being gay is great, and being same-sex attracted doesn't mean you aren't a female.

I'm 100% fine with gender non-conformity, in fact I'm actually proud of her that she's rejecting the girly girl nonsense, the hair and makeup and the tiny short skirts her classmates wear, and all the rest of the crap that seems to go along with being female these days.

It's just when you start talking about surgery and hormones, honestly I'm really worried. I just don't see much evidence of positive outcomes for most boys and girls who go down that route. For some yes, of course.

She's only 14, so she's got plenty of time to work out who she is. In the meantime she's top of the class in every subject, she's chatty, she volunteers as a young leader at Brownies. She's doing great.

VoodooQualities · 17/11/2024 12:38

Gosh I've really hijacked and derailed this thread haven't I, and made it all about me!

We can go back to taking about red pill.

VoodooQualities · 17/11/2024 12:48

In many ways our society has come so far in terms of women's emancipation and opportunities for us. But male control of women as a whole has changed from being overt, to more subtle and covert. Mysogeny still runs through the very cores of our lives just as it ever did.

AliasGrace47 · 17/11/2024 13:07

Voodoo, no, no, that's fine- it's nice to have a break from the red pill. It's really good you're letting your dd know she can be gnc. You're def right about the pressure to be feminine these days, in some ways it seems worse than 70s, where tomboys were more accepted (at least from what I've read).

Surgery & hormones are def bad for most, esp underage. Fortunately they've been banned for under 18s, & I think if you keep a close eye, (maybe keep an eye on what she's looking at online?) you should be able to keep her away from that. It's tricky if she really believes she's a boy, but I would try to emphasise that puberty is hard for all, esp if you're gay & gnc, which are fine ofc, but can cause you to feel like an outsider. & that no one can really change sex, & that w true gender dysphoria you feel in the wrong body from a young age (although ofc that still might not be bc of dysphoria).

My trans male friend got into it at 16 bc his parents were often faraway in home country & he spent long nights online being indoctrinated. AFAIK he hasn't actually done anything hormonal & he may not. The agender person also hasn't. I think if you keep talking w your dd & don't let her get swept up in gender ideology, it should be fine.

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VoodooQualities · 17/11/2024 13:19

One thing that's lovely, is she's totally unashamed. There's nothing in herself or around her that makes her feel she can't talk about and express who she is and what she feels. She didn't really even 'come out' to us as such. She just had this best friend, and one day we noticed they were holding hands, and they kissed each other goodbye when she went home.

Isn't that just brilliant?

VoodooQualities · 17/11/2024 13:30

Yes we keep a close eye on her online life and we have had those types of conversation you mention.

She's not looking at anything sinister online, I can log into her phone and I do so pretty regularly when she's asleep. I don't read her personal WhatsApps or anything, she's allowed some privacy of course.

AliasGrace47 · 17/11/2024 13:31

Sounds like your dd is really involved in stuff, which is v good. I think people are most vulnerable if they're lonely & isolated. A bit like w the redpill!
Yes, misogyny is def still prevalent. I feel like it's less accepted in many places, but it's scary how popular the manosphere etc is, & the far right

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VoodooQualities · 17/11/2024 13:33

I can log onto my son's phone too. He has DuckDuckGo installed, which is the porn users browser of choice.

My husband talks to him about porn and helps him understand it and navigate it. I don't think you can stop a young lad looking at porn to be honest, it must be like being a kid in a sweet shop.

AliasGrace47 · 17/11/2024 13:34

That's so nice, you sound really supportive. & if you keep an eye on her online activity she shouldn't be at risk from trans stuff. I think what happened w my friend makes me worry too much about it!

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AliasGrace47 · 17/11/2024 13:41

Voodoo, can you not put porn filters on his phone? Some porn is probs OK, but so much has popularised stuff like choking etc, unrealistic bodies & obvs a lot of stuff on mainstream sites may not be consensually filmed .. That's good your husband talks to him, the problem I think is when boys don't have someone to process it with so it all seems real.
It's a shame more moderate outlets are not available, or at least not so well known as the weird ones..

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